#128: (18+) Dru Cuthbert / A&M Ju Jitsu / Parenting / PTSD and War / Psychedelics

0:01 Welcome to another episode of Come Together. Oh, freaking Beer Journey, where I started drinking all those crazy Ipas and stouts and sours and stuff like that. None of the beer that tastes like beer. Yeah, none. Of the beer that tastes like beer. Then at a certain point, dude, I gained probably 40 lbs from drinking that shit. And then, then at a certain point I cut it out. And then I realized that a, a stout or IPA could have 350, four, 150 calories in it. And I'm like.

0:42 I had no idea. Yeah, dude. But then these are clean. These are like a hundred 150 calories. These are much lighter. Yeah, for sure. And listen, they're, they're beer, they're carbs, you know, but they're. And then he's sick of it at a certain point. But I did. Coach, I'm so happy you're here, man. I'm happy to be here, man. This is going to be great. This is going to be great, yes. Where do you want to start, man? Do you want to start with? Tell me about who you are? Do you want to talk? What do you want to talk about? I've had so many podcasts or just talk about like, oh, I was in the Marine Corps. I did this. I mean, I could do like a brief little intro because you don't. Do a little brief. I just love to. Ask Coach, right? Yeah. OK, so perfect. So my real name is Andrew Nice. Cuthbert, why'd you do Gru instead of Trew? Because I figured out if if people. Gave me.

1:30 Attention. All right. Yeah, people just started calling me Drew just growing up. And it was like, OK, you can't give yourself a nickname, but you could choose how it's spelled, right? And I was like, OK, well, yeah, there's nothing that makes me have to put Drew, so why am I going to do it? Good for you. Yeah, I love it, Dru. Simple. Yeah, love it. It's great. Yeah. So yeah, my, my name is Andrew Cuthbert Drew for short. Now Drew Phoenix is my alter ego. Is that your poor name? That's the jiu jitsu name. That's the there's a spoken word poetry that I used to do a lot of get. Out of here, really.

2:10 You did poetry, Really. Because. When I was younger, like, you know, my dad was in and out my life and when he left when I was in 8th grade, when I felt like I was becoming a man. 8th grade. Yeah. Or forced. I was forced to grow because I left. Yeah, yeah. The way I used to get my emotions out, I just started writing one night and I was like putting words together at that time. It was like very Doctor Seuss ish Seuss itch. Putting words together in a way just made me feel like I was creating some sort of art and it made me feel better. Totally, that's what. Express it. Cathartic, yeah. Yeah, without anybody even telling me, I just, I just grabbed the journal one night and I just started doing it, writing about how he made me feel.

2:57 And then from there, when I joined the Marine Corps, they used to make us do like, presentations. And from that I realized that I could command the stage. Yeah, perform. Yes, yeah. And then I started when when I came out and I was dealing like with a lot of PTSDI realize that like the same way that it made me feel good when I was younger to write. I wrote, started writing. Because I don't think that goes away ever, by the way, like that once you have like once that's like your outlet, like I don't think that like changes for most people, you know? No. And one thing like I need to really get back into it because Miyamoto Musashi, he wrote the book of Fight Rings.

3:42 Are you familiar with him with that? Book No. It's a great book. Miyamoto Musashi was a famous Ronan right? A samurai who lost his his master. OK, I think you, I think you were starting to tell me about this one time book of five rings, you said. Yeah, book of five rings. Yeah, but in the very beginning of the book is the most profound thing. Like you don't even have to read the book, you just read the sentence. You're like oh shit, that makes sense. He talks about how he in duels, he won like 60 somethings duels, right. And he, he is the one that first used 2 swords, right? 167 duels. And he's like, what I've learned in that entire journey of of killing 67 people is that if you just focus on the sword and not the paintbrush, then you'll become imbalanced. OK.

4:30 And then you got to feel it out. No, like you can't just train, train, train, train, train. You have to have like an artistic outlet, right? So me the paintbrush. Oh, I see, I see, I see. I see. If you just chained by the sword and not the paintbrush isn't OK, Gotcha. Right. You'll find another an emotional outlet. There's some kind of creative outlet. Because then you're just like if we, if we speak in terms of yin and Yang, right? Like if you're just Yang all the time, like you're like the sun, you're just beating down on everything, then there is no balance. You need the yin, you need yin and Yang. Just like men. We have more testosterone than women, but we also have estrogen. Balance us out. Just like women, they have a little bit of testosterone too, right? But they have estrogen. So our bodies are made-up like this. So he's just like.

5:12 Talking, I think everything's like that. Yeah, everything's like that. And, and we're just trying to find the balance and that's what everyone struggles with. And like, even it's, it's interesting. I was thinking about this as far as like sobriety goes, because I took a month off of drinking a couple a little while back and it was awesome. Like at first it was tough. Like I didn't like, I was just like, because I drink casually. Like I drink like I'll have a beer at night after I have dinner while I'm watching TV or cleaning the house. I just like have a beer I'm sipping on. And so I missed that kind of having that part of my routine. And I was thinking like, and then after a couple of weeks, it's like the truth is like I don't need alcohol. Like I've never like I haven't. I didn't drink to get drunk in years. You know, like you drink casually and like if you happen to get tipsy, you get tipsy great, you know? But and then I was thinking to myself, but like, why GO-1 Extreme or the other?

