#104: Candice Ackerman / Coached By Candice

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Welcome to another episode of
Come Together

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and we're live Again.
Hello.

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Welcome, Candace.
I'm so excited that you're here.

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Thanks.
For doing this, I'm very excited

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to be here.
Thank you for reaching out.

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Of course, of course, of course.
Yeah, it's, it's been funny

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because I have been, you know,
when I called e-mail people, I

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my follow my, I think I got
maybe 30% response rate

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approximately right, which is
not bad.

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But then it goes up like a bunch
when I follow up even just once.

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And like you, you know, like it
does.

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It lets people know that I'm not
just a bot or some kind of spam

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e-mail letting them know what's
you know and just just reaching

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out to them.
It's like I said, you're a real

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life person.
Yeah, that's right.

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It's a, it's two factor
authentication.

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You know, it's, it's one e-mail
and two emails.

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Why don't you tell me just a
little bit about yourself and

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then we can kind of talk about
everything we want to talk

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about.
Yeah, sure.

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So I am in the ecosystem of
health and well-being married to

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an amazing man with three
children and their three sons,

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they 2724 and 20.
So it's really been an

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incredible journey of blending
parenthood with the whole

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ecosystem of health and
well-being and where we're at.

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I'm passionate about animals,
children, I love the business

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that we're in.
I love making a difference in

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people's lives.
And, you know, getting to speak

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to people like yourself who are
so interested and, and are

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curious always makes it exciting
and, and different to have these

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kind of conversations.
Definitely, Yeah, Yeah.

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Well, I mean, that's I, that's
kind of a push me to get started

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doing this.
One of the main factors was

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like, I just feel like I need
more, like I think more

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interesting people and types of
people in my life, you know, and

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you know, and I used to travel
quite a bit for work when I was

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single, you know, I, and it was
pretty much voluntary.

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I didn't really need to if I
didn't want to.

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But you know, we, you know, I
saw medical equipment and if

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there's a big ultrasound machine
or a DEXA machine going to

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customer, then I'll take an
opportunity to take a road trip

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or I'd meet the customer when
the freight company arrived and

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I got to check out some awesome,
awesome cities around the

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country, big cities, small
cities.

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And I love just stopping in.
Like I would ask where locals

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hang out and then I would just
stop by wherever like the, you

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know, the local scene was,
whether it's a bar or coffee

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shop or, you know, just wherever
many people would hang out.

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And I'd love talking to people
and every America is amazing

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because there's it's a town and
city and state has like so much

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of their own personalities and
so much of their own like, you

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know, style of human, flavor of
human that I was like, I got to

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just keep on doing more of this.
I think this is amazing.

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So it kind of pushed me to
start.

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Well, you know what I mean?
To that point, the exciting

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thing about the US is that
literally every city is like its

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own country and the opportunity
to travel and just this melting

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pot of immigrants, which really
the foundation of what the US is

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all about is just so
interesting.

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From the culture to the food, to
the colours, the smells, the the

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architecture, it's really an
exciting place.

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And the luxury and the privilege
to travel and meet these people

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and live like a local is, is
what grows.

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It grows your passion, it just
grows your outlook and it just

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give you a different perspective
on the world.

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Yeah, definitely, definitely.
And I think that I love, I love

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touristy things too, because
they exist for a reason.

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You know, cliches are fun, but,
you know, but like, I feel like

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you get down to like the real
rawness and real grittiness.

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And I, you know, I feel the same
thing actually about like, and I

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noticed that that's what I liked
about the podcasting world was

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it could be as authentic as you
want it to be.

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It could be as polished as you
want it to be.

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It could be as raw as you want
it to be.

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And there's no right or wrong,
it's just whatever your flavour

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is.
And then just go and find, you

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know, and go find it.
Have you got a chance?

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When did you You said, You told
me you came to the States, what,

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four or five years ago?
Yeah, absolutely.

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In December of 2020 and.
Good timing.

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Tell me about it.
Especially because I'm from

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South Africa originally.
And we had like really hectic

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lockdowns.
Like we weren't, we weren't

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allowed to leave our homes and
only one person was allowed to

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go to the grocery store at a
time.

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And unless you were an essential
worker, literally essentially

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you weren't allowed to move.
And so when we arrived, nobody

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was wearing a mask.
Kids were in school, businesses

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were open, people were out
celebrating.

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And we were like, what happened
was this, Did this really just

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only happen in South Africa?
But obviously we know that it

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didn't.
So.

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Yeah, so.
It started so COVID started in

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South Africa before it hit the
states.

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No, no, no, it was all at the
same time.

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It was all around the same time.
Yeah, I mean, there was talk

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about it and then all of a
sudden it literally just spread.

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One month they were talking
about there was this thing

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happening in the US and then the
next minute there was patient

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number one, I think in South
Africa that had been in France

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and came and then it was just
like wildfire in the whole

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world.
You kind of just watched like

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this Domino.
That was crazy.

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That was.
Crazy and it was what just

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happened.
So when we arrived it was Oh my

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goodness gracious me.
This is just, this is just

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crazy.
So it was a good place to be

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during COVID to see that people
functioned and lived and, and

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despite all the stories we were
being told, laugh was continuing

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and people were doing laugh,
right.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, some people were, you

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know, some people were I, I, I,
yeah.

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I was living at the time.
I was living in Washington, in

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Seattle.
I lived there for a year with my

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friends.
And it's actually funny because

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I was never ever, ever really
politically aware in general.

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And so like when I had told
friends and family that I was

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moving to Seattle, I would get
very mixed responses based on

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what my, my friend, you know,
who I was talking to.

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But I never really thought that
it would impact, like, it never

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really did impact day-to-day
life, right?

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So I was like, OK, so let's say
it's a predominantly left city,

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like who cares?
Like that doesn't affect me.

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When I go to the supermarket,
I'm saying hi to the cashier.

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It doesn't affect the, you know,
the group of friends I'm going

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to choose to hang out with, the
beer I'm going to drink or the

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weed I'm going to smoke.
You know, like, you know, none

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of that matters.
So but then when COVID hit, you

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got to see really the different
responses across the states

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also, which was fun and really,
really interesting to observe.

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And what I thought was cool was
that I was going back and forth

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between New York and Washington
at that point.

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I'm originally from New York,
and then I was living in

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Washington and in New York life
did just come to like a grinding

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halt.
And that was it in Washington.

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I don't know whether there's
something about West Coast

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mentality or not in Washington,
people were like essentially

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shut down, but people were still
continuing life outdoors and

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doing their best to like kind of
keep on living.

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And so, you know, our days
actually became full of and F

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when I was still working from
home, our days became full of

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walks to the park and going down
into the lake and, you know,

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hanging on our backyard.
And like, if you want to have

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friends over, you don't hang out
in front of ATV.

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You hang out in the backyard
because that's open space, it's

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safe, you know, whatever it is.
And it just turned out to have

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been awesome in that kind of,
you know, manifestation, the way

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it manifested.
So it's cool to like, again, you

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know, the state's eclecticness,
to see the different responses

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even.
And you know, I think to that

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point about you spoke about
connecting and connection and

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hanging out with people, so many
people in, in the very harsher

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environment, environments lost
that level of connection and

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really craved that human
connection.

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And people became introverted
and people became scared and

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people became so isolated that
they're isolated themselves.

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And it's taken a lot of a lot of
people a long time to open

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themselves up again to trust
being with people.

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It's not trying.
You're in.

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Experience haven't done.
It.

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Yet, yeah, from little kids to
teenagers, that gap in time

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where they were really harsh
restrictions in place pulled

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people apart.
It didn't bother.

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And well, we blessed that we're
not in the space and time

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anymore.
And please God, we never will be

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so.
Yeah, yeah.

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What was what, what was it like
as a parent observing at that

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point would have been what, like
a 15 year old, 20 year old and

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like 18 year old.
I mean, it's actually funny

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because my siblings, I'm 29.
My youngest sibling is 14 and we

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were all home around the same
time, but I'm curious about the

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consequences.
Do you notice educationally,

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socially, habits?
Yeah, so it was interesting

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because we had planned our move
to the US and I had given school

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for my youngest.
I'd given them notice and

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basically lockdown happened and
I'd given them notice and pretty

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much a few weeks later he was,
he was ending school.

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So it was the first time that
the US had ever had an

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international student online.
So he then changed his hours.

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He came onto American time.
We were going to bed and he was

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just in the middle of his school
day and waking up in the morning

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and he'd be sleeping because he
had just finished homework.

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So that was a real change and he
was living the US life

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virtually.
How do you like that?

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Sorry, did.
He like it.

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He, he did, I mean, he, he's a
very curious person with lots of

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bold opinions and views.
And so to, to have that like

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that look into a world that he
was going into but wasn't quite

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present in, it was exciting for
him.

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And of course, it was totally
different.

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And the whole educational system
is different.

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So he kind of led an American
life and on his own time zone.

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And then my, my two older boys,
the middle one had just finished

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high school and had applied to
College in the US and had gotten

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in and couldn't come.
And so I had to defer, defer and

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my oldest had finished his
undergrad and he looked and he

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was coming for his masters in
the US and same thing had to

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defer, defer.
So watching the two older guys,

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they landed up doing a course,
they landed up brainstorming

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like where to what next?
Kind of tapping into their,

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their, their personal genius
and, and entrepreneurial

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spirits.
And we had.

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A good time in that process.
Are you and your husband in that

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process?
So they're create how?

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Involved.
Are you guys in their process in

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terms of like what to do next?
Do they welcome your input?

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Do you guys like them kind of
just do their own thing?

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How does that work?
So we have always been like

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completely open, transparent, we
talk about everything.

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We nothing is off limits as far
as discussions are concerned.

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But it was a collective decision
as a family to come to the US.

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Everybody had brought in coming
to the US and so that was easy.

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But what do you do with these
beautiful young man's that are

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bright and eager and full of
adventure, new possibilities and

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then you shut down and they
can't go anywhere.

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So watching them embrace, as I
said during a couple of courses,

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we when we got wind what was
happening, we set up a home gym.

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So, you know, the whole focus
went into, you know, keeping

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ourselves fit and healthy and
just having endless

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conversations.
And it was about around about

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that time where we came up with
the name for our business that

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we have in the US.
And it was a time of of a lot of

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growth and opportunity and
getting to know each other

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without any interruptions.
And I know that sounds crazy and

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weird, but with the everyday
humdrum of life, you never get

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down into those real deep,
beautiful conversations.

227
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And the gift of that situation
was that's exactly what we had.

228
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Yeah.
Yeah, that sounds, it sounds

229
00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:21,280
awesome.
It sounds like, it's funny

230
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:23,960
because I feel like COVID was
either especially the beginning,

231
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:27,040
like, you know, the first like
couple of months was either the

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00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:30,640
best thing to happen to a lot of
families or the worst thing to

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00:13:30,640 --> 00:13:34,320
happen to people, you know, I
mean, I know I the divorce rate

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00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:38,160
exploded, you know, alcoholism
exploded, you know, the, you

235
00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:42,600
know, friends, family members,
everyone was ripping each

236
00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:46,200
other's heads off or having the
best time in the entire world,

237
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:48,560
you know, and like, it was very,
very rarely that there was like

238
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:51,640
a middle ground.
But I think what was so

239
00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:55,080
interesting looking back about
it, I think there was even a

240
00:13:55,080 --> 00:14:01,320
kind of sense of awareness of it
at the time is how much fat

241
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:04,640
there is on our day-to-day life.
That could just be like cut out

242
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:09,000
that we don't necessarily need.
And that has to do with our

243
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,880
jobs.
It has to do with what we

244
00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:13,640
whether you know, going to the
supermarket over, you know, or

245
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:16,280
doing errands versus spending
time with our family.

246
00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:18,160
Oh, there are alternative
methods for that kind of stuff

247
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,840
to get done.
Could it be done effectively and

248
00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:23,080
while building your
relationships and like pursuing

249
00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:27,840
your, your hobbies and passions?
And like, I think that starting

250
00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:31,800
2020, you know, March 2020 till
today, people are real.

251
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:34,400
Like in the US, there's been
movements I've, I've seen all

252
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,000
over the place now for four day
work weeks.

253
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,520
Like we just don't need, like,
we don't need 5 dates, you know,

254
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:39,960
like we don't need 6 days, only
seven days.

255
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:43,480
Like, and then, and people are
talking about how remote jobs

256
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:44,840
are good or bad.
By the way, I see your

257
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:49,200
expression and I'll let you, I'm
curious, I'm curious what you

258
00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:51,600
think of that.
But I think that it's almost

259
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:55,720
inevitable that as technology
gets better and we find

260
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,720
ourselves a little bit more
obsolete in terms of like the

261
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:03,400
way the world just runs, that we
can either choose to be

262
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:08,600
disciplined and effective and
loving and human, or we're going

263
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:13,120
to be, you know, Alcoholics that
are, you know, that are bored

264
00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:15,240
out of our minds and breaking
up, you know, and, and the

265
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,680
divorce rate will fire up and
like, they'll probably be a

266
00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,840
little bit of both, you know.
But yes, what do you think?

267
00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:24,080
No, you know.
I, I think what COVID did do and

268
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:30,400
not to linger on, on the whole
COVID thing is that it really

269
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:34,680
brought the world to one point
where everybody was happy to use

270
00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:37,480
any form of technology to
connect, right?

271
00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:40,640
So all of a sudden you don't
have to be in person to attend a

272
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:44,520
meeting.
You don't have to wait to get on

273
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:48,480
that flight to see somebody.
It allowed and it does allow for

274
00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:50,680
immediate interaction as we're
having today.

275
00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:56,120
But what it doesn't replace is
that you can't build a culture

276
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:57,680
unless you're together.
I'm sorry.

277
00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:00,680
About that, that was my fault.
Give me your thought.

278
00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:01,400
I'm sorry.
Please.

279
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:04,040
No worries.
So as I say, not to linger on

280
00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:07,880
the COVID thing because we've
come so far, it did allow us all

281
00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,880
to be able to connect globally.
We didn't.

282
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:11,240
You don't have to jump on a
plane.

283
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:14,000
You can have a meeting, you can
connect like we are doing today

284
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,800
and you feel like you're with
the person and it's to a level

285
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:20,600
quite intimate.
However, it doesn't allow you to

286
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,720
build a culture.
From a business perspective, if

287
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:26,560
everybody's placed all over the
world and all over the country,

288
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:29,760
you can't build a culture and
that can be replaced.

289
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,840
The human connection can never
be replaced.

290
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:37,800
Sitting in front of somebody,
sealing, seeing their their

291
00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:41,560
emotions and and seeing how they
do things and working

292
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:47,600
collaboratively is what counts.
So whilst I think that there's a

293
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:52,600
place for it, nothing will ever
replace human one-on-one

294
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,480
contact.
And we need it.