5:59 Like, why? Like completely abstain And like, why? And like, yeah, it's good to take a month off. And the truth is I should probably do it once a year anyway, you know, for that sake of balance. But like, the people that completely abstain are the people that typically have the hardest time with controlling themselves to begin with, right? I imagine. You know that reminded me. You know how we have a big recovery community down here? Yeah, huge. And I have, I have issues just with the little bit that I know about it. OK. Because every person that I've ever met in recovery, they all smoke cigarettes. Do they? Yes. And the way that they like greet, the way that they talk about themselves, they're like, Oh, my name is Andrew and I'm an alcoholic. It's an identity.

6:43 Yeah, it's and you know, every religion talks about how powerful the words I am is sure right. It's like you say I am, you're like commanding your reality, like, OK, this is what you are. So you're going to say you're an alcoholic for the rest of your life. For what? The only people that I've known that have gone through that program, which was I used to be part of a group doing the spoken word, right? Yeah. Our director, his name is Teo. Teo went through that program, but he's never once said I'm an alcoholic, right? He's like, yeah. He's like I, I, I, I went through a, A, right? I was in recovery for a little while and now I just tell me.

7:24 Yeah. Grant Cardone's another one who went through it, but he doesn't. Does he? I didn't know that about him. Yeah, you see, 'cause he's not always like, oh, I'm an alcoholic, I'm an alcoholic. And both of those 2 they did it start smoking cigarettes like all the other people that that I've. Because, yeah, and a lot of times it's because people are shifting one addiction for the other. One of this for the other. So for the majority of people that I've found it that I've met in recovery, it's like they they just trade one addiction to the other. And to me it just didn't make any sense. Yeah, it makes sense. And I don't know if I'm sure they make money, right. I'm sure the A A programs are funded, right? Mostly they're funded one way or the other, right? Whether it's it's for profit or or not non profit, right. I think by commanding everybody's reality to say I am an alcoholic, it just keeps people in the system. You think so?

8:10 Oh yeah, just like just like in the medical system, right? They're not really going to sell you cures. Right, right, right. Of course, we'll say there's a great line. I I'll send you the video after I'll sell you. I'll get you prescription plan, but not but I won't cure you like I'll get you like I'll get you on a plan, but I'm not going to actually fix the root of the problem. You know, I'll just keep on applying a Band-Aid or keep giving you Tylenol forever. And we see it in the medical system, right? And also I have AI have a theory. OK, I love the thing for a hat. Theory. Let's do it, dude. Got it. I got it. This is this is the Jewish Syndra. Oh, the reason why the VA medical system which is the veterans medical system is all fucked up and people are like oh they don't do enough for veterans blah blah blah. It was made like that for by design. And the reason why I say this is when I'm in, when I was in boot camp, every Marine that goes through boot camp, they tell us about these amazing Marines that have gone through history, right?

9:15 Oh, this guy got Medal of Honor, This guy got 2 Medal of Honors, right? And they, they beat that history into US. One of them was Major General Smedley Butler. Yeah. Oh, I heard about him. He wrote up Wars the Racket. Where's the racket? I taught that to my 10th grade, 10th and 12th graders. That's why I wanted to come talk around veteran's day 'cause I lost. And next time he's talk about wars, the racket, bring me in. OK. Because I have I have a spoken word piece that I made where I quote him because I'm talking shit about the war. Yeah, right. That I participated in. And I'm like, well, basically I said, well, you could listen to me. I mean, you know, I mean, you could you could be against what I'm saying. But this is Major General Smithy Butler's word. Sure, War is a racket. It is, and it always has been, is possibly the oldest, surely the most vicious and easily the most profitable.

9:59 It's the only racket in which profits are reckoned in dollars and losses in lives, right? Yeah. So next time you talk. To kick ass line too. Oh yeah, kick ass line, dude. Yeah. So the reason why he wrote War is a racket, I'm not sure if you if you're familiar with this, but the reason why he did that is because after World War One, there was 100,000 angry veterans in the country because they weren't being taken care of, OK. And the five richest businessmen in the country go to Smedley Butler and they're like, hey, Woodrow Wilson is not letting us go to war and we need war for our profits. So we want you to lead these 100,000 angry veterans on the White House for a coup d'etat so that you can overthrow the government. You we put you in charge, but we just keep going to war. We keep doing that.

10:45 They. Said that to Smedley Butler, Yeah. In so many who. Said that. I don't know. Whatever it was, I would have the chain of command. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go. Is running the show. The reason why we're going to war with with Venezuela now are the same, are the same people. This scene, yeah. And, and if you look through our history, every war has a profit. Every single. Just point on any spot on the map and tell me what minerals are there. Tell me what commodities they have to think. All right, you got to give to me. I don't. I only think the only war. I think that we probably should have fought world. War 2. World War 2. Maybe. Maybe because it's like we didn't see those guys going to going to Pearl. Harbor, Yeah.

11:26 Right, it's only 7:00 AM. Yeah. That's a little fishy to me. That's. A little fishy. Fishy to me. It was a little fishy. And then, yeah, and they turned the way the Jews coming, I think, before that point. So they weren't entering for the sake of like protecting anyone in particular. Because if anything, it should have been like, this is what's happening to the Jews. We need to go over there to stop it straight up, yeah. And then working with other all the other like 25 million people died in World War 2. I'm having someone on next week. She emailed me. She goes. I listened to one of your episodes of the guy that's talking about how wars racket. She's like, I just, Oh yeah, somebody. Else talked about it. Oh, dude, I'm going to say I'm going to give you his book. It's going to blow your mind. She's like, I've been do I'm Chinese. I believe she's Chinese.

12:09 And she's like, I've been studying the history of China and Japan in World War 2. No one knows about that. And I'm like, how come no one knows about that? Yeah, you know that, right? She's like, it was, it was it was classified until like 10-15 years after the war. All the war crimes that we were associated with with Japan, we're all classified. And that's why it was like taken out of like the history, the history book cycle. And and we're doing a podcast together. She's going to talk. She's I'm like, listen, just give me a class. Like I'm just going to listen and ask you questions and you're just going to tell me everything, you know, because I beautiful. It's going to be sick. Hell yeah. I'm really excited about that one. Yeah, definitely. So anyway, so. OK. So, so, so, so, so finish, so, so the capital. So Smedley said you guys can go fuck yourself, right? And he wrote it as a.

12:56 Referee or he died shortly after. I don't know if they killed him. I think he's he just spent the rest of his days just. He died young. He died right after World, right? Either right before World War 2 started or right after World. War 2 started though. At that point we can look it up, but. We're talking about a man who who who won two medal of honours and spent 30 years in the Marine Corps. He couldn't have been that young. He died. What was it, 60s? Oh no. He was older when he was born in 1881 and died in 1940. Yeah, right. He lived the full life. He was 58, dude. 58. He was 58. What he did in his life bro. Most people don't. Do that. Live to talk about the first Medal of Honor. This my forgot 2. Yeah. What does need to get that do you know? It's usually something that you go above and beyond yourself to save.

13:43 So like self sacrificing opportunity to self sacrifice and you made it out. Like, a lot of people get the Medal of Honor from jumping on grenades, right? Right. That's like, for sure. Now, do people think like, oh shit, I'm going to get the Medal of Honor? No, but one thing that they teach you, they, they they really preach in the military is taking care of the person to the left and the right of you. They're like, God, corn country don't mean shit in a foxhole, right? It's all about the Marine to the left and the right of you. And you guys better bring each other back home, right? That's how we function. So boom, Smedley says go fuck yourself. And he starts, he starts talking about, you know, wars, a racket. And that's what he spent the rest of his days doing. All right, now, if you think about it, going back to the conversation we talked about earlier, right, there's no profit in healing, right? There's only profit in sick patients. So now you have these veterans who, when they're young and impressionable, we send them off to war. Yeah.

14:42 Easily propagandize. But now when they start getting into their mid 20s and they start asking questions. And they and they want to have families. They want to know why they're going to war. They want to know what the purpose is a little bit more because you're thinking more about a bigger picture of your life than just let's go get those. Apps those, those towel heads. Yeah, yeah. Whatever you want to call them, whatever. Gooks in in Vietnam? What? Are they going to call the people in Venezuela now? Yeah, whatever. It is, yeah. You just love the train of thought. No, it's OK. You're saying that there's no money in it. There's no money. You have all. These angry veterans with war experience that are no longer young and impressionable. If we, if we offered a cure, if America offered a cure to these veterans, like, like adept hospital systems, staff and a lot of resources, Right. A big old budget, yeah.

15:34 If that was offered to veterans and there was actually curing veterans, like actually going through the proper process to get over post traumatic stress for us to get over all of our physical injuries, you're going to have a bunch of healed angry veterans at the government, right. So who better to group together to go try to overthrow the, the, the government? Yeah. It would be the better people like me, yeah, but I'm sure I'm on some FBI watch list I have. You think so? Bro I. Have to be. Because you came back from war and now you're and now, now what? But you don't do anything off the, you don't do anything on the radar. I don't right, but I spent a lot of time doing the spoken word right. I have I, I, I spent a little while blowing up my social media presence.

16:20 So if they so if they see in a little bit. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, yeah. But also, I think all of the Post 911 veterans have to be on some sort of like, keep an eye on us, right? Because they wouldn't let, they can't let us band together, right? Because there would be a problem. We know all the weapons systems, we know how to work together and most of us have experience, right? So we would be the ones to call. That's fascinating. So if they. Keep us if they keep putting the band aids on us and keep us going back to the VA trying to get help, trying to get help. Oh, we're not getting help fast enough. Oh, poor, poor my poor little veteran. And then the culture, right? What they, what they embedded in society is like, oh, these guys went to war for you. You have to thank them for their service. Yes, because we have freedom because of these guys, which is total bullshit.