295
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:58,080
We do.
We do, but, but I, I think that

296
00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:01,560
a lot of people are not
fortunate enough to have their

297
00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:04,640
place of work be the place where
they have their emotional

298
00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:07,560
connections or even like
positive connections, you know.

299
00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,000
And so for those people, you
know, I have friends, for

300
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,960
example, that are accountants
that don't need to be in the

301
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:16,040
office except, and there are
particular times of the year

302
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:19,960
where busy season they do and
they do say, listen, it works a

303
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:23,920
lot better when there's a, a, a
hustle in the air and there's

304
00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:26,800
some enthusiasm in like, and
it's wonderful.

305
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,920
But the other seven months of
the year, 6 months of the year

306
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:32,200
when it's dead, you know, and
they don't go, they don't have

307
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:35,400
to go in.
Then the benefit is that I've

308
00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:36,920
worked remotely with friends
before.

309
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:38,960
You know, like when we when we
moved to when I moved to

310
00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:41,560
Washington, I was the four was
the three other friends.

311
00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:44,440
All of us were single, all of us
were doing different professions

312
00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:47,920
and three of us were in the
house 90% of the day, you know,

313
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:51,040
and, and we got that and we got
that best friendship.

314
00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:53,000
You know, they were able to all,
you know, we were able to hang

315
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,720
out and we did our own things
and we were going together.

316
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:59,960
And so it gives us the
flexibility to be able to kind

317
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:02,480
of pursue those friendships if
we're not lucky enough to have

318
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:04,880
them at work.
But if work is your culture and

319
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,680
like work is that like if you're
a teacher, if you're, you know,

320
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:09,880
if you're, you know, if you work
at a gym, you're working at a

321
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:14,560
very people forward kind of
people facing position, then you

322
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:16,880
definitely want that culture and
you definitely want to be

323
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:18,520
embodied, you know.
Yeah.

324
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,880
And.
But to your point, you were

325
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:24,000
living with friends and so you
you could nurture relationships.

326
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,720
A lot of people live on their
own, Yeah.

327
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:30,320
They live with a spouse.
And so, you know, how much

328
00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:33,760
productivity is there really?
How much are they getting from

329
00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:35,800
the person they're with?
Or there is nobody with them.

330
00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:37,960
But a dog in some cases isn't
even a dog.

331
00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:42,000
So they, their level of
productivity isn't there and

332
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,440
their level of being needed.
And there's something about

333
00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,280
being needed, being that little
cog in the wheel that pulls

334
00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:52,040
everything together with without
that, some people really, really

335
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:53,200
struggle.
True.

336
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,480
Yeah, Yeah, I think, I think it
depends on the job.

337
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:57,120
I think it depends on the person
on the job.

338
00:18:57,120 --> 00:19:00,160
But I think that I think that
it's a really cool.

339
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:04,040
It's it was inconceivable even
10 years ago, you know, the kind

340
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:06,840
of flexibility that we have or,
you know, when people started

341
00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:10,240
realizing that Instacart was an
option for getting, you know,

342
00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:12,360
groceries.
And instead of me spending 45

343
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:15,080
minutes going to the supermarket
to get a couple of things for

344
00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:18,160
dinner, you know, we can order
that and I could get a couple of

345
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,920
my kids to bed at night.
Like that's such a, you know,

346
00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:22,760
and that and that changes
everything and it really does,

347
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:26,560
it can change our connections.
So I'm excited about, I think

348
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:28,440
that.
So, you know, COVID good or bad

349
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:30,320
or, you know, whatever it was in
the day.

350
00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,920
I think like everything in the
world, you could take, you know,

351
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,840
there's good you could take from
it and there's not.

352
00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:39,040
So I there's so many things I
wanted to talk to you about.

353
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:42,640
Walk away.
Listening.

354
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:45,040
Let's talk about parenting a
little bit.

355
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:50,120
What have you learned raising
three boys?

356
00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:53,840
The old has been 27, you said?
Yeah.

357
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:58,200
Old has been 2724.
Well, he turns 27 in in three

358
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,720
weeks time and 20.
Yeah, so.

359
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:11,720
Tell me if if you have
recommendations, right, you

360
00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:16,880
know, general rules that you
found worked or didn't work in

361
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:20,680
terms of raising your kids.
You want to elaborate on some of

362
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,200
these ideas?
Yeah, sure.

363
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,960
It's pleasure.
So one thing I do know for sure,

364
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:28,080
you don't get a manual when
you're a parent, right?

365
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:33,520
So it's, it's some it's, it's
something that comes from within

366
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,920
and you as a parent do the best
that you can.

367
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:41,760
And, and you just given the
privilege of just growing these

368
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:46,280
beautiful gifts and children
are, and I said earlier and an

369
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:48,480
absolute privilege and and gift
to have around.

370
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:54,080
For me as a parent, I have found
that what has worked for me is

371
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:57,520
always being the adults in the
room, not responding badly to

372
00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:02,440
situations, right?
Children Act up, they say

373
00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:05,040
things, they do things for
attention.

374
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:11,680
And you don't want to meet that
need with negative feedback,

375
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:15,280
right?
So from my perspective is always

376
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,400
showing up for my kids in
whichever shape, way of form

377
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,600
that they need.
Always knowing that no matter

378
00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:25,080
what, I have their back.
I may not like their behavior or

379
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,520
what they've done, but I I'll
always love them.

380
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:30,600
I'll always bet for them.
But they need to stand

381
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,880
accountable for what they do and
say as well.

382
00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:41,240
And they have to develop their
own sense of who they are and

383
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:43,880
and not just follow the status
quo.

384
00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:46,320
How do you encourage?
That.

385
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:53,960
When they talk to you about
their own needs and desires and

386
00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:56,960
when they were younger, when
they were at school, if, if, if

387
00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:00,200
they had uncomfortable run
insurance with their friends or,

388
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:05,360
you know, typical school grounds
situations is, is listening and,

389
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:11,400
and you know, questioning and
asking and not blaming and, you

390
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:14,960
know, letting them come to
conclusions on their own and

391
00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:21,720
troubleshooting and what ifs and
just listening and, and holding

392
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:25,440
space for them.
I have found to be, you know,

393
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,080
very advantageous.
And even now, you know, it's

394
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:32,680
like, do you want me to listen?
Do you want me to give you

395
00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:36,520
input?
Whatever you need from me, You

396
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:40,800
tell me what you want and kind
of growing up and and being with

397
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:43,440
my boys in that respect, I was
privileged when they were young.

398
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:49,520
I was with them.
It was it was it was beautiful

399
00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:53,720
to watch how three different
people had three different needs

400
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:55,320
and still have three different
needs.

401
00:22:55,320 --> 00:22:58,200
And I have to address all three
of them differently.

402
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:05,160
And just, you know, there's
something about gentle

403
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:09,800
parenting, which is, which is a
beautiful thing.

404
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:12,600
And especially having boys,
people think you've got to be

405
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,560
super tough.
And, you know, boys are rough

406
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,240
and rugged and you know, they
can handle everything.

407
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,440
Boys still need to be dealt with
gently.

408
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:22,040
Boys need to be taught.
Boys are so.

409
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:24,320
Sensitive so.
Sensitive.

410
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:26,760
Amazing.
It's crazy, right?

411
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:30,880
But they need to be taught how
to how to treat women.

412
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:35,280
They they need to be taught that
chivalry isn't a dying art, that

413
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,960
they need to they need to have
you always.

414
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,840
Known this, have you when you
have you like did you, is this

415
00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:45,720
something that you had learned
or read about or picked up as

416
00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:48,280
like you were being a parent
throughout the years?

417
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,680
Or is that something that you
knew going into being a parent?

418
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:53,160
So like when you're, you know,
or was it because I know, for

419
00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:55,880
example, my mom has a very
similar perspective to you.

420
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:59,240
Yeah.
When I, when I was 5, she did

421
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:02,240
not have that perspective, you
know, that she has now, you

422
00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:05,840
know, and but I know that she,
you know, we're, we're, we're,

423
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:08,160
we're, we're, we're, we're a
family of Orthodox Jews.

424
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:14,440
And I know that she spends a lot
of time contemplating and

425
00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:18,920
working on her, working on her
mannerisms and her personality

426
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:22,360
and her personality traits.
And she's always trying to be

427
00:24:22,360 --> 00:24:25,640
better and learn more about
people and herself and how to be

428
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:30,680
a better mom.
But that's, I feel like that's a

429
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:32,400
pretty rare thing.
I feel like that's not what

430
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:33,720
every mom in the world is like,
you know?

431
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,440
And it's wonderful to hear that
you're, that you're, that you're

432
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:38,040
describing the same thing.
But did you always have that, or

433
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:39,680
is that something that came to
you over the years?

434
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,520
I so, so desperately wanted to
be a mom.

435
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:47,440
I mean, for me, that was like
one of the highest accolades

436
00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:50,640
and, and an absolute privilege
to be able to be called mom.

437
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:56,120
So I went in with very clear
ideas and routines and

438
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:59,640
disciplines and principles and
all these things that I wanted

439
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,720
for my children, thinking that
they were absolutely the right

440
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,800
way.
But as I said, you know, each,

441
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,760
each child presented with
different needs and wants.

442
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:13,800
And so I had to evolve how I was
from my first one to my second

443
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:16,440
one to my third one.
Is that hard?

444
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:22,080
You know, initially I wasn't
really aware of it, but as their

445
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:26,360
little personality started
developing, then like, OK, well,

446
00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:30,760
actually you come from the same
DNAI cannot believe that you

447
00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:32,040
come from three different
planets.

448
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:38,720
But yes, absolutely.
So it, it was and it wasn't I, I

449
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:43,400
more celebrated seeing how
individual they really were and,

450
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,680
and trying to meet them where
they were at with their needs.

451
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:52,240
And to your mom's point of
trying to grow and, and bet

452
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,480
ourselves and be more present
for my children as they've

453
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:58,560
gotten older, Of course, my
parenting style has evolved and

454
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:01,840
it will continue to evolve.
I was having a conversation with

455
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:04,680
with one of my sons today and
that's exactly what I was

456
00:26:04,680 --> 00:26:07,000
saying.
You never stop parenting, but

457
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:12,520
your parenting style evolves and
you you go into different

458
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:17,120
relationships at different times
with your children and it's

459
00:26:17,120 --> 00:26:23,280
exciting and.
I think that, yeah.

460
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:24,680
Go ahead, please.
You didn't.

461
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:28,800
Yeah, Yeah.
It's just remarkable that there

462
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:33,440
isn't a rule book, and it's
remarkable that what worked when

463
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:35,600
they were five didn't work when
they were 8.

464
00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:38,200
And, and, and, and so we go
along the way.

465
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:42,440
I think too, a lot of parents
feel under pressure and they

466
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:46,520
feel very stressed about seem to
be doing the right thing, seem

467
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:50,600
to be the, the, the perfect
parents.

468
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:53,240
It's not about being perfect.
It's just about being good

469
00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:54,880
enough.
It's about being there for your

470
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:58,840
children, loving them.
It's about helping them to see

471
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,560
what lies within them and
helping them to know that it's

472
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:04,600
OK to make a mistake and start
again.

473
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:08,800
And I'm sure in five years time
I would have evolved more and my

474
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:12,120
children will get better things
out of me then than they did

475
00:27:12,120 --> 00:27:15,800
when they were younger.
But what I do know is that

476
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:19,720
they're a gift.
I love being a mom.

477
00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:26,240
And just if their mom's
listening out there, just be

478
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,280
kind to yourself.
Just love them and laugh with

479
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:30,760
them.
It's not so serious.

480
00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:34,000
It doesn't have to be perfect,
but you think a lot of people

481
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,080
need to.
Hear that?

482
00:27:36,360 --> 00:27:38,760
Sorry you think a lot.
Of people need to hear that they

483
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:41,600
do.
I think a lot of people do need

484
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:44,400
to hear that, yeah.
Yeah.

485
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:46,320
I wonder what contributes to
that.

486
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:50,520
I wonder why, because it's so
one of the things I was talking

487
00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:53,440
to my friend, you know, I'm one
of for some of my friends.

488
00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,640
It's funny, I have different
feet in different worlds and

489
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:58,800
depending, you know, and
depending on what world I'm in,

490
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:01,080
my conversations with my friends
are super, super different with

491
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:03,840
one another.
And, and one friend was asking

492
00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:08,680
me what it's like to have a kid
because I have, I'm 29 with a 2

493
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:12,480
year old and a one month old.
And so I'm, I'm at the starting

494
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:15,240
point over here.
And, and one of the things he

495
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:19,160
asked me like maybe three or
four months into my son being

496
00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:23,360
born was my oldest being born
was what's the most surprising

497
00:28:23,360 --> 00:28:27,560
thing to you?
And I said it's really, really

498
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:31,840
hard, but I'm surprised how,
like, I usually have a low

499
00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:34,960
tolerance for challenging
things, you know, And like

500
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:36,880
mentally like I'm like, I don't
want to do things.

501
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:41,800
And like, it was like, it's
amazing how I want, like, I want

502
00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:43,920
to do the hard work.
I want to do the hard stuff.

503
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,160
And like, it's not fun.
Like, I can't tell you, like,

504
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:47,320
it's fun waking up in the middle
of the night.

505
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:48,960
But like, when you wake up in
the middle of the night and like

506
00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:51,640
you're there for that moment and
the kid goes back to bed and,

507
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:52,840
and like everything is good
again.

508
00:28:52,840 --> 00:28:55,680
And you know, that you, you
know, had been responsible.

509
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:58,040
You've responded to the
situation appropriately.

510
00:28:58,560 --> 00:29:01,560
Like that's like, that's the
best thing you could do for

511
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:03,920
yourself, you know?
And, but I also feel like it

512
00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:06,400
comes naturally.
So I wonder what happens along

513
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,560
the way that people kind of lose
that labour of love.

514
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,920
I'm not so sure it's about
losing the labor of love.

515
00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:18,120
I think a lot of parents are
have very demanding careers.

516
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:23,720
Sometimes they in ill health
themselves, sometimes they

517
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:26,720
struggling emotionally or
mentally and they don't know how

518
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:29,240
to shop for their kids.
I mean, there's a lot of

519
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:31,760
reasons.
I don't think any parent

520
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:35,040
knowingly or wantingly wants to
give up.

521
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:41,480
But we sometimes people take
their life experiences from when

522
00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:44,600
they were growing up and they
copy and pasted and they aren't

523
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:47,880
able to break a cycle.
So they they perceive parenthood

524
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:53,240
to be a hard thing.
They don't necessarily deal with

525
00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:57,040
their own baggages or stories
that they came from.