17:08 Yeah. You think so? Bro I wouldn't be having this conversation with you if like the the tone of this conversation wouldn't be like this unless. Like if we if it was, if it was for you wouldn't be talking like this exactly. If it was another uniformed army on the other side, yeah, Right. And it's US uniform. Yeah. Military uniform versus uniform, Military age male versus military age male pro. I'll be like, yo, we're fucking fighting for freedom. Fuck everything else. I don't care what I experienced. Yeah, TST, go fuck yourself. That's how I would be speaking. Right. Instead, I'm sitting here in front of you saying, dog, you know what I experienced in Iraq? Moral injury.

17:48 Because these people that I was fighting look like me. Right. Right. They looked like, you know, if, if there was, if, if China was in Humvees right now on our neighborhood streets. And they're shooting at us. And they're just just around thinking that they're the boss of of this country. And, and people will come up to us and be like, hey, guys, you want to start planting some roadside bombs to get rid of these mother fuckers? Yeah. Yes, easy, yeah. You want to start fighting these guys? Yes. You want to be insurgents? Absolutely. Let's get them the fuck out of our country, right? Because what are they doing here? We didn't even do at 9:11. Right. Iraq had nothing to do, no. No, no, Iraq had a lot of oil. You're going to you're going to you're going to love this book.

18:29 I'm going to give you dude yeah, you're going to lose your mind. Yeah, he's yeah, it's it's scary dude, and I've becoming and I'm becoming more and more anti war judge based on me. Another one of those let. Me see. Let me see if I can light it with this. Dude, I'm, and I, I mean, I, I, you know, I haven't talked a ton about this, but like, I'm pretty anti the Israel, you know, military industrial complex because there is absolutely a huge one there, dude. And it's the same shit. And you know what, the same veterans like you, you know, many kids there are, are traumatized, you know, and, and the problem, and I mean, the only thing that I, the reason why I typically keep my mouth shut is because I don't like, we've gotten attacked on American land twice in our like, our history, you know, and like we had, we spent 80 years of war because of that essentially, or 100 years of war almost because of that. So, like, I don't know what it's like to, like, be in a country where our borders are, by the way, for everyone, like everyone in Europe and Russia and China and the Middle East, they're all upping each other's, you know, up each other asses, you know, And I don't know what it's like to do to be like that. You know, I mean, we never go to war with Mexico. If Trump really cared about fentanyl and cared about the drug overdoses, we'd say shut, shut the cartels down. You know, like, that's where you start. Yeah.

19:50 You know, start with Venezuela. What do you do with Venezuela? Yeah, that's why I, like, I heard like rumblings of like going war with the cartel. I'm like, OK, that makes sense. Yeah, but you know, that's a, that's a real war. Yeah, that's a real. That's like, that's like not like an America bullying another small country war. That's like a war. That's like a war. That's a real war. OK, see now let me let me go fight in a war like that. Let me feel honourable about the service because I know if I go after people in the drug cartel then that's an actual enemy that's affecting the United. States sure, sure. Right. But it's, it's not, it's we. We're fighting who? Well, what do we spend 20 years in Iraq, 2020 years in Iraq and Afghanistan just to turn around like there's nothing?

20:33 All I have, really, all I have from that is a bunch of dead friends, Yeah. And a bunch of fellow Marines that. And and by the way, economically, we're crumbling because of. It and that veteran suicide. Rate insane. I heard now it's 44. When I was like, it really in it, it was like 22. That's crazy, but it makes sense. Yeah. Because the number one symptom of post traumatic stress is depression. Every antidepressant has a black box warning saying that suicidal ideation is a possible side. Sure, sure. Right. So it's like you put two and two together. The pills are causing yeah the fucking. Yeah, suicides. At least that's one of the causes. I'm sure the lack of purpose is is another cause because also. Whether the guilt again, because what you're saying the more the more injury you're walking around and you're fighting civilian, you're you know, you're racking ransacking civilian homes and like you're not fighting people in uniform necessary.

21:28 I mean, I don't know if the do you think you think the rates different for soldiers that are in combat with other soldiers as opposed to soldiers that are riding through town just like demolishing towns or whatever? OK, because. You said if you feel morally different about it, right? OK, but this is this is this is this is interesting. I'm glad you asked this question. Statistically, the people who are in non infantry jobs experience most more post traumatic stress than the ones that are actually in infantry. Really. Because if you sign up for into infantry, yeah, your job is to fight and kill. That's it, right. So once you do it, it's like you you have a less tendency to have PTSD because you signed up for it.

22:15 Whereas like me, when I first went in, I was trying to avoid the war. When I started training for it, I actually embraced it. Yeah. Because it's like. What changed? Bro, so when I when I got in, I signed up to be communications so I was a radio man Cool radio man. They need an every single unit in the Marine Corps. Infantry is one of them. But I went to an artillery unit, right. Artillery is, you know, big gun, go boom, right. But from far away. Yeah, Right. Yeah. So, so. But the problem is, is that they only need one artillery unit because it's like artillery could shoot from very far away, right?

23:01 If I'm on the ground as a calm guy and we need artillery because these guys are like shooting at us from this building. And we could, we could tell like it's most mostly enemies in there. Like we need like we're getting like ambushed and like we're under fire And we need you guys to clear out that building over there. We need you to blast it. All right. I called to the Florida Obser, Yo, hey, we need artillery at this place. And like there's like a way to do it right That's very formal or it's called a nine line. Like we, you know, we call it in over the radio. Bureaucratic. Yeah, it, well, it's, it's very systematic. OK, systematic. Hey, we need, we need artillery at these coordinates, right? We're taking an enemy fire from here. We need artillery here.

23:42 You call, there's, there's like a guy in the middle called a forward observer who's like on the hills, let's say. So you call to a forward observer of server calls to the artillery unit that's back on base. And then artillery unit fucking sends rounds. And they communicate with one another fast enough to be effective. Cool. Granted, you need Artie, right? Yeah, you're being that you're like hunkered down. Yeah, OK, you're shooting, getting shot at, but you're like behind cover. You're like, we need artillery or air support or if you're if you're close enough to the water, naval gunfire. OK, there's all these things you could call in. Yeah, right. If you call in artillery, you know, you call back to baseball and they shoot. You don't need multiple artillery units at. Right, right. Yeah.

24:24 So if you don't need artillery, right, and you're in an artillery unit, then they usually like make you something else because they say that every Marine is a Rifleman first. OK? So what they did with us is they said, OK, these people need protecting. This Colonel, this general, this person, this person, you guys are an artillery unit that we do not need right now, right? But we, you guys are going to deploy. So we're going to take, we're going to split you guys up and we're going to make you personal security details. Cool. So the six months before I went to Iraq, we learned how to shoot pistols. We did every high speed infantry course in Camp Lejeune, NC Cool.

25:05 We trained like we were infantrymen and the more we trained for it and they got us into the mentality of just like going to war, we're going to go fight, we're going to go fight, blah, blah. That made me like it. Like I felt like a Marine. Yeah, you know, cuz I, I, I didn't really have very impactful male role models growing up. So this is my first time being around them consistently. And they're saying, let's go fight and we're training and we're training hard and we're fucking Marines. Yeah. So that's what switched it for me. It's like, oh shit, I don't want to go. Fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. How old are you at this point? 19 was. 19 right? Jesus dude 19. 19.

25:45 Wow, what do you like it? What do you like in 19? A fucking idiot. I'm a 19 year old. An idiot trusted with a gun in a foreign country. Loaded gun. Yeah, dude. Guns. Guns. No people. Guns. Yeah, Yeah. And you don't. Speak the language. You don't. You don't do anything dude. No crazy. Yeah, insane. Crazy. Like thinking back on it like that's an experience I'll never have again. Yeah. Right, my job. I'm getting paid for this. Yeah. To go run around the country, to be trusted enough to know when to shoot, when not to shoot. Yeah, it's insane. And you think 19's too young?

26:28 I think it could mature you. And I think it could mature you the the sense of responsibility. No, for sure. I don't think 19's too young. I think how do I say it, because I had a good, I had a good answer. I think that if you're going to have a standard where you believe that a 19 year old is responsible enough to go to war, yeah. And know and and be responsible enough to say I'm going to kill or not kill. Another person, Yeah. Right, then we should be able to drink, hold the standard across the board. Right, so you're saying the inconsistency is not cool? No, right, Because think about it.

27:10 At 19, yeah. At 19. So at 19 I can do all that stuff I just mentioned. Can I buy a beer? No, you can't vote. I can't. You can vote. Oh, yes, you can. I'm sorry. Yes, I'm sorry. Yes. But right now you can't buy. You can't buy tobacco either, no. So in those countries you can they're going to send you in a country where you're easy have to drink there, you don't have to buy tobacco there. You. Don't do it. You can't. You can't when you're there, you can't like go off base and go, It's not like Vietnam. We're like Vietnam. You go to go to South South Vietnam and like, you know, you could go like into the city and like go get. Dude, our buddy bought our Dalton, partied hard in Korea, as you said, South Korea, yeah.

27:54 That's Korea we're talking about a war zone. Yeah, Korea wasn't a war. Zone No. North Korea, Korea's nothing worth. It no. North Korea probably is, but we don't go into North Korea. We just stand at the line like looking across the make. Sure, everything's right. Yeah, sure. So yeah, that's. So 19 year olds should be consistently treated like adults across the board. Well, it's like, it's like if you're in the military and they and they give you that level of trust, yeah, then it should be across the board. Because it's not like I wanted to go drink myself retarded even though I did. Yeah, OK. But it's like I should have been afforded the opportunity, like to say that, well, if we were, if you're responsible enough to do this, then you can do that too.