526
00:29:57,040 --> 00:30:00,520
And so it's hard.
And then the other parents where

527
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,080
they go, hey, this is this is
how I grew up.

528
00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:06,200
It was great, but I feel like I
can do it differently.

529
00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:12,000
I feel like I want more from it.
And I feel that you have a duty

530
00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:16,000
and responsibility to show up in
the best way, shape, and form

531
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,360
that you can.
And there is no right or wrong

532
00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:23,320
way if your intentions are
honorable and good and full of

533
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,800
love and it's full of nurture
and it's full of fun.

534
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:29,960
And of course, you've got to
have rules and and boundaries in

535
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:32,960
place.
But this is a beautiful time, as

536
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:35,720
you know right now.
And your days are very long,

537
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:39,840
right?
But these years are so few, and

538
00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:42,040
then you're out of it.
Everybody's sleeping and

539
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:44,720
everybody's eating and
everybody's at sport and

540
00:30:44,720 --> 00:30:47,920
everybody's got friends and the
bat mitzvahs and bar mitzvahs

541
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,480
and celebrations and
everything's happening, right.

542
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:54,680
And, and then all those years
that you would.

543
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,240
I wish this part would hurry up.
They're gone.

544
00:30:57,720 --> 00:30:59,000
Yeah.
Yeah.

545
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:01,240
Do you remember the movie?
Did you watch the Adam Sandler

546
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:01,640
movie?
Click.

547
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,960
Do you remember that movie?
Vaguely, but I.

548
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:07,840
The premise of the movie, it's
supposed to be a comedy.

549
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:11,560
I watched it, I watched it once
and I never revisited because it

550
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:14,760
made me cry and feel so
intensely that I was like, I'm

551
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:16,360
not prepared.
I don't know if I'm ever willing

552
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:20,120
to do that to myself again.
But it's a Adam Sandler comedy

553
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:23,600
drama ish.
Then the premise is that you get

554
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:25,520
this remote that you could like
Fast forward his way through

555
00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:30,040
life, but he can't go back at a
certain point.

556
00:31:30,360 --> 00:31:33,680
And so, and then the thing
learns from him and so learns

557
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:35,640
what to skip and learns what to
deal with or not.

558
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:38,160
And he skips his fights with his
wife initially and he's having

559
00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:40,160
so much fun with it and he's
skipping, you know, having to

560
00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:41,920
pick his kid up from school.
I don't want to deal with that.

561
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:43,600
Let me just Fast forward to when
that's over.

562
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:48,120
And then at the end, like, and
then basically he skipped all of

563
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:50,600
his responsibilities, which was
essentially his whole life.

564
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,520
And then he just woke up and he
was an old man.

565
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:57,640
He was about to die and like,
and that was it, you know, and I

566
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:00,560
mean, it wasn't a very subtle
metaphor at all.

567
00:32:00,880 --> 00:32:05,000
You know, I mean, it was
extremely not subtle in a very

568
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:08,520
Adam Sandler kind of way.
But, you know, I, I, I remember,

569
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:12,600
I think I was maybe 1615 or 16
years old and I was in my room.

570
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:15,280
It was like 9 to 10:00 PM
Saturday night and I'm just

571
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:19,200
bawling my eyes out and, and,
and I was like, I don't want

572
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:20,880
that to happen to me.
I don't want that to happen to

573
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:22,240
me.
But time is something I always

574
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:25,920
had, I think, since one of my
biggest fears in general in life

575
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:29,720
is that I'm going to run out of
time before I do everything I

576
00:32:29,720 --> 00:32:32,560
want to do.
And so I try to cram everything

577
00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:38,720
in all the time, which leads to
burnout a lot.

578
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:45,160
But I'm learning to balance that
and change the mentality that by

579
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:48,400
burning out, I'm actually
holding myself back longer than

580
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:52,600
if I just let myself go a little
easier, you know, while I'm

581
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:56,840
going and.
Also, being in the moment, you

582
00:32:56,840 --> 00:33:00,600
know it's right.
It's like always being behind

583
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:02,960
the camera, capturing the
perfect moment.

584
00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:05,120
But the moment came and went,
yes.

585
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:07,400
Yes, and you.
Present.

586
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:08,840
That's right.
That's right.

587
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:12,840
I've noticed that, yeah, the
last, the last probably 2 1/2

588
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:15,440
few months of my life had been,
had been like that.

589
00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:22,400
And I hear and I, I guess it's a
good thing to talk about.

590
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:24,280
And I think that it's really
important and relatable.

591
00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,360
And I think that a lot of people
have this, you know, have this

592
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:30,760
feeling too.
So I don't even feel like I even

593
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:34,920
can cut anything out to like
make my, to be, I don't know

594
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:37,640
where to be even begin to make
myself be more present in the

595
00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:39,880
moment.
You know, like I think that

596
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:43,520
being in the moment requires
effort, right.

597
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,800
But if you're burnt out because
you're expanding all your effort

598
00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:50,080
on other things, but I just
don't know what to cut out.

599
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:52,200
I can't cut out being a husband.
I can't cut out working.

600
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:54,680
I can't cut out being a dad, you
know, I can't cut out being

601
00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:56,280
healthy and exercising, you
know?

602
00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:59,960
So like, it's, I think I
understand why a lot of people

603
00:33:59,960 --> 00:34:02,240
feel that way, you know?
Yeah.

604
00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:04,800
And and I think again, it's
being, it's you've got to be

605
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:08,400
gentle on yourself and be calm
to yourself and prioritize like

606
00:34:08,520 --> 00:34:11,320
everything you want to do to
have to do it today.

607
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:16,080
You know, can you space it out?
I know a little while ago when

608
00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:19,880
you and I had a chat, you said
Shabbos is such a special time

609
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:24,920
for you because it's your time
to connect with your family and

610
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:27,480
your community and spend time
together.

611
00:34:27,840 --> 00:34:33,480
And if 124 hour period in a week
affords you that, you're a rich

612
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:35,800
man you.
Think so.

613
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:40,520
Absolutely right.
People live in the same home.

614
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:45,159
People can go days and weeks
without talking, just the

615
00:34:45,159 --> 00:34:49,719
mundanities of life and, and,
and, and, you know, your Shabbos

616
00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:54,400
gives you an opportunity to, to
really, really connect to the

617
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:57,680
deeper level because you're not
watching TV, you're not on

618
00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:01,160
social media, You're not, you're
not doing anything but being

619
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:03,760
present with the people around
you, having great conversations,

620
00:35:03,760 --> 00:35:09,120
playing games together, sharing
memories, you know, talking

621
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:11,280
about family times and things
like that.

622
00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:13,440
It's, it's a special time.
Yeah.

623
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:15,080
Yeah.
So that in.

624
00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:19,640
Itself is a great thing and and
we do busy our lives and you

625
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:21,920
know, like you said, you've got
Instacart now you can order the

626
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:25,200
meal and get to spend time and
bath your baby and put him to

627
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:27,720
bed at night, right?
And if you go to grocery

628
00:35:27,720 --> 00:35:29,520
shopping, you wouldn't be able
to do that.

629
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:33,400
So I think it's about also
picking and choosing where your

630
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:36,840
priorities actually lie.
And you don't have to do

631
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:41,240
everything every day.
It's some things that you can

632
00:35:41,240 --> 00:35:43,920
just skim a little bit of, but
not when it comes to your health

633
00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:45,880
and well-being.
You know that would be a

634
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,640
priority they.
Want to talk about that a little

635
00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:50,360
bit should we talk about health
and well-being a little bit

636
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,280
sure, sure.
Well, why don't you, why don't

637
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:56,120
you lead the way of what you
think a typical healthy day for

638
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,240
the average Joe should be?
Or you could tell me about your

639
00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:01,840
healthy day that you that your
ideal healthy day.

640
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:05,240
So.
For me, my my typical healthy

641
00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:09,960
day is waking up from a good
night's sleep, right?

642
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:13,520
And for me, that's your.
Your good day starts the

643
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:16,320
previous night.
Exactly right.

644
00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:18,720
Because it sets the tempo for my
day.

645
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:22,840
If I've had a good night's sleep
and I've had good recovery, I

646
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:26,800
wake up, I'm I'm feeling
energized, I'm feeling motivated

647
00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:32,200
and I'll have some of my
supplements and water and a good

648
00:36:32,200 --> 00:36:34,240
cup of coffee and I'll go down
to what supplements.

649
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:36,480
Do you take like vitamins I
take?

650
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:42,520
Vitamins, I have a lot of them.
Well, I've got a few of my

651
00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:47,640
toolbox that I do like to take
Yeah, I take vitamins and I take

652
00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:51,720
some supplements.
I really like rehydrate and one

653
00:36:51,720 --> 00:36:56,600
of my favorite bean elements.
I find that it really boosts me.

654
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,880
I I did you feel a tangible.
Difference in your day when you

655
00:36:59,880 --> 00:37:02,080
started with elements or not
completely.

656
00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:06,600
Really, I really, really do.
I, I think that balance of, of

657
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:11,240
sodium and, and the electrolytes
and everything just it fuels my

658
00:37:11,240 --> 00:37:14,840
body, it nourishes my body.
It definitely helps me with

659
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,720
focus and it gives me energy.
So if I.

660
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:21,200
If I were to wake up right, I,
I, I like, I prefer to jog in

661
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:22,920
the morning, especially this
time of year, right.

662
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:24,400
It's well.
Outside.

663
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,680
You know, so it's either early
morning or late at late at

664
00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:32,800
night, I wake up, I roll over,
have a cup of water with

665
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:37,280
elements in it.
And immediately it's good.

666
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,920
You know, I'm energized for my
run or I, I, I, I feel like I'm

667
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:44,560
like it has an immediate impact
on my overall performance.

668
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,920
Mm Hmm.
Yeah, you feel that way.

669
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:48,920
Because I mean, I feel that way.
No, no, I haven't.

670
00:37:48,920 --> 00:37:50,760
Taken element before actually.
I'm asking.

671
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:52,280
No, I'm asking.
Yeah, I'm asking.

672
00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:55,200
Yeah, absolutely.
So I definitely do.

673
00:37:57,200 --> 00:38:00,360
It technically energizes me.
I, I feel like my body's

674
00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:02,800
nourished enough for me to go
out and train in the morning,

675
00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:06,760
whether to run with I'm doing
strength training, whether I'm

676
00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:11,920
just going for a walk, whatever
I do for me, it definitely

677
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,520
works.
So I'll wake up, I'll do that,

678
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:20,360
I'll have my coffee with my
collagen in it and I'll go for a

679
00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:24,200
workout with, as I said, that's
strength training, a run on the

680
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:27,760
bike, whatever I'm going to do.
I just love the process of

681
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:30,520
moving my body.
I love feeling strong.

682
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:34,200
I love feeling vibrant.
So having a good workout.

683
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:38,120
And I'm also at the stage in my
life where if I can only get 20

684
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:40,720
minutes in or 30 minutes in
today, it's good enough.

685
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:45,880
I'd rather go do that than not
do anything, you know, come back

686
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:49,280
and take a shower and have a
good protein rich meal.

687
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:57,200
For me, protein is really the
the food that sustains me and I

688
00:38:57,200 --> 00:39:01,960
feel it builds muscle.
For me it and it just give a

689
00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:04,040
big.
Breakfast, a Big Breakfast or a

690
00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:06,520
medium sized breakfast or like
or do you have a big lunch?

691
00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:09,040
How do you how do you space out
your meals so.

692
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:14,920
Typically I have three meals a
day and I eat like a king for

693
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:18,080
breakfast for lunch and a pauper
for dinner.

694
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:21,320
And yeah, I'm least hungry by
the end of the day.

695
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:25,400
And the the beginning part of
the day is I'm like super

696
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:27,560
hungry.
And if I get the right macros in

697
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:30,360
in the morning, I'm golden for
the day.

698
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:32,880
If I don't eat rats in the
morning, the rest of the day.

699
00:39:33,400 --> 00:39:35,640
Eggs.
Yogurts, you know, stuff like

700
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:36,720
that.
So no I.

701
00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:42,160
I pretty much eat more of AI
love smoothies with like chia

702
00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:46,960
seeds and flax seeds in it and
good protein powder nut butter.

703
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:50,040
So fiber, you know, fat fiber,
protein.

704
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:53,920
I get all of that in in and I
found that that satiates me.

705
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:59,080
And then lunch is always a
protein and vegetables and and

706
00:39:59,080 --> 00:40:03,280
dinner again, something lighter,
but protein and and vegetable

707
00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:06,320
heavy for me.
So I choose that it works for

708
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:09,440
me.
It sustains my muscles.

709
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:13,560
It it helps me with with muscle
growth, especially being I'm in

710
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:17,560
my 50s.
So you know, for a woman to to

711
00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:22,400
protect her body as she gets
older and for a man as well, you

712
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:25,720
need protein, you need strong
bones, you need strong muscles.

713
00:40:25,720 --> 00:40:27,920
You've got to be able to carry
your body weight.

714
00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:32,560
And your your nutrition feeds
into that.

715
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:34,600
I'm very much eating the
rainbow.

716
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:39,600
I don't, I don't subscribe to
processed foods at all.

717
00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:43,080
I don't, yeah, I don't do
processed foods.

718
00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:45,600
I try and limit sugar as much as
possible.

719
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:48,280
I do read labels.
I'm one of those people that you

720
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:48,960
ever get.
Sick.

721
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:56,120
Thank God, not often.
I'm, I'm healthy and and and I

722
00:40:56,120 --> 00:41:00,640
monitor my my, my metabolic
health very, very closely.

723
00:41:00,720 --> 00:41:02,840
Oh, do you?
Yeah, I really do.

724
00:41:03,160 --> 00:41:06,280
And how do you do?
That how does someone measure

725
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:08,520
their how does someone keep
track of their metabolic health

726
00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:11,720
so.
I use I have a functional

727
00:41:11,720 --> 00:41:15,880
medicine doctor, so I prefer to
go down that route than than a

728
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:19,480
traditional doctor.
I like to understand the science

729
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:22,360
behind things and I, I love to
understand how my body is

730
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:25,520
working and almost have a
helicopter view, not just

731
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,720
looking at, I've come in with a
sore throat.

732
00:41:27,720 --> 00:41:29,360
Well, here we go.
Off you go.

733
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:32,280
You know, I kind of want to
understand the whole ecosystem

734
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:35,760
of my body.
So I have my bloods done every

735
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:40,640
six months, OK.
And I use a company called

736
00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:44,680
function Health and they they
put it in the dashboard for me

737
00:41:44,680 --> 00:41:47,160
and I'm able to track and
monitor you sound like.

738
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:51,000
A Huberman advertisement element
and function and everything like

739
00:41:51,040 --> 00:41:52,080
that.
I don't know.