28:37 Yeah, for sure. Maybe it would have took away the, like, what's it called? Like, Like, oh, don't push the big red button, whatever that's called. OK, Right. It's like, don't give me a big red button. Yeah. Just say, oh, it's a button. You can press it if you want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It would have made me not get probably get into alcoholism so much that I struggle with in the Marine Corps because it's like, I can't drink. So it's like, I want to drink. Yeah. Of course. So you want like casual exposure to that. It's not a big deal so that it's not something you feel like you have to abuse. Yeah. And I think that's good for the. I think that's good for human behavior. Yeah. Like, for example, I have guns in the house. OK. I remember when me and my cousin found my uncle's gun and we were like, Oh my God, it's a gun. Yeah.

29:17 Yeah, yeah. Why am I going to do that to my kids? So what do you? Do bro, I take the weapon out of the out of the thing wherever I have it. I unload, I show clear, right? Hey, guys, you see there's no bullets in here. Boom, close it. All right? What are the weapon safety rules? Yeah, right. And there's treat. Never keep. Keep. My 6 year old tell me treat, treat, never keep, keep. Treat every weapon as if it were loaded. Never point your weapon at anything you do not intend to shoot. Keep your weapon on safe until you intend to fire, and then keep your no, keep your fingers straighten off the trigger until you intend to fire, and then keep your weapon on safe until you're ready to fire. Right, right. For safety rules. They taught me that as a Marine. I teach my 6 year old.

29:59 Yeah. Right. I teach them that and I'm like, what is a gun? A tool? A tool for what? self-defense. Sure. When do you use it? When you feel like your life is in danger. Yeah. If somebody breaks into this house, Yep. Somebody's getting shot. Yep. Straight up. So like, I tell them about it, I let them touch it. Right. As soon as you're old enough, I'll take you to the range 'cause I'm demystifying it, sure. So it doesn't seem cool. I don't want my kids to have the same experience that I had when. I was a kid. Fascinating. Fascinating. Fascinated about it. Yeah, I I have my gum with me in my bag. My my son's like do you have your got 45? Granted, if he told his teacher this seemed not to be concerned right?

30:40 But fuck the teacher. You know what? I mean like. I do this because this is how I'm choosing to parent and as you're right, it's my right. Totally. I could teach my kids about weapons. They're not going to be so. Oh my God, it's demystified. They don't give a fuck about the what? Yeah, Yeah, yeah. That's. Great. It's the same principle. What else? What else have you implemented that like with raising your kids that like you didn't have but like you, you think is important? Like important enough to like that you want to implement it in your own life? So I'll start from from baby stuff like where your how old is your daughter? She's seven months. OK, What I would do with her right now is every time she messes up a diaper, have like you'd clean it up, right?

31:25 You put it in a bag. I don't know if you used a disposable diaper, do you? No, you tossing. Out are you tossing out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK. Put it in a bag, tie it up, give it to her, make her throw it away. Because what you're doing right now is you're teaching your child how to take literally take care of their own shit. Yeah, right. Yeah, it becomes a game to them because, oh, you know, I get to go, you know, I get to go and then I'm yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my good girl. Like it's like you train a dog. But it's sure good human, right? Sure, sure. By doing this now, they, they understand that, you know, they can say they, they get, they, they, they learn how to follow orders. Because look, I will never hit my kids because I know when I used to get hit when I was younger, all it did was turn me into a a better liar so I could avoid.

32:13 Yeah. Yeah, that's all you care about. Yeah, I'm just trying to avoid getting hit. My kids, I won't fucking hit them. I instill the fear of God, right? Because I could talk loudly. I'm big, you know? But but I I won't hit them. You know what I mean? Yeah. When I get most mad, I just I keep my mouth shut. I just pick him up and I pop him in his bed and I just like walk out, see? And that's all I do, OK. And then I come back. I'm like, you want to talk about what what, what went wrong? You want to talk about like what happened? Which is important, right? It's important to communicate with your kids like that because it's like you're giving a respect for another growing human being instead of like how I was raised. And I'm, I'm, I'm almost sure you were raised like this where it's like, do as I say, not as I do because I said it. Yeah.

33:02 Right. Yeah. It's so cats running around. That's OK. So. So going back to the the whole throw away your diapers thing. Yeah, right. Well, my son turned 2. I told him throw away his diapers. He's a little tired. He goes. No, Daddy, because at 2 they realize that they're a separate entity from their mother. And they like. No, because it's like, I'm a person. Yeah, for sure. Right. It was like. No, yeah. Yeah, so he's like, he's in his head. He's like, I don't feel like it right now. I'm tired. No. And then I dropped down to his level, right? Get on the knee. And my brother's a fucking asshole because he was like standing behind my son, right? So I'm like, Khalil, go throw it away now. And now we had our first stare down. So now Khalil's staring at me.