740
00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:54,840
Well, I'm I'm not trying to.
Be.

741
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:56,400
I know it's.
Excellent.

742
00:41:56,440 --> 00:41:58,200
I think it's amazing.
It's amazing that you keep track

743
00:41:58,200 --> 00:42:02,560
of all this because I think that
I noticed.

744
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:06,480
I want you to continue to suck.
I just noticed that when you

745
00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:09,040
hear at first about everything
that you're doing, it's the most

746
00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:14,960
overwhelming thing in the world.
And I think that in reality,

747
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:17,440
it's just, if you just think I
just want to be a little bit

748
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:18,840
healthier today than I was
yesterday.

749
00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:20,680
And like you just live every day
like that.

750
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:23,800
You kind of find that you kind
of fall into a general pattern

751
00:42:23,800 --> 00:42:25,080
that's pretty easy to maintain
anyway.

752
00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:28,160
Like I'm sure you don't think
very much about how difficult

753
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:31,160
your routine is to maintain
while you're doing it every day

754
00:42:31,160 --> 00:42:33,120
all the time.
You're like, this is what I

755
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:34,600
like, I love to do this and it
feels good.

756
00:42:34,600 --> 00:42:35,880
And you know you're being
healthy and taking care of

757
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:37,520
yourself.
Absolutely.

758
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:40,800
And you know, I think if you
want anything in life, the hard

759
00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:43,720
work's never the hard part,
right?

760
00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:47,760
It's committing to it.
And I often tell people it's

761
00:42:47,760 --> 00:42:50,400
progress over perfection.
Don't be hard on yourself.

762
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:53,400
I was having a chat with the
gentleman yesterday and he was

763
00:42:53,400 --> 00:42:58,400
saying, well, I lost 90 lbs two
years ago, and then two weeks

764
00:42:58,400 --> 00:43:01,160
ago I started again.
But then I remember when I lost

765
00:43:01,160 --> 00:43:04,160
the 90 lbs, the one night I had
a peanut butter and Jelly

766
00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:07,200
sandwich.
And then I fell off the wagon

767
00:43:07,240 --> 00:43:11,480
and I said, and he said, well
then I let the wagon roll away

768
00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:14,080
and I said, and he said, and
then I just let it all go.

769
00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:16,520
And I said, why?
Why didn't you just enjoy the

770
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:19,760
peanut butter and Jelly sandwich
and your next meal get back on

771
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:23,320
it?
And I, I do feel that people are

772
00:43:23,320 --> 00:43:27,480
very hard on themselves and if
they're not committed 105,000%

773
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:30,120
then it's just not good enough.
And so then why even do it?

774
00:43:30,640 --> 00:43:34,600
And it's as you say, and every
day just committing to being

775
00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:37,120
healthier is, is what I strive
for.

776
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:41,920
So I don't see it as as work,
but I see the benefits in my

777
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:45,280
body and, and where I'm at at my
age and where I want to go.

778
00:43:45,480 --> 00:43:48,080
And I want to I want to age
young so.

779
00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:51,520
I think, I think and there's no
doubt you will, right?

780
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:54,200
I mean, I can't imagine
anything.

781
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:57,600
I mean, and you go the rest of
your day, the rest of this ideal

782
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:00,840
healthy day, but nothing in this
says you shouldn't be running

783
00:44:00,840 --> 00:44:02,360
around.
So you're 110 years, you know,

784
00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:05,320
110 years old if you keep doing
this, you know, I mean, as long

785
00:44:05,360 --> 00:44:06,080
as.
You're healthy.

786
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:08,520
I mean, there's no point
watching 110 if you're not

787
00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:09,560
healthy.
Right, right.

788
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:14,640
So my grandfather was 92 or
three and he was walking 3 or 4

789
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:16,480
miles a day.
He lived alone, took care of

790
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:22,960
himself, cleaned, cleaned the
house himself and, and you know,

791
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:26,200
and he just always took care and
he always ate like he was never

792
00:44:26,200 --> 00:44:28,440
crazy about anything.
He's always ate clean and very

793
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,000
simple and went for his walks
and took care of everything and

794
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:34,600
did jumping jacks.
And 9293 was just totally,

795
00:44:34,600 --> 00:44:37,320
totally healthy.
So I can't imagine that like

796
00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:41,120
living, you know, avoiding
processed foods, moving around,

797
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:45,240
you know, by the way, taking
vitamins is something I like, I

798
00:44:45,240 --> 00:44:46,880
started, I started doing it.
I look forward to it.

799
00:44:46,880 --> 00:44:50,360
Like I'm excited about it.
And I feel I've never felt older

800
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:52,600
than when I say that, but like
it's true.

801
00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:56,040
And like, you know, like I, I
take vitamin D and vitamin C and

802
00:44:56,080 --> 00:45:01,080
iron and, and it's actually
probably one of the things I

803
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:06,800
feel like talk about how, how
you actually feel the impact.

804
00:45:07,160 --> 00:45:11,080
I've combated getting sick so
many times in the last month,

805
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:14,360
month and 1/2 with just making
sure to get a good night's

806
00:45:14,360 --> 00:45:16,280
sleep.
You know, like when I really

807
00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:18,960
feel like the waves about to
crash down on me, I get a good

808
00:45:18,960 --> 00:45:21,160
night's sleep.
I take the, you know, I take, I

809
00:45:21,160 --> 00:45:24,400
take my vitamins every day and I
get, you know, I get outside to

810
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:28,480
get some fresh air and it just
pushes it off and pushes it off

811
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:30,960
and it slowly, slowly recedes
each day and then you're back to

812
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:32,000
normal again.
It's crazy.

813
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:36,520
It's really amazing.
And, and again, you taking care

814
00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:39,560
of yourself, you're listening to
your body, you're getting sleep,

815
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:42,040
you're getting outside, you're
getting natural sunlight, you're

816
00:45:42,040 --> 00:45:45,480
getting fresh air and you're
listening to your body.

817
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:48,800
And especially at your stage,
it's very, very challenging

818
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:53,240
because your kids are so young.
So they coming home with

819
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:58,840
especially the the older one.
I'm sure he's in Krish in play

820
00:45:58,840 --> 00:46:01,560
school.
So he's he's coming home with

821
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:03,640
all the bugs.
So your immune system is is

822
00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:06,480
farting as much as his little
immune system is.

823
00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:12,080
So to keep yourself healthy is
is amazing and well.

824
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:14,840
I'm not going to work, you know
you're doing.

825
00:46:15,240 --> 00:46:18,560
We can carry on.
Yeah, protecting our guts and,

826
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:21,080
and, and building our immunity
is critical.

827
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:25,760
And exercising, moving our
bodies is a gift and it's a

828
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:29,160
superpower, you know.
So if you can carry on doing all

829
00:46:29,160 --> 00:46:32,960
those things and and throwing in
some extra things, if you have

830
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:36,360
access to a sauna or to a cold
plunge or just standing under a

831
00:46:36,360 --> 00:46:38,640
cold shower, do you do that?
You do.

832
00:46:38,640 --> 00:46:40,720
You saw it on Cold Plunge.
I do.

833
00:46:40,720 --> 00:46:43,400
I do.
I used to be a lot better at

834
00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:48,560
cold plunging, but my body
absolutely loves the heat, so I

835
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:52,200
really go for the heat.
I love.

836
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:57,720
I love the detox, the
detoxification of a sauna.

837
00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:00,960
I love the muscle recovery that
I feel when I'm in the sauna.

838
00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:02,840
I feel like relaxed.
I know it's good for me.

839
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:07,720
Cardiovascular and, and if the
red light therapy's in there, I

840
00:47:07,720 --> 00:47:11,840
know it's good for my skin and
you know, so I love that kind of

841
00:47:11,840 --> 00:47:13,680
thing.
The cold's amazing as well, the

842
00:47:13,680 --> 00:47:17,720
rush of endorphins and if you've
got aches and pains, it's, it's

843
00:47:17,720 --> 00:47:21,080
really great for bringing down
inflammatory, your inflammation

844
00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:23,560
in your body.
So all those different

845
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:27,960
modalities just play into that
whole ecosystem of living a

846
00:47:27,960 --> 00:47:31,520
healthy life.
You know, none of them are 100%

847
00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:35,520
essential, that if you can throw
them in, they're great.

848
00:47:36,160 --> 00:47:39,520
Yeah.
So when you're coaching people

849
00:47:42,760 --> 00:47:45,400
all this, it's so funny because
all this sounds like a lot and I

850
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:47,880
understand where you're
everyone, everyone in the

851
00:47:47,880 --> 00:47:49,720
world's coming from.
Because I was this way, my, my

852
00:47:49,720 --> 00:47:52,760
wife kind of got on the like, I
always wanted to be healthy.

853
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:55,800
About two years ago, a year and
a half ago, I went to the doctor

854
00:47:56,320 --> 00:48:00,680
and I'm 64 and they're like give
out and they're like you're

855
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:04,240
about, you're 225.
You're just, you're just on the

856
00:48:04,240 --> 00:48:08,560
edge of overweight.
I just there and like just below

857
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:09,480
it.
But like you're vet, you're

858
00:48:09,480 --> 00:48:11,400
close to it.
And so I was like, you know, I

859
00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:13,720
just want to be healthy.
I don't need to be in perfect

860
00:48:13,720 --> 00:48:14,640
shape.
I don't need to be anything

861
00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:15,800
crazy.
I just want to be a little, I

862
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:18,800
want to be healthy.
So I started jogging and I

863
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:21,280
started just cutting out stupid
bread that I knew I didn't need.

864
00:48:21,640 --> 00:48:26,160
And then like in that, I began
getting exposed to how bad the

865
00:48:26,160 --> 00:48:28,560
processed foods that we eat in
general were.

866
00:48:28,840 --> 00:48:32,640
And I saw the almost literally,
almost immediate impact of the

867
00:48:32,640 --> 00:48:36,360
combination of jogging and just
cutting out of the processed

868
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:38,160
foods.
And I was like, this is

869
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:39,840
incredible.
And then my wife was like, well,

870
00:48:39,840 --> 00:48:43,160
we used to go for get rid of
our, our seed oils.

871
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:45,240
And I'm like, I don't know about
that.

872
00:48:45,240 --> 00:48:47,960
And she was like, I used to get
he used to get rid of your beer.

873
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:49,520
And I'm like, I don't know about
that.

874
00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:54,440
I used to take vitamins and
like, and each step along the

875
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:57,160
way I was like, you're going to,
you know, this is just going a

876
00:48:57,160 --> 00:48:59,000
little too far.
It's a little too crazy, you

877
00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:01,080
know, for me.
And then every single time,

878
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:03,520
like, but I always feel better
and like there's always

879
00:49:03,520 --> 00:49:05,480
something I like I want to do.
And I'm like, wait a minute,

880
00:49:05,720 --> 00:49:09,000
when I feel so much better, I
have more energy to do more

881
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,000
things.
I'm always running around and

882
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:15,440
like, I, you know, again, I
teach, I, I teach, I do sales, I

883
00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:18,000
do the podcast.
I, I'm part of my community.

884
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:20,800
I, I, I go to synagogue 323
times a day.

885
00:49:21,240 --> 00:49:24,960
I, you know, I'm, I'm constantly
on the go and I need every

886
00:49:24,960 --> 00:49:29,320
advantage I can get, you know,
so like, and so I, I stopped

887
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:31,160
even thinking about it like
crazy or not.

888
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:33,560
And I'm just thinking like, oh,
how can I be better?

889
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:37,040
Like, how can, how, how can this
help me get, you know, even

890
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:38,520
better and even better than
before?

891
00:49:39,640 --> 00:49:44,560
So I think that that's great for
me to have realized that.

892
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:47,520
But for a lot of people
especially that need a or want a

893
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:51,920
coach or like incentivize to get
a coach, I could imagine that

894
00:49:52,720 --> 00:49:57,080
it's a uphill battle for you
right to convince them to to

895
00:49:57,080 --> 00:50:00,720
start changing their their ways,
especially if they don't want to

896
00:50:00,720 --> 00:50:02,440
do it themselves to begin with
necessarily.

897
00:50:03,440 --> 00:50:07,160
So, you know, people that come
looking for coach actually do

898
00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:11,360
want to make a change.
They don't have the time to just

899
00:50:12,040 --> 00:50:15,400
chat to somebody for the sake of
chatting it chatting to them.

900
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:20,280
And you know that one small
change leads to the next change,

901
00:50:20,280 --> 00:50:23,320
which leads to the next change.
And before you realize what

902
00:50:23,320 --> 00:50:27,960
you're doing, you're, you're in
the ecosystem of becoming

903
00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:29,720
healthier and healthier and
healthier.

904
00:50:30,080 --> 00:50:34,480
And as you start feeling
stronger and healthier and more

905
00:50:34,480 --> 00:50:37,560
capable, and you feel like
you're making the right

906
00:50:37,560 --> 00:50:41,320
decisions for your body and you
can see the results thereof,

907
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:46,040
there's nothing stopping them,
right?

908
00:50:46,440 --> 00:50:50,640
But it's it's helping them to to
break those limiting beliefs

909
00:50:50,640 --> 00:50:53,400
that exactly like that gentleman
yesterday.

910
00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:55,360
Well, if I had one bad meal,
that's it.

911
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:56,680
It's broken.
I can't carry out.

912
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:59,320
Well, of course you can.
You're bigger than that, right?

913
00:50:59,600 --> 00:51:02,520
So it's helping breaking.
Well, I only get to this and

914
00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:05,680
then I revert back and I put on
those 20 lbs again, breaking

915
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:10,280
those limiting beliefs, helping
them to understand how to read a

916
00:51:10,280 --> 00:51:13,440
label, a simple thing like a
label, if it's got, if you can't

917
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:16,160
pronounce it, you shouldn't put
it in your body, right?

918
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:19,080
That's one of the most.
Sad things that I ever started

919
00:51:19,080 --> 00:51:21,440
doing and it makes everything so
much more challenging.

920
00:51:21,440 --> 00:51:25,440
It's so hard.
But but we put things in in our

921
00:51:25,440 --> 00:51:29,360
bodies that that are almost
nuclear factor level.

922
00:51:29,360 --> 00:51:33,480
I mean, yeah, yeah.
And and so when you start

923
00:51:33,480 --> 00:51:37,440
helping people to to break these
limiting beliefs, you help

924
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:41,680
educate them on what they want,
understanding what they want,

925
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,920
and then helping them to take
the steps towards it.

926
00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:48,200
And they start seeing the
results and they start making

927
00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:51,880
themselves a priority.
Like your wife said, I'm making

928
00:51:51,880 --> 00:51:54,800
myself a priority.
Why don't we do this?

929
00:51:54,960 --> 00:51:59,240
And you, you, you got on the
program and together you almost

930
00:51:59,240 --> 00:52:01,680
accountability coaches to each
other, right?

931
00:52:02,400 --> 00:52:05,640
Yeah.
Yes or no?

932
00:52:07,240 --> 00:52:09,760
Well, I wouldn't say to each
other, but I, I have an

933
00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:13,000
accountability coach, yes.
So, you know, you got an

934
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:16,720
accountability coach and that's
what helps you and the decisions

935
00:52:16,720 --> 00:52:20,040
that you're making and, and the
progress that you're making is

936
00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:22,160
going to impact your children's
lives as well.

937
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:26,960
So when somebody comes and they
start making these changes and,

938
00:52:26,960 --> 00:52:29,600
and they feel empowered and they
feel like they're really making

939
00:52:29,600 --> 00:52:33,480
a difference and the metrics
start changing and, and they're

940
00:52:33,480 --> 00:52:35,520
feeling vibrant and they're
feeling healthier.

941
00:52:35,560 --> 00:52:37,160
They want to go to the next
level.

942
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:41,160
But people do need to be held
accountable and people do need a

943
00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:44,840
sounding board and then letting
them know that they need to self

944
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:48,240
advocate.
So if you, if you're unwell and

945
00:52:48,240 --> 00:52:51,560
you are going to the doctor and
you're seeking medical help,

946
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:55,160
educate yourself.
Go and do the research, go and

947
00:52:55,240 --> 00:52:58,400
ask questions.
It helps with you getting to

948
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:00,920
know your body.
It helps getting to know whether

949
00:53:00,920 --> 00:53:04,880
the person that is taking care
of your health alongside you is

950
00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:09,800
as invested in you as you are.
And so there's so many different

951
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:12,040
levels to the coaching that's
interesting.

952
00:53:12,240 --> 00:53:15,800
That's a really, really that
last sentence that you just

953
00:53:15,800 --> 00:53:17,280
said.
Make sure the person that is

954
00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:20,000
across from you is as invested
in your health as you are.

955
00:53:20,720 --> 00:53:24,480
That's, that's the entire,
that's people's entire problem

956
00:53:24,480 --> 00:53:27,680
with the medical world today is
that we don't feel like that's

957
00:53:27,680 --> 00:53:30,960
the case or people are losing
trust in the fact that's the

958
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:33,600
case.
Yep, exactly.

959
00:53:36,320 --> 00:53:41,720
Thanks to to find that person.
And it's OK if you change a

960
00:53:41,720 --> 00:53:44,800
doctor and a doctor and a doctor
and doctor.

961
00:53:44,800 --> 00:53:48,480
You keep changing until you find
that person that is as invested

962
00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:53,680
in you as you are in yourself.
Because together you got to

963
00:53:53,680 --> 00:53:58,840
navigate the rest of your life
right, and you've got to make

964
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:00,720
the right decisions for your
health.

965
00:54:02,400 --> 00:54:07,280
Yeah, I was talking to a doctor.
I'll send you the episode that I

966
00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:09,240
did with her.
I think I told you about this.

967
00:54:09,240 --> 00:54:14,440
I think we talked about this
Allison Lovett and and and we're

968
00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:17,240
saying that you need, you know,
I think you should have a doctor

969
00:54:17,240 --> 00:54:19,440
of of health and a doctor of
medicine.

970
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:22,560
You know, you have a doctor of,
of someone that could prescribe

971
00:54:22,560 --> 00:54:26,320
you, you know, medications, you
know, for when you do need it

972
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:28,320
because we, there obviously is a
need for that.

973
00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:31,640
But a doctor of health is
someone that cares about your

974
00:54:31,640 --> 00:54:33,360
health as much as they care as
much as you do.

975
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:36,040
And someone that wants to be,
you know, like one of the things

976
00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:39,840
that my grandfather, who was AGI
for many, many years, one of the

977
00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:43,040
things that he lamented towards
the end of his life was that he

978
00:54:43,040 --> 00:54:46,480
was, he lived, he one of the,
one of the things he loved about

979
00:54:46,480 --> 00:54:48,400
being a doctor was his
relationship to his patients.

980
00:54:48,920 --> 00:54:51,400
And towards the end of his
career, the, the hospital,

981
00:54:51,400 --> 00:54:54,680
wouldn't, you know, and
obviously they have to protect

982
00:54:54,680 --> 00:54:57,720
themselves.
Lawsuits all the time, every

983
00:54:57,720 --> 00:55:00,280
day, every minute of every day.
I totally, I, I, I, I, I

984
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:02,720
wouldn't know what to do if I
were on, if I were their size.

985
00:55:03,120 --> 00:55:04,640
Maybe the answer is not to get
to their size.

986
00:55:04,640 --> 00:55:07,840
I don't know.
But you know, but he, he would

987
00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:09,880
lament and he's like, you know,
now I can't even, I'm not even

988
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:11,680
allowed to know who my, I barely
know.

989
00:55:11,720 --> 00:55:14,640
My patients can't contact me,
you know, like I, I'm not

990
00:55:14,640 --> 00:55:18,200
allowed to go see them if, if
I'm not the doctor on call, he's

991
00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:19,920
like, and then they end up
having to explain this.

992
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:22,320
And imagine having to explain
yourself, your medical history

993
00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:25,920
to someone 10 times in 10 years
or five years.

994
00:55:26,280 --> 00:55:27,800
And what if you forget
something?

995
00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:29,360
What if one doctor knows you
better?

996
00:55:29,360 --> 00:55:31,560
It's like, oh, wait, didn't you
used to smoke 10 years ago?

997
00:55:31,560 --> 00:55:33,720
And you just, you know, you
forgot to bring that up or, you

998
00:55:33,720 --> 00:55:35,800
know, didn't you say that you
started taking XY and Z and

999
00:55:35,800 --> 00:55:38,200
like, oh, right, right, right.
But you don't have that

1000
00:55:38,200 --> 00:55:39,800
opportunity.
So many people fall through the

1001
00:55:39,800 --> 00:55:43,320
cracks otherwise, you know, and
so I think that a doctor of

1002
00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:46,680
health would be I guess that's
what you call health coach, you

1003
00:55:46,680 --> 00:55:50,240
know, I mean, it's really what
what you what you'd want, I

1004
00:55:50,240 --> 00:55:53,280
guess, But I think that they
should be way more regular for a

1005
00:55:53,280 --> 00:55:54,960
lot of people.
So I mean a.

1006
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:59,480
Lot of doctors now do work or
having their practices and

1007
00:55:59,480 --> 00:56:01,600
health coaches for that exact
reason.

1008
00:56:01,600 --> 00:56:02,840
Yeah, we do.
It's Yeah.

1009
00:56:03,400 --> 00:56:06,200
You know, people just don't want
a script, right?

1010
00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:10,480
You want to understand what can
you do alongside that script or

1011
00:56:10,480 --> 00:56:14,200
without that script in place to
get to your health goals.

1012
00:56:14,720 --> 00:56:18,920
And to your point, doctors, it's
become like a sausage machine.

1013
00:56:19,120 --> 00:56:21,840
They have to see X amount of
patients and there's so many

1014
00:56:21,840 --> 00:56:25,520
barriers in place for you to
build a natural rapport with

1015
00:56:25,520 --> 00:56:27,520
that doctor.
So it's very, very difficult.

1016
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:32,720
But that doesn't negate the fact
that the doctor, when he is

1017
00:56:32,720 --> 00:56:37,640
sitting or she's sitting across
from you, listens to you and it

1018
00:56:37,760 --> 00:56:40,960
asks you to self advocate and
allows you to question and not

1019
00:56:40,960 --> 00:56:42,760
just be dogmatical.
This is, but we don't.

1020
00:56:42,760 --> 00:56:45,600
Have, I don't think we have a
lot of either unfortunately, or

1021
00:56:45,600 --> 00:56:48,480
at least in the States, because
in the states, the health crisis

1022
00:56:48,480 --> 00:56:53,240
being the way that it is, I
would, and I don't, I don't, I,

1023
00:56:53,360 --> 00:56:56,120
I'm not, I don't want to make
you even seem a little bit like

1024
00:56:56,120 --> 00:56:58,320
I'm putting any kind of blame on
anybody in this scenario.

1025
00:56:58,320 --> 00:57:01,920
But the way that we, you know,
especially myself, the way I

1026
00:57:01,960 --> 00:57:06,200
think about a doctor is I have a
body and a doctor is a personal

1027
00:57:06,200 --> 00:57:09,360
mechanic, you know, And so like,
you know, if my arm hurts, then

1028
00:57:09,360 --> 00:57:11,600
like I go to the doctor and he
gives me something and makes my

1029
00:57:11,600 --> 00:57:13,120
arm feel better.
And then I move on with my life.

1030
00:57:13,120 --> 00:57:15,480
And like, I don't think about
why my arm hurt.

1031
00:57:15,480 --> 00:57:17,080
I don't think about what happens
after.

1032
00:57:17,080 --> 00:57:18,880
I don't think how long, what the
medication is.

1033
00:57:18,880 --> 00:57:21,760
I'm like, he's a doctor.
It's his job to be a personal

1034
00:57:21,760 --> 00:57:24,040
mechanic.
And I'm there, you know, And so

1035
00:57:24,440 --> 00:57:30,120
I spent most, I spent 2827 years
of my life not thinking about,

1036
00:57:30,320 --> 00:57:33,800
you know, doctors as anything
but people, mechanics.

1037
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:36,640
And I think that a lot of a lot
of people in this country think

1038
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:40,160
about them like that.
And so the question I think that

1039
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:43,480
you, I don't think a lot of
people are coming at going to a

1040
00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:48,720
doctor from a place of is this
maintenance for my body as

1041
00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:52,120
opposed to like, I just need a
quick fix and like this is

1042
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:53,720
inconvenient for me.
So I want to be in and out of

1043
00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:55,320
here and be better tomorrow
because I have to go back to

1044
00:57:55,320 --> 00:57:57,520
work and take care of my kids or
whatever, you know.

1045
00:57:57,520 --> 00:57:59,240
And so I think that's what the I
think that's a bit.

1046
00:57:59,240 --> 00:58:02,360
And so even doctors that would
be willing to listen, you know,

1047
00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:05,080
aren't even getting clientele or
patients that are even sitting

1048
00:58:05,080 --> 00:58:08,480
in and opening up to them
necessarily, you know, well, I

1049
00:58:08,480 --> 00:58:10,600
think.
You know, a lot of people have

1050
00:58:10,600 --> 00:58:16,120
shifted to functional meds and
doctors looking for that more

1051
00:58:16,120 --> 00:58:18,640
holistic and whole body
approach.

1052
00:58:19,160 --> 00:58:22,280
I hope so, yeah.
I mean, I see a lot of people

1053
00:58:22,280 --> 00:58:26,200
and people that haven't are very
curious and are looking into it

1054
00:58:26,200 --> 00:58:28,040
and and are wanting to
understand it more.

1055
00:58:28,520 --> 00:58:32,720
And there's a place for
traditional doctors.

1056
00:58:32,840 --> 00:58:34,720
Absolutely.
They save lives.

1057
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:39,560
They they are an an incredibly
important pillar of our society.

1058
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:43,760
But you don't go into a doctor's
room with high cholesterol for

1059
00:58:43,760 --> 00:58:45,960
him just to give you a statin
and walk out.

1060
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:50,720
And for me, you know, that
doctor needs to be educating you

1061
00:58:50,720 --> 00:58:54,960
and making lifestyle choices,
right, about implementing

1062
00:58:55,240 --> 00:58:59,160
healthy lifestyle changes,
exercise, diet, stress

1063
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:03,640
management, breath work and
stress reduction, all these kind

1064
00:59:03,640 --> 00:59:06,760
of things.
And with the number of patients

1065
00:59:06,760 --> 00:59:09,960
doctors are having to see, they
don't have the luxury of doing

1066
00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:13,440
that.
So part of the system allows

1067
00:59:13,440 --> 00:59:17,040
them to be effective and part of
the system doesn't allow them to

1068
00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:19,080
be effective.
But those in private practice

1069
00:59:19,080 --> 00:59:23,200
need to take the time to give
the patients that kind of level

1070
00:59:23,200 --> 00:59:25,400
of treatment.
It's not about going in for

1071
00:59:25,400 --> 00:59:27,120
script.
And so if your cholesterol

1072
00:59:27,120 --> 00:59:29,760
continues to rise, what, you
just get a higher dose of

1073
00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:33,080
medication, right?
I well, I hope not, but I think

1074
00:59:33,080 --> 00:59:34,800
a lot of people think so.
So so.

1075
00:59:34,800 --> 00:59:38,880
That's my point about self
advocating, you know, is points

1076
00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:40,680
I think.
We're and we're, we're, we're

1077
00:59:40,680 --> 00:59:43,000
hitting a turning point because
people, like you said, I think

1078
00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:44,800
people are.
I think that though, where I

1079
00:59:44,800 --> 00:59:48,760
think it's funny, again, you
know, political, anything

1080
00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:54,160
political aside, RFK ran a
platform meant for presidency on

1081
00:59:54,240 --> 00:59:57,440
a platform of we're sick, we
should be healthier.

1082
00:59:57,440 --> 01:00:01,160
And like no one like it's not
about Medicaid, it's not about

1083
01:00:01,160 --> 01:00:03,440
health insurance.
It's not about like, it's not

1084
01:00:03,440 --> 01:00:06,000
about who's paying whose
insurance bills or who's paying

1085
01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:07,880
whose medical bills or whose
student loan bills.

1086
01:00:07,880 --> 01:00:12,160
He's like, our kids are sick,
we're sick, we're not healthy,

1087
01:00:12,400 --> 01:00:15,760
we need to change.
And like, again, political or

1088
01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:17,920
not any like it's just
fascinating that, that, that,

1089
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:21,000
and not even is it fascinating.
It shows that it's.

1090
01:00:21,720 --> 01:00:23,680
It's in the zeitgeist, like
people are thinking about it.

1091
01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:25,840
People are aware of that and
people's attention are brought

1092
01:00:25,840 --> 01:00:27,960
to it.
So much so that it had a

1093
01:00:28,080 --> 01:00:32,000
significant sway on, on an
election, you know, and that

1094
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:37,920
should hopefully be a we can
read the, the, the we could, we

1095
01:00:37,920 --> 01:00:39,640
could put our finger on the
pulse of the country and be

1096
01:00:39,640 --> 01:00:43,240
like, whoa, like that means
something, You know, people

1097
01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:45,960
don't want to feel like crap.
Absolutely.

1098
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:51,880
And we live in an age where so
much is available to us, right?

1099
01:00:52,320 --> 01:00:56,480
And we can, we can look into
anything we want to look into.