33:50 I'm staring at him. I'm not letting go. Yeah. And my brother is cracking up behind me, but silently he's like, and I'm like, you motherfucker, because I'm trying not to break character. So, bro, it felt like an eternity. Me and this fucking 2 year old are staring each other down. And then he looks away. He looks back at me. He looks away, picks up the bag. He's like, OK, dirty. Yeah. And then I as soon as he did it, I'm like, good job. I'm like, sometimes we don't feel like doing stuff, but you have to do what Daddy's awesome because I believe that you should. Your child should be able to say no to requests, but never orders. There's a big difference.

34:32 There's a big difference. So like you're. Like getting me a drink is a request. Yeah, an order is like, go clean your room. Go clean your room. Yeah, there is no, there's no negotiating about cleaning the room. That is an order. You do that now, right? I don't want any questions. You tell me now like you do it. But if I say, can daddy have a hug? No, daddy. OK, You're within your right. That's your right. No problem. So like I know when I was younger where like I didn't feel like that person was a good person. I didn't want to say hi to them. I don't want to fucking hug them. You're they're weird. Answer my honor, whoever the fuck was in charge, go hug them. So now I got to hug them begrudgingly.

35:14 And Doug, that has to fuck with your psyche. Yeah, that'd be that makes that. I think that leads to people pleasing and all that. So when my kid was young, they're like, oh, say hi to your auntie. And he's just like, and then, then I'll leave him alone. Yeah. I'm like, hey, he has the rights. Like, he doesn't need to. He doesn't need to. And then like I get questioned like, Oh well then when does it become him acknowledging his rights and him being rude, right? I'm like when he gets old enough because. To give a shit about being rude. When he starts understanding social norms and stuff, like, OK, now my son is 6. When you walk into a room, you greet everybody. You say hello. Yeah. Whether you feel like it or not. I don't give a fuck. You're saying hello now it's an order. Yeah, right. Because that's polite.

35:54 Yeah, eye contact handshake. Handshake. Look at you. Yes, Yeah, that's right. All of that, Yeah. Right. Because now he's at that stage. You realize when your kid levels up, it's like a Pok��mon, right? You you totally. Totally. When it happens, like they start paying attention more to things that they start like acting a certain way, like oh, he levelled up. And you know, it's also crazy, dude, you could see now, and I see this everywhere I go. You go to the supermarket, you go to a bar, you go for a walk down the block and you see like teenagers and a lot of teenagers will, will they have like anxiety to even make eye contact to people you know, and you're like, no one ever taught you like how to look at some. By the way, it's funny because I was talking to my students about this. I teach in the Orthodox do a school and they're very sheltered in a lot of ways.

36:39 And you know, for better, for worse. But one thing that is for definitely for better. They don't have social media. They don't, they rarely have smartphones. According to the school policy, they're not allowed smartphones. They are so socially adept and so confident and so creative and so comfortable in their, in their skin, you know, and, and like, and then you walk down the block and like, you see like a, anywhere from like a 17 to like a 25 year old. And like you say hey to them. You're like, what's up? How you doing? Like, it looks like the fear of God is like running through them. And you're like, what are you afraid of, man? I'm not going to hurt you. Like, you know, like I'm, I'm just a dude. Why is he saying hi? I'm going to jog, you know, like I'm not going to do anything to you, but people are afraid. Yeah, because a lot of a lot of it sucks.

37:23 A lot of fathers aren't present. Yeah, whether they're in the house or not, there's a lot of fathers are not present. Yeah, OK, present father is there constantly on their kids ass correcting everything. Right. The nurturing comes from mom. OK, let the mom baby. Then they fucking fall down and scrape their knee. Go to mommy. Yeah, you'll be fine. Yeah. Go to mom. Yeah, right. That's that's that's because I believe that, you know, men and women have their strengths, right? Sure, men, probably physically stronger, probably more aggressive women. If the baby's crying, I'm sure she could deal with it way better than I fucking can. Yeah, I know she cleaned that house way better than I can. And she could put love in food like. Yeah, I don't give a fuck.

38:07 You take them in five. Star Chef for sure. Your grandma's going to be able to whip up something way better. Than that motherfucker, yeah. Way better. It's because women have that special ability to put love in food. Or thinks, I think that I think a lot of it's intention while you're doing it. It's like I care about like I'm a lot of times I'm doing shit. I'm, I'm doing things for the sake of getting it done. I'm not thinking I'm doing this for my family, for my kids to enjoy like sometimes I do. And they're all great. And you know, but I, I actually think that for sure there's probably, there's got to be a tangible difference. Absolutely. The energy you put into everything like that, shit matters. Whenever my mom would make a Shabbat meal on Friday, right, she'd say, like the food comes out based on how good of a mood or not I'm in that day. And she was like, you guys better help out. You better do your insurance because the food's going to be shitty tonight, you know, and you can taste it, You and and then, and there are times where I'll come back, like if I was in college and I come back for a weekend and like, I'll eat something like, were you in a bad mood today? You know, like you.