1100
01:00:56,480 --> 01:00:59,400
We can get as much information
as we want to.

1101
01:00:59,840 --> 01:01:05,000
Every doctor is accessible today
via podcasts, via a book, via a

1102
01:01:05,440 --> 01:01:08,400
a Ted talk, a YouTube channel,
whatever else.

1103
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:13,080
We have so much available to us
that the surprising thing is so

1104
01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:17,360
few people know where to look
that that tide is changing.

1105
01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:20,680
People are becoming more
educated and the more educated

1106
01:01:20,680 --> 01:01:24,080
people are becoming with regards
to their health and being, it's

1107
01:01:24,080 --> 01:01:29,200
a cliched term, the CEO of their
own health, the more empowered

1108
01:01:29,200 --> 01:01:33,920
they are too push towards
change, wanting change where

1109
01:01:34,160 --> 01:01:38,840
Kennedy can stand up and, and
say and do as he has and people

1110
01:01:38,840 --> 01:01:41,800
rallying behind it because
people are tired of being sick.

1111
01:01:42,120 --> 01:01:45,400
People are tired of spending the
last 20 years of their life in

1112
01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:50,560
ill health and not enjoying what
you know, the labours of, of, of

1113
01:01:50,560 --> 01:01:54,200
the fruit are.
So people are driving more and

1114
01:01:54,200 --> 01:01:57,000
more and wanting more and more
and, and the medical system is

1115
01:01:57,000 --> 01:02:01,120
going to have to change with
them because people are

1116
01:02:01,120 --> 01:02:05,080
demanding it and people.
Are also retroactive myself

1117
01:02:05,080 --> 01:02:08,080
included retroactively upset
that like this was even allowed

1118
01:02:08,080 --> 01:02:11,240
to be in the food to begin with
you know like like that that

1119
01:02:11,240 --> 01:02:14,760
that that also you know like
it's funny I I went to Trader

1120
01:02:14,760 --> 01:02:18,160
Joe's the other day and I'm you
know and I'm in AI see my

1121
01:02:18,160 --> 01:02:21,600
favorite snack and it's one of
those snacks like that survived

1122
01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:25,000
like the purge in terms of all
them but like we never examined

1123
01:02:25,000 --> 01:02:27,840
too closely because it always
like had a relatively healthy

1124
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:31,000
looking name or label and I
looked at the back and I'm like

1125
01:02:31,840 --> 01:02:34,680
oh man it hurts my heart to
think that I've been putting

1126
01:02:34,680 --> 01:02:38,720
this in my butt Oh my gosh I
know and I was like.

1127
01:02:39,560 --> 01:02:41,840
And.
You feel I felt betrayed.

1128
01:02:41,840 --> 01:02:44,640
I'm like, oh man, I thought you
were my friend.

1129
01:02:44,640 --> 01:02:47,120
I thought these like, you know,
thin men balls were like my

1130
01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:51,080
friend, you know, these were
they the Girl Scout, The Girl

1131
01:02:51,080 --> 01:02:54,760
Scout cookies in little bite
sized balls that were just like

1132
01:02:55,000 --> 01:02:56,680
you really.
Thought that was going to be

1133
01:02:56,680 --> 01:02:59,200
healthy.
You were just kidding, I

1134
01:02:59,200 --> 01:03:00,840
thought.
That if you put the word real in

1135
01:03:00,840 --> 01:03:06,480
front of it, that it works out.
Can you, can we talk a little

1136
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:08,320
bit about what it was like
growing up in South Africa?

1137
01:03:09,000 --> 01:03:11,160
Yeah.
So growing up in South Africa

1138
01:03:11,160 --> 01:03:18,920
was was it was a beautiful time.
We didn't have anything about

1139
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:20,320
the.
Country, by the way, so you

1140
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:23,800
could I, I have like I would
love to be educated about

1141
01:03:23,800 --> 01:03:26,760
generally the country overall.
So if you want to put in as much

1142
01:03:26,760 --> 01:03:29,160
commentary context for color, I
would love to hear it.

1143
01:03:29,680 --> 01:03:33,760
So South Africa is, is really a
beautiful country.

1144
01:03:34,200 --> 01:03:38,560
It's very small in comparison to
the US, but it's a very rich in

1145
01:03:38,560 --> 01:03:43,200
culture.
We, we, we had a very colonial

1146
01:03:43,200 --> 01:03:46,840
and very European influence in
South Africa.

1147
01:03:47,280 --> 01:03:54,280
And it is very, very diverse,
but in a, in a very positive

1148
01:03:54,280 --> 01:03:58,600
and, and beautiful way.
Growing up was very much farm to

1149
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:03,400
table kind of food.
I mean, we of course we went out

1150
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:06,480
for dinners, but they were to
proper restaurants and proper

1151
01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:08,880
food.
And you know, you if you wanted

1152
01:04:08,880 --> 01:04:12,160
a hamburger, you had a hamburger
at home and it was with pure

1153
01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:17,840
ground beef and and you know,
real lettuce that only lasts for

1154
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:20,600
four days in your fridge and not
for six weeks.

1155
01:04:21,560 --> 01:04:26,240
No genetically modified yet.
Growing up very it was clean

1156
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:27,920
there.
It was so food, food.

1157
01:04:27,920 --> 01:04:31,440
There was much cleaner Much.
Cleaner, much cleaner, good

1158
01:04:31,440 --> 01:04:36,360
farming practices back when I
was growing up and very good

1159
01:04:36,360 --> 01:04:39,520
quality food.
Even now when, when I do go back

1160
01:04:39,520 --> 01:04:42,760
to South Africa to visit, I'm
always taken by the quality of

1161
01:04:42,760 --> 01:04:45,680
the food.
And I mean we, we export so

1162
01:04:45,680 --> 01:04:47,640
much.
Our fruit is, is incredible.

1163
01:04:47,640 --> 01:04:52,720
Our wands are world renowned,
our mountains are Cape Town is,

1164
01:04:52,720 --> 01:04:57,720
is world renowned.
But growing up was, was, was

1165
01:04:57,720 --> 01:05:01,360
incredibly wholesome, very
diverse.

1166
01:05:01,360 --> 01:05:05,240
As I said, I, I grew up in the
apartheid era of South Africa.

1167
01:05:05,240 --> 01:05:08,040
So I was very shielded and very
privileged in, in the

1168
01:05:08,040 --> 01:05:13,920
environment that I grew up in.
And when I had my oldest son was

1169
01:05:13,920 --> 01:05:18,240
was when the tide started
turning and and democracy came

1170
01:05:18,240 --> 01:05:23,120
in and even then just an
incredibly rich country with

1171
01:05:23,120 --> 01:05:30,280
regards to resources, minerals
and and diversity of, of people.

1172
01:05:30,280 --> 01:05:32,680
So South Africa is a beautiful
country.

1173
01:05:33,000 --> 01:05:38,320
I mean, wildlife and safaris,
We, we call it going to the

1174
01:05:38,320 --> 01:05:41,800
Bush, which is something we call
it.

1175
01:05:41,960 --> 01:05:46,440
Yeah, it's we, we go to the Bush
and, and we absolutely love it.

1176
01:05:46,440 --> 01:05:49,520
And you're close to nature and
it's, it kind of feeds into what

1177
01:05:49,520 --> 01:05:52,240
I do.
You know, when you find joy and,

1178
01:05:52,240 --> 01:05:56,280
and you find beauty and it fills
your soul and it just resonates

1179
01:05:56,280 --> 01:06:00,000
with you.
Going back to South Africa doing

1180
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:04,320
that is just spectacular.
Growing up, I mean I, I really

1181
01:06:04,320 --> 01:06:07,360
had a beautiful upbringing
riding my bike in the road and

1182
01:06:07,360 --> 01:06:09,680
listening to my mother whistle
at the end of the driveway.

1183
01:06:09,680 --> 01:06:13,920
It was time to come home.
No cell phones, no, no anything,

1184
01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:16,160
just just enjoying being a
child.

1185
01:06:16,640 --> 01:06:20,560
And but when my kids were
growing up that wasn't the case.

1186
01:06:20,560 --> 01:06:22,720
They couldn't ride bicycles in
the road.

1187
01:06:23,200 --> 01:06:27,640
No, no.
So unfortunately crime is quite

1188
01:06:27,640 --> 01:06:32,640
high in South Africa and the
politics is quite challenging in

1189
01:06:32,640 --> 01:06:35,160
South Africa.
So my what capacity?

1190
01:06:35,720 --> 01:06:38,160
How's it, how's it complicated?
How's it difficult?

1191
01:06:38,520 --> 01:06:41,920
I guess I just don't know
anything about it so.

1192
01:06:42,920 --> 01:06:49,120
We went from a really strict
apartheid era where it was run

1193
01:06:49,120 --> 01:06:55,960
by the Nationalist Party to the
when Mandela came out of prison

1194
01:06:56,200 --> 01:07:00,760
and we moved over to democracy
and the ANC came into power and

1195
01:07:00,920 --> 01:07:03,960
whilst Mandela was alive, there
was so much unity.

1196
01:07:03,960 --> 01:07:06,920
I don't know if you remember the
22 in World Cup soccer.

1197
01:07:07,320 --> 01:07:09,640
The whole world descended on
South Africa.

1198
01:07:10,600 --> 01:07:16,280
It was just such a an incredible
time of happiness and positivity

1199
01:07:16,280 --> 01:07:23,240
and within 25. 30 years of that.
Yeah, so, well, not that many.

1200
01:07:23,520 --> 01:07:28,400
And so, you know, things started
changing and, and South Africa's

1201
01:07:28,400 --> 01:07:36,160
political narrative was, was,
was pretty much more 1 sided.

1202
01:07:36,400 --> 01:07:40,960
And the, this whole unity
prospect that, that we bought

1203
01:07:40,960 --> 01:07:44,240
into and believe what was going
to happen really didn't happen.

1204
01:07:44,520 --> 01:07:47,720
And these huge disparities in,
in the educational system, the

1205
01:07:47,720 --> 01:07:50,440
government based educational
system and the private school

1206
01:07:50,440 --> 01:07:55,720
educational system.
And you know, when you only need

1207
01:07:55,880 --> 01:08:01,280
a 35 or 40% pass rate to pass
the subject, you know, for me,

1208
01:08:01,280 --> 01:08:03,280
that's worrying.
You know, that's.

1209
01:08:03,640 --> 01:08:07,120
Really you you need a 35 or 40%
to pass the subject.

1210
01:08:08,280 --> 01:08:12,360
Yep, certain subjects and, and.
And that's really a problem, you

1211
01:08:12,360 --> 01:08:15,360
know, so when you start seeing
the disparities in the

1212
01:08:15,360 --> 01:08:20,479
educational systems and you
realize that my children went to

1213
01:08:20,479 --> 01:08:22,920
private schools and, and they
had the best of the best

1214
01:08:22,920 --> 01:08:26,359
education.
And the kids that come from

1215
01:08:26,359 --> 01:08:31,120
underprivileged homes get a
government education system.

1216
01:08:31,120 --> 01:08:33,240
They don't necessarily always
have books.

1217
01:08:33,560 --> 01:08:35,200
They don't have flushing
toilets.

1218
01:08:35,560 --> 01:08:39,960
They don't.
Yeah, they don't always have the

1219
01:08:39,960 --> 01:08:42,240
right number of disks for every
child.

1220
01:08:42,439 --> 01:08:46,120
Some children have to walk
kilometers and kilometers to get

1221
01:08:46,120 --> 01:08:47,920
to school and back every single
day.

1222
01:08:49,279 --> 01:08:52,439
You know, a lot of young girls
are pregnant that are still

1223
01:08:52,439 --> 01:08:55,080
trying to finish school and have
got children in daycare.

1224
01:08:55,399 --> 01:09:02,279
So it's a hard system and it's
it's a beautiful country with so

1225
01:09:02,279 --> 01:09:06,880
many amazing resources, so much
potential and people that

1226
01:09:06,880 --> 01:09:12,200
despite this set of
circumstances, smile and cannot

1227
01:09:12,200 --> 01:09:14,359
offer enough of themselves to
you.

1228
01:09:14,720 --> 01:09:19,720
And you, you come across a South
African, you will never know

1229
01:09:19,720 --> 01:09:24,319
warmth and generosity of heart
and soul as you would when you

1230
01:09:24,319 --> 01:09:30,279
come to South Africa.
So it's it's a country that is

1231
01:09:30,279 --> 01:09:34,560
just so near and dear as as I
said to to friends now living in

1232
01:09:34,560 --> 01:09:38,960
the US, my soul is in Africa, in
South Africa, my heart's here in

1233
01:09:38,960 --> 01:09:41,920
the US.
But they're two very different

1234
01:09:41,920 --> 01:09:45,240
countries and they offer two
very different things.

1235
01:09:45,240 --> 01:09:53,120
And I think as South Africa is
changing and and a coalition

1236
01:09:53,120 --> 01:09:58,000
government has come into power
now and things start balancing

1237
01:09:58,000 --> 01:10:01,680
more from a political point of
view, I think there will be some

1238
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:04,560
very positive changes.
Right now we've got a failing

1239
01:10:04,560 --> 01:10:09,600
infrastructure.
Go for major power cuts, the

1240
01:10:09,640 --> 01:10:13,120
water filtration system, major
problems with that.

1241
01:10:14,560 --> 01:10:20,520
So is it bureaucracy and or
corruption that's stopping

1242
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:22,200
cleaning that up?
Is that, is that typical?

1243
01:10:22,560 --> 01:10:24,120
I mean, it's like that in
America, right?

1244
01:10:24,120 --> 01:10:25,240
You have certain cities in
America.

1245
01:10:25,240 --> 01:10:27,320
I can't even believe that this
looks the way it does,

1246
01:10:27,560 --> 01:10:31,160
considering what we what it
could look like so easily with

1247
01:10:31,160 --> 01:10:34,720
just a swipe of a pen or a snap
of a finger, you know, snap of a

1248
01:10:34,720 --> 01:10:36,200
finger.
It could really just be like

1249
01:10:36,200 --> 01:10:37,800
that.
It feels the same way there.

1250
01:10:38,240 --> 01:10:42,240
Absolutely.
And that's why I'm saying as, as

1251
01:10:42,240 --> 01:10:47,360
the, the coalition government is
coming into place and the next

1252
01:10:47,360 --> 01:10:50,640
few elections, I think will be
very important to start

1253
01:10:50,640 --> 01:10:54,800
eradicating that kind of
behaviour and to, to get

1254
01:10:54,800 --> 01:10:56,960
infrastructure back to where it
needs to be.

1255
01:10:57,400 --> 01:11:01,520
And you, you can't have people
without electricity for days on

1256
01:11:01,520 --> 01:11:06,400
end, for 8 hours a day.
How do you feed children?

1257
01:11:06,440 --> 01:11:09,840
How do you take care of of the
aged population?

1258
01:11:09,840 --> 01:11:12,760
I mean, potholes in roads and
things like that.

1259
01:11:12,760 --> 01:11:19,040
So as a, as a, as a South
African, my, my, my hope and

1260
01:11:19,040 --> 01:11:21,960
wishes is that my pray that they
get to that point.

1261
01:11:22,000 --> 01:11:27,360
And it's showing promising the
results that it's it's moving in

1262
01:11:27,360 --> 01:11:29,960
that direction, but it's going
to take the next few elections

1263
01:11:29,960 --> 01:11:33,680
to get to that point and to get
crime under control.

1264
01:11:33,680 --> 01:11:35,720
You know, when you've got people
that are living, the vast

1265
01:11:35,720 --> 01:11:39,360
majority of the population
living under the bread line and

1266
01:11:39,360 --> 01:11:42,480
people are desperate and they do
desperate things.

1267
01:11:43,280 --> 01:11:49,360
And you know, unfortunately,
human life doesn't have a price,

1268
01:11:49,360 --> 01:11:51,800
but it has a price.
It does there.

1269
01:11:52,200 --> 01:11:56,920
I I just watched.
I just watched and then we'll go

1270
01:11:56,920 --> 01:12:00,360
back to this.
Why I don't forget it is there's

1271
01:12:00,360 --> 01:12:02,160
a show called Traffic.
Did you ever hear of it?

1272
01:12:02,160 --> 01:12:04,160
It's on Hulu.
And it's.

1273
01:12:04,520 --> 01:12:07,200
So it's a woman who's an
investigative journalist, her

1274
01:12:07,200 --> 01:12:09,120
name is Marianna Van Zeller, I
think.

1275
01:12:09,600 --> 01:12:14,680
And she and each season, I think
is like 10 or 14 episodes of

1276
01:12:14,880 --> 01:12:19,320
individual cases of underground
worlds that she investigates.

1277
01:12:20,200 --> 01:12:23,520
So she's just like fentanyl,
selling human body parts,

1278
01:12:24,080 --> 01:12:25,880
organs, Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.

1279
01:12:26,280 --> 01:12:27,880
Yeah.
And then, and then I just showed

1280
01:12:27,880 --> 01:12:31,360
my class yesterday actually,
that episode with, with, with

1281
01:12:31,360 --> 01:12:35,000
hired mercenaries.
And I, I believe it was South

1282
01:12:35,000 --> 01:12:36,800
Africa.
I think it was South Africa that

1283
01:12:36,800 --> 01:12:40,720
she went to.
She said it was like the hub of,

1284
01:12:40,920 --> 01:12:43,080
of, of where you could, where
you could find mercenaries.

1285
01:12:43,080 --> 01:12:46,840
Like, like, you ask, you call a
cab, like people who log up to

1286
01:12:46,840 --> 01:12:49,080
you say, hey, like, do you need
a hit done, you know?

1287
01:12:50,600 --> 01:12:53,560
Well, it's it's not a great
reputation to have, right?

1288
01:12:53,840 --> 01:12:57,040
No, I'm not great.
But yeah, I guess that's case in

1289
01:12:57,040 --> 01:12:58,120
point.
It's really terrible.

1290
01:12:58,120 --> 01:13:02,120
It's so sad.
It's it's crazy.

1291
01:13:02,320 --> 01:13:06,040
It's crazy to think that you got
four years ago, you came in, you

1292
01:13:06,040 --> 01:13:11,240
came to this country and like
that is like a total parallel

1293
01:13:11,240 --> 01:13:14,400
reality that like no one of this
country would even like really

1294
01:13:14,400 --> 01:13:17,800
conceive, you know, like it's so
different pinch.

1295
01:13:17,880 --> 01:13:23,200
Myself, I'll walk down the road
to dinner with a girlfriend and

1296
01:13:23,400 --> 01:13:26,080
I won't even bat an eyelid.
I could never do that in South

1297
01:13:26,080 --> 01:13:27,360
Africa.
Yeah.

1298
01:13:27,960 --> 01:13:29,520
It's amazing.
It's crazy, yeah.

1299
01:13:29,680 --> 01:13:31,200
You know I have friends.
That say the same thing on

1300
01:13:31,200 --> 01:13:33,560
Mexico too, by the way, I have
friends from Mexico that are

1301
01:13:33,560 --> 01:13:36,720
like past 6-7 PM, like if
they're going to their friend

1302
01:13:36,720 --> 01:13:38,920
down the block, they're Ubering
like they're not, they're not

1303
01:13:38,920 --> 01:13:40,560
walking alone at night.
They're not doing anything like

1304
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:42,240
that.
How did because you mentioned

1305
01:13:42,240 --> 01:13:45,680
coalitions and I don't how does
the government work there in

1306
01:13:45,680 --> 01:13:48,560
terms because I know the only
types of governments I really

1307
01:13:48,560 --> 01:13:50,960
know are how American government
works.

1308
01:13:50,960 --> 01:13:53,360
I know how the Israeli
government kind of works a

1309
01:13:53,360 --> 01:13:57,400
little bit, even though it's
also a shit show, but I do

1310
01:13:57,400 --> 01:13:58,720
understand the notion they
don't.

1311
01:13:58,920 --> 01:14:02,160
Be well right now, right?
I think governments are not

1312
01:14:02,160 --> 01:14:04,960
fearing well right now, no.
Not well.

1313
01:14:05,560 --> 01:14:07,520
You could ask Argentina how they
feel.

1314
01:14:08,480 --> 01:14:10,000
I think they're a little
happier.

1315
01:14:10,320 --> 01:14:14,800
But, but I know that.
So in Israel, like, they make

1316
01:14:14,800 --> 01:14:18,480
coalitions and like there's a
certain amount of seats and each

1317
01:14:18,480 --> 01:14:20,080
seat belongs to a different
party.

1318
01:14:20,320 --> 01:14:23,720
And then if you want to win, if
you don't have enough seats by

1319
01:14:23,720 --> 01:14:25,160
yourself, you have to make a
coalition.

1320
01:14:25,160 --> 01:14:27,560
But that coalition could
collapse at any point if someone

1321
01:14:27,560 --> 01:14:30,080
pulls out then.
And so elections could

1322
01:14:30,080 --> 01:14:33,400
technically happen every six
months if you know if that was

1323
01:14:33,400 --> 01:14:35,720
the case.
How does it work in South Africa

1324
01:14:36,320 --> 01:14:39,760
so.
Up and up until this last

1325
01:14:39,760 --> 01:14:46,920
election was the ANC, the
African National Congress Party

1326
01:14:46,920 --> 01:14:53,520
and they were the ruling party
and in this last election.

1327
01:14:54,400 --> 01:14:57,640
How often are they every four?
Years, OK.

1328
01:14:57,800 --> 01:15:02,920
And a party in there's a party
that's in charge or a leader of

1329
01:15:02,920 --> 01:15:04,680
a party that's in charge,
correct?

1330
01:15:05,800 --> 01:15:11,280
OK.
So, so the ANC was the ruling

1331
01:15:11,280 --> 01:15:16,040
party and in this last election
they obviously lost a number of

1332
01:15:16,040 --> 01:15:21,440
the the ballots to not be the
ruling party anymore, but

1333
01:15:22,520 --> 01:15:29,480
marginally, right.
So before every five years,

1334
01:15:29,840 --> 01:15:33,080
every five years is an election
in South Africa.

1335
01:15:33,080 --> 01:15:37,720
And so now we've got the DA,
which is a Democratic Party and

1336
01:15:37,720 --> 01:15:41,840
they have got certain number of
seats in in parliament.

1337
01:15:42,240 --> 01:15:48,800
And so they are carving out a
way how to bring more of the

1338
01:15:48,800 --> 01:15:58,000
democratic viewpoints and
representatives into the

1339
01:15:58,000 --> 01:15:59,520
government.
And how do you do?

1340
01:15:59,520 --> 01:16:02,800
That are they appointed or voted
or how does that work they.

1341
01:16:02,840 --> 01:16:09,040
Are so they were the majority
winning party out of the

1342
01:16:09,040 --> 01:16:13,800
percentage that the ANC lost.
So they came in and then between

1343
01:16:13,800 --> 01:16:19,320
the ANC and the Democratic
Party, they elected various

1344
01:16:19,320 --> 01:16:21,240
officials into various roles.
Gotcha.

1345
01:16:21,720 --> 01:16:22,240
Gotcha.
Gotcha.

1346
01:16:22,480 --> 01:16:23,240
Gotcha.
Cool.

1347
01:16:23,480 --> 01:16:25,080
OK.
And that's how stuff gets done.

1348
01:16:25,080 --> 01:16:28,200
So.
So who the officials actually

1349
01:16:28,200 --> 01:16:30,080
are is not necessarily up to the
people.

1350
01:16:30,840 --> 01:16:32,880
The people would like to party,
Correct.

1351
01:16:33,160 --> 01:16:35,200
I guess that's where the room
for a lot of corruption comes

1352
01:16:35,200 --> 01:16:37,440
in, right?
Because I mean, if you'll bounce

1353
01:16:37,440 --> 01:16:41,880
from party to party.
No, it's it's not like the US,

1354
01:16:41,880 --> 01:16:46,760
where sometimes you're
Republicans, sometimes you're

1355
01:16:47,000 --> 01:16:48,200
not.
Tulsi Gabbard.

1356
01:16:48,240 --> 01:16:49,320
Right.
Tulsi Gabbard went from

1357
01:16:49,320 --> 01:16:53,040
Democrats to YEAH to Republican.
So in South Africa it's it's

1358
01:16:53,040 --> 01:16:56,000
pretty stable.
People are either for or

1359
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:59,240
against.
You don't see much crossing over

1360
01:16:59,240 --> 01:17:04,520
the the line over there at all.
And what's most important is

1361
01:17:04,520 --> 01:17:10,160
that the parties are able to
work together in order to forge

1362
01:17:10,160 --> 01:17:12,600
a path forward.
South Africa is very rich in

1363
01:17:12,600 --> 01:17:18,440
natural mineral resources.
We export, as I said, wines and

1364
01:17:18,560 --> 01:17:24,160
our produce is exceptional and
we have an incredible strong

1365
01:17:24,960 --> 01:17:29,160
workforce available and readily
available labour.

1366
01:17:29,400 --> 01:17:33,960
So with the right government and
the right structures in place,

1367
01:17:34,120 --> 01:17:37,720
it really is going on the world.
It's it's got all the potential

1368
01:17:37,720 --> 01:17:41,120
in the world and again, the most
beautiful people.

1369
01:17:42,000 --> 01:17:44,800
Yeah, I have to go check it out.
I want to go check it out if

1370
01:17:45,160 --> 01:17:46,760
you.
Have a good list of places to go

1371
01:17:46,760 --> 01:17:47,800
to?
It's tough.

1372
01:17:48,640 --> 01:17:50,560
It's a six hour time difference
from the states.

1373
01:17:51,000 --> 01:17:53,840
Correct in summer 6 and in
winter 7.

1374
01:17:54,720 --> 01:17:56,440
Because you guys don't do a
daylight savings?

1375
01:17:57,120 --> 01:17:58,320
No, because you're smarter than
that.

1376
01:18:00,520 --> 01:18:01,880
I still.
Can't figure it out.

1377
01:18:02,200 --> 01:18:03,960
I'm hoping one day I'll get it
the only.

1378
01:18:03,960 --> 01:18:06,920
Thing that I know is that when
daily savings daylight savings

1379
01:18:06,920 --> 01:18:10,040
hit, my 2 year old did not go
went to bed an hour and a half

1380
01:18:10,040 --> 01:18:13,360
later for the next month.
So I did not love that

1381
01:18:14,080 --> 01:18:18,160
personally.
But you know, I'm sure it exists

1382
01:18:18,240 --> 01:18:19,560
for a reason.
I don't know what it is.

1383
01:18:20,080 --> 01:18:21,080
Do you, do you know anything
about that?

1384
01:18:21,120 --> 01:18:23,640
Do you know of anything about
daylight savings and the fact I

1385
01:18:23,720 --> 01:18:25,880
guess has affecting your
circadian rhythm, right?

1386
01:18:25,960 --> 01:18:28,880
As to when, when the sun's
coming up, when you feel like

1387
01:18:28,880 --> 01:18:30,560
you're able to actually get your
day started.

1388
01:18:30,920 --> 01:18:33,440
Exactly.
So I mean, one of the ways in

1389
01:18:33,440 --> 01:18:38,440
order to, to combat or, or get
into the daylight saving is that

1390
01:18:39,360 --> 01:18:43,360
when you wake up with the sun
and you go and you stand outside

1391
01:18:43,360 --> 01:18:48,320
in the natural sunlight, you set
your circadian ribbon right.

1392
01:18:48,600 --> 01:18:52,640
And obviously your body
naturally will start releasing

1393
01:18:52,640 --> 01:18:56,600
melatonin earlier in the, in
the, in the early evening

1394
01:18:56,600 --> 01:18:58,640
because it's, it's getting
darker earlier.

1395
01:18:58,640 --> 01:19:01,600
So your body naturally changes.
It knows what to do.

1396
01:19:01,840 --> 01:19:04,640
I mean, to spots ourselves, our
bodies know what they're doing.

1397
01:19:04,760 --> 01:19:08,360
It can heal itself, it can do a
multitude of things, but we get

1398
01:19:08,360 --> 01:19:10,480
in the way.
Of our bodies so many times we.

1399
01:19:10,480 --> 01:19:12,440
Get in the web.
Our bodies, they know exactly

1400
01:19:12,440 --> 01:19:15,440
what they're doing.
We, we just pretend we know

1401
01:19:15,440 --> 01:19:21,000
more.
But it's, and you do you see it

1402
01:19:21,000 --> 01:19:22,720
with older people and you see it
with kids.

1403
01:19:22,720 --> 01:19:26,640
They naturally go in and out of
the, the, the daylight savings

1404
01:19:26,640 --> 01:19:28,400
so much better because their
bodies move.

1405
01:19:28,400 --> 01:19:30,120
They don't fight the time
change.

1406
01:19:30,400 --> 01:19:33,040
They don't fight the sun coming
up and going down.

1407
01:19:33,320 --> 01:19:38,200
So for me, the best thing to do
is to go outside as as early as

1408
01:19:38,200 --> 01:19:41,360
you can with the light and in
the middle of the day, go

1409
01:19:41,360 --> 01:19:43,320
outside.
Your body knows how to read that

1410
01:19:43,320 --> 01:19:45,960
as well.
And towards the end of the day

1411
01:19:45,960 --> 01:19:49,520
as well, to kind of get that
natural melatonin released.

1412
01:19:50,080 --> 01:19:54,040
Grounding goes with it.
And yeah.

1413
01:19:54,200 --> 01:19:58,360
Yeah, Are you a big grounder?
Well, I do believe in this, so I

1414
01:19:58,360 --> 01:20:00,240
understand I'm.
Just asking you, there's

1415
01:20:00,240 --> 01:20:01,760
nothing.
There's not as.

1416
01:20:01,800 --> 01:20:05,000
Much time do you ground as often
as possible?

1417
01:20:06,360 --> 01:20:09,400
I, I wish I, I could say yes, I
do, but I don't.

1418
01:20:09,680 --> 01:20:13,680
But the minute I have an
opportunity to, I do And I do

1419
01:20:13,680 --> 01:20:15,960
when I travel and and my kids
and my husband laugh at me.

1420
01:20:15,960 --> 01:20:18,920
I like, take off your shoes, get
your toes whittled in the

1421
01:20:18,920 --> 01:20:21,520
ground.
Let's kill them up.

1422
01:20:21,800 --> 01:20:24,320
I mean, in South Africa, I don't
think we ever wore shoes.

1423
01:20:24,320 --> 01:20:27,960
I mean, growing up like a shoe
was something you had to wear to

1424
01:20:28,400 --> 01:20:31,960
to church or to go to school.
But I mean, we go to school and

1425
01:20:31,960 --> 01:20:33,920
our shoes were off and we ran
around barefoot.

1426
01:20:33,920 --> 01:20:37,600
So I've pretty much felt like my
whole life I've always seeked

1427
01:20:37,600 --> 01:20:40,280
out to feel connected to the
earth.

1428
01:20:40,280 --> 01:20:44,360
You know, I slept on a grounding
mat for a while to see how that

1429
01:20:44,360 --> 01:20:47,960
did and how'd that go It, It was
interesting.

1430
01:20:47,960 --> 01:20:55,360
I, I think I was in a bad
sleeping phase at the time that

1431
01:20:55,360 --> 01:20:58,280
I was trying to use it.
So to be fair, I don't think I

1432
01:20:58,280 --> 01:21:02,400
gave it the full opportunity,
but I'm forever experimenting.

1433
01:21:03,400 --> 01:21:05,400
Whatever there's going, I want
to try it.

1434
01:21:05,400 --> 01:21:07,200
I want to feel it.
I want to know that it is

1435
01:21:07,200 --> 01:21:10,040
working or isn't working.
I want to see the difference on

1436
01:21:10,040 --> 01:21:13,720
my body.
So I do, I try lots of different

1437
01:21:13,720 --> 01:21:15,680
things just to see because I
can.

1438
01:21:15,920 --> 01:21:19,320
You know, our bodies are
marvelous things.

1439
01:21:19,320 --> 01:21:23,600
And I just want to see what,
what works the best and responds

1440
01:21:23,600 --> 01:21:25,520
the best to.
Yeah.

1441
01:21:25,600 --> 01:21:29,800
I, I have to work very hard to
get past this, but I hate when

1442
01:21:29,800 --> 01:21:32,720
I'm dismissive of just like when
I hear something and like my

1443
01:21:32,720 --> 01:21:35,760
immediate instincts is like,
Nah, like what am I saying?

1444
01:21:35,760 --> 01:21:39,840
I, I, why am I, why would I?
I don't know anything about a

1445
01:21:39,840 --> 01:21:41,880
lot of things, you know, like, I
don't know what I'd be

1446
01:21:41,880 --> 01:21:43,680
dismissing and why I dismiss out
of hand.

1447
01:21:44,560 --> 01:21:47,160
It's funny because, you know, my
mom would also would always

1448
01:21:47,200 --> 01:21:51,320
would, would say things that
that for years I would laugh at

1449
01:21:51,320 --> 01:21:53,440
her.
You know, I had a dry skin on my

1450
01:21:53,440 --> 01:21:55,040
face when I was in high school,
right?

1451
01:21:55,040 --> 01:21:58,000
Or when I was in college.
I had, you know, I had, I had

1452
01:21:58,000 --> 01:22:01,240
dry skin or, or dandruff.
And she's like, what you eat

1453
01:22:01,760 --> 01:22:04,240
alcohol.
And I'm like, don't be

1454
01:22:04,240 --> 01:22:07,440
ridiculous, you know, and I, I,
and we're getting so upset.

1455
01:22:07,440 --> 01:22:10,160
And I'm like you're saying just
giving you a doctor.

1456
01:22:10,240 --> 01:22:12,200
I, I, I was thinking, give me a,
give me a prescription.

1457
01:22:12,200 --> 01:22:14,320
I don't want to, you know, like
that, that can't possibly be

1458
01:22:14,320 --> 01:22:17,800
what the case is.
And, and then I realized that

1459
01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:20,000
she was right, you know, and
that's things that she got from

1460
01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:22,320
her mom and things that she got
from her mom.

1461
01:22:22,320 --> 01:22:24,760
And it's actually, I was talking
to a student the other day and

1462
01:22:24,760 --> 01:22:28,800
we're talking about breathing
and just, you know, how

1463
01:22:28,800 --> 01:22:31,280
important it is to get your
breathing under control at

1464
01:22:31,280 --> 01:22:33,280
different points and, you know,
depending what you're trying to

1465
01:22:33,280 --> 01:22:36,120
accomplish, right?
But I was like, breathing is

1466
01:22:36,120 --> 01:22:37,320
everything.
He's like, what do you mean?

1467
01:22:37,920 --> 01:22:40,200
I said, well, what do you do
when you panic?

1468
01:22:40,680 --> 01:22:46,280
He's like, you hyperventilate.
I was like, and how do you get

1469
01:22:46,280 --> 01:22:48,160
yourself out of what people tell
you to do to calm down?

1470
01:22:48,640 --> 01:22:50,120
Like deep breath.
I was like, great.

1471
01:22:50,120 --> 01:22:52,080
I was like, and now when you're,
when you're boxing, you're

1472
01:22:52,080 --> 01:22:53,680
fighting because he, he boxes
when you're fighting.

1473
01:22:53,680 --> 01:22:55,000
What do they tell you to do?
He's like, breathe.

1474
01:22:55,000 --> 01:22:56,680
I was like, when you're jogging,
what do they tell you to do?

1475
01:22:57,000 --> 01:22:59,400
He's like, Oh my God.
And I was like, dude, I was

1476
01:22:59,440 --> 01:23:01,440
like, he goes, oh, because he
told me he's having a hard time

1477
01:23:01,440 --> 01:23:04,760
sleeping.
So I was like, if jogging and

1478
01:23:04,760 --> 01:23:09,920
running and thinking and
emotional regulation is all

1479
01:23:09,920 --> 01:23:12,800
connected to to breathing, I bet
breathing probably would help

1480
01:23:12,800 --> 01:23:16,040
you sleeping.
And he's like, right, but I

1481
01:23:16,040 --> 01:23:18,280
don't think that.
But when he initial, but I had

1482
01:23:18,280 --> 01:23:21,520
to explain that concept to him
when I initially told him, are

1483
01:23:21,520 --> 01:23:23,880
you breathing?
You focus on how you breathe.

1484
01:23:24,240 --> 01:23:27,520
He looked at me that I was
crazy, you know, And so like, I

1485
01:23:27,520 --> 01:23:29,320
think the biggest thing that
gets in most people's way is

1486
01:23:29,320 --> 01:23:34,320
that we are either not curious
or we are dismissive.

1487
01:23:34,400 --> 01:23:37,000
And I think both of those are
really, really potentially

1488
01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:38,600
deadly traits.
You know, they could kill you.

1489
01:23:39,120 --> 01:23:40,480
They're very.
Limiting, right?

1490
01:23:41,080 --> 01:23:48,800
Yeah, and so many times people
really do underestimate the the

1491
01:23:48,800 --> 01:23:52,720
value of breathing and how many
people hold their breath.

1492
01:23:52,720 --> 01:23:56,880
So when you first did it, I held
my breath because you are the

1493
01:23:56,880 --> 01:23:58,680
hyperventilator.
You hold your breath.

1494
01:23:58,680 --> 01:24:02,080
And often you've just got to say
to somebody breathe out, just

1495
01:24:02,440 --> 01:24:04,720
breathe.
Like all of a sudden they

1496
01:24:04,720 --> 01:24:07,600
realise.
And I was actually having a chat

1497
01:24:07,680 --> 01:24:11,320
to, to my one son today as well
about he was like, oh, every

1498
01:24:11,320 --> 01:24:13,720
time I wake up during the night,
I said, well, breathe.

1499
01:24:14,320 --> 01:24:15,800
And he says, OK, I do box
breathing.

1500
01:24:15,800 --> 01:24:18,640
I say, well, no, try this other
breathing exercise.

1501
01:24:18,640 --> 01:24:20,280
It's, you know, just try that
tonight.

1502
01:24:20,280 --> 01:24:24,160
Maybe that will help, you know,
because it's natural to wake up.

1503
01:24:24,160 --> 01:24:29,440
It's natural to feel in any
circumstances in life, stressed

1504
01:24:29,440 --> 01:24:32,920
or worked out or worried or
whatever it is.

1505
01:24:33,120 --> 01:24:37,080
And, and breath is your friend.
Breath is really your friend.

1506
01:24:37,080 --> 01:24:40,920
It can help regulate your
emotions, which is critical.

1507
01:24:41,880 --> 01:24:43,920
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I want to start.

1508
01:24:44,840 --> 01:24:46,440
I have to.
My wife just went last night

1509
01:24:46,480 --> 01:24:50,520
with her with her sister to a
breath work class and she came

1510
01:24:50,520 --> 01:24:51,880
back and she told me I'd have to
do it.

1511
01:24:51,880 --> 01:24:53,960
And we don't have time for this
right now, but when we do

1512
01:24:53,960 --> 01:24:56,240
another episode, if we do
another episode, we'll you can

1513
01:24:56,240 --> 01:24:58,440
talk more about it.
But I'm a big advocate of

1514
01:24:58,440 --> 01:25:00,560
psychedelics.
And so when my wife told me

1515
01:25:00,560 --> 01:25:03,080
that, and I've heard before that
breath work gets you to the same

1516
01:25:03,080 --> 01:25:09,800
place and, and I'm curious and a
little nervous to try it out,

1517
01:25:09,800 --> 01:25:12,800
but I, I have to, I want to, I
want to get myself to get there

1518
01:25:13,520 --> 01:25:13,880
again.
It's.

1519
01:25:13,880 --> 01:25:16,360
The same thing.
It's a, it's a fear of the, you

1520
01:25:16,360 --> 01:25:19,200
know, it's a, it's not, it's not
even skepticism, just like the

1521
01:25:19,200 --> 01:25:21,120
new thing.
I just think I don't want to do

1522
01:25:21,120 --> 01:25:23,000
something new, but I know I want
to.

1523
01:25:23,000 --> 01:25:25,160
I'm happy to.
Do psychedelics and you're happy

1524
01:25:25,160 --> 01:25:28,120
to do weed but you're worried
about breathing.

1525
01:25:28,880 --> 01:25:30,320
We need to.
I don't know where it's going.

1526
01:25:30,440 --> 01:25:32,440
To take me because I don't know
where it's going to take me like

1527
01:25:32,440 --> 01:25:38,360
what the I've only.
Experienced it once I we had

1528
01:25:38,360 --> 01:25:44,040
like a forum situation and, and
we brought in a resource and we

1529
01:25:44,040 --> 01:25:47,600
went from a meditation into this
breath work.

1530
01:25:48,240 --> 01:25:51,320
And I've never done breathing
like this for 10 minutes solid

1531
01:25:51,320 --> 01:25:55,200
in my life.
And I cannot tell you the sense

1532
01:25:55,200 --> 01:26:00,040
of euphoria I had.
I cried, I hyperventilated, I

1533
01:26:00,040 --> 01:26:03,240
felt A rush of emotions like
I've never had.

1534
01:26:03,480 --> 01:26:07,880
I've never experienced anything
in my life what I experienced in

1535
01:26:07,880 --> 01:26:13,480
that 10 minutes of breath work.
So there's a lot of power in it,

1536
01:26:14,720 --> 01:26:17,520
but again, I don't do.
It I want to do it.

1537
01:26:18,280 --> 01:26:21,000
And not being dismissive of
trying all these things, these

1538
01:26:21,000 --> 01:26:23,560
things are good, are all good
and natural and healthy.

1539
01:26:23,560 --> 01:26:26,520
And it's like you've got to try
to understand what works and

1540
01:26:26,520 --> 01:26:29,600
doesn't work for you.
So you know, on on your path to

1541
01:26:29,600 --> 01:26:34,040
longevity and, and living young
and vibrant, vibrantly and full

1542
01:26:34,040 --> 01:26:35,920
of vitality.
You've got to try all these

1543
01:26:35,920 --> 01:26:39,800
different modalities and just
stick with what works.

1544
01:26:39,800 --> 01:26:42,160
And if it doesn't work there,
tried it move on.

1545
01:26:43,440 --> 01:26:45,600
I know it's going to work.
I have to.

1546
01:26:45,600 --> 01:26:50,160
I have to do it.
Thank you.

1547
01:26:50,160 --> 01:26:52,640
So much for the time.
Thanks so much for getting back

1548
01:26:52,640 --> 01:26:55,920
to me and for agreeing to do.
This is so much fun and I think

1549
01:26:55,920 --> 01:27:00,200
this is a really, really, really
thoughtful and fun conversation.

1550
01:27:00,200 --> 01:27:02,560
Exactly the coin that I really
was looking forward to.

1551
01:27:02,560 --> 01:27:07,240
So I hope to be in touch.
I, there's actually like 5 or 6

1552
01:27:07,240 --> 01:27:09,080
different topics that I'd
written down that we didn't get

1553
01:27:09,080 --> 01:27:11,640
to, but maybe we will do this
again sometime.

1554
01:27:12,400 --> 01:27:16,800
I hope to be in touch and I will
post this.

1555
01:27:16,840 --> 01:27:21,440
This episode will probably be
posted on Monday, if that's OK

1556
01:27:21,440 --> 01:27:24,160
with you.
But thank you so much.

1557
01:27:24,160 --> 01:27:26,480
This is so nice talking, so nice
meeting you, and I hope to be in

1558
01:27:26,480 --> 01:27:27,760
touch.
All right, Yeah, you.

1559
01:27:27,760 --> 01:27:29,560
Too.
Thank you so much for the time.

1560
01:27:29,800 --> 01:27:31,600
There's so much fun.
Take care, have a good one.

1561
01:27:31,960 --> 01:27:32,200
Bye.