39:05 Could tell. I was off today, Yeah, I was off today, she was saying. I'll take food for my mom. It was love it. Yeah, yeah. And then you know what their dad experiences with the same thing. Like, yeah, I growing up, my dad used to take me to Modell's, get some baseballs and like go to the backyard and just hit him, you know, just he just throw a whole bucket of baseballs at me. I'll just go and then I'd run around for half an hour and pick them all up. You, I I that that's burned into my association of my memory forever. I don't even know why, dude. Like my dad spends a lot of time and money doing a lot of amazing things with us. That's one of the few memories that like from my childhood, that's like vivid, you know, and that I remember that I don't know whether I'm associating the memory or the feeling, you know, of like, this is just a great activity to like, just be doing with my dad. And like, I'm making contact with the ball and he's proud of me and I'm learning a sport and I'm feeling great, you know? And like, that's intention, you know, Like if he was, if he's on his phone the whole time, I don't know if he'd feel the same thing.

39:59 Bro, you know damn well you wouldn't feel the same thing. Yeah if he was just occupied with other stuff. Like my dad, after I turned 6 all he wanted to do is fucking deal drugs, make money, take us to fancy restaurants and just do bullshit. Yeah, go cheat. Go cheat on my own bunch of whores. Like, he really. Yeah. So like, he wasn't, he was, he was around sometimes, but he wasn't present. Right. But my dad was also one of the hardest working motherfuckers I've ever met. So like I have core memories when I was until I was 6, which if you, if you study like human psychology is if you don't get traumatized in those years of your life, then it'll set you up for success in the future. From from born to 6. From born to six.

40:40 So that is the that's the most important years of your kids life. That's when they develop all the tools that they're going to use to to deal with the world. So another thing that I do right then I got this from my my child's mom, which she sees amazing is no pacifiers. Yeah, we need to pacifiers. Think, think, think of the word pacify. Why are you trying to pacify your baby if the. Baby's crying. There's a reason. There's a fucking reason they're wet, they're hungry, they're hungry or tired. You have 5 things to go. On Yeah. But you know what? First sign of crying? Oh, my God. Pass. Fire. Yeah, that's fire.

41:21 Like what you're teaching that kid is to is to rely on something else. Fascinating. To for their emotional regulation. Would you say that if thumb would be better because it's self soothing or you don't think so? Like if a kid sucks their thumb like like that's like you take it with you. Like, it's not like you're counting on something separate from. You, I mean, it'll mess up their teeth with that too. I I don't, I don't like the the finger sucking because now you're just trading the, the pacifier for the finger. But what I've noticed with my son and other people who who don't, who decide not to do a pacifier, yeah, is that the kid may like start trying to put the fingers in the mouth, but then you're like, no. And they're easily just oh. Yeah, yeah. You have to do it early, though. Yeah, you. Can't let them develop that because now because they're looking for something to sue.

42:05 Yeah, right. But if you just like, no for the pacifier, no for the thumb. Yeah. Right now, granted, a lot of breastfed babies, you can start telling, like, especially when they get like, a little bit older, like if they're around 2, still breastfeeding, yeah, they'll associate, like, soothe with feeding. Yeah. And they'll be like, oh, like, you know, start crying for the yeah, yeah, just get on there just to soothe themselves. Yeah. Right. So you have to be careful of that. Yeah, that too. Right. But what I've learned with what what I've learned raising Khalil is that, like, bro, he knows how to soothe himself. Right. He may get flustered about something, but he's easy to come back. That's awesome. Never had to deal with temper tantrum. Wow, fucking dropping in the fucking store.

42:48 Never, right. You know, like you give him the look or you'd like stop that and then you know that my kids, oh, can I have this? Like we have vending machines at the gym. You know, we have vending at the gym. Can I have Gatorade? No, go drink water, OK? Yeah. But dad, can I no go drink water right? Like I'm able to say no and there is no tantrum. Right, right. He's 6, you said. Yeah, but now, now the six year old's starting to the six and 11611. The six year old's starting to like I this is another thing, right? I have to check myself because I'm not above my own bullshit. Yeah. So I check myself because I have to realize that, like, sometimes he's just inquisitive and he's not trying to talk back, right. The Marine in me is just like, stop talking and just do what I said.

43:35 Yeah. But now I'm starting to try to, like, remain calm. Yeah. When he's talking and he's asking, he's being inquisitive. I'm like, listen, when I talk, you have to do it, OK. But you're, you're questioning now. Like you don't understand. So let me explain it to you. Yeah, yeah. Right. So I think. That, you know, helps with that mindset. What weed. Yeah, it does. It does. It extends your patience for sure. You know, and you're going. To get you more playful. Yeah, and you're going to be like, you know what, let's let's talk it out. You know, like, how about this, you know, the the the stupid why conversation, right? What are you doing? Why, why, why? That's a happens to be a super important process.

44:17 And I have a friend of mine that used to tell me he actually asked me one time. This was like a real religious shock for me. He's like, I'm going to be a three-year old and ask you about your religious beliefs. Like wow, I believe like you. You believe in God. Yeah. Why? Step one, stop. I'm like, oh man. Then he goes Step 2. You did Judaism. Why? And I'm like, my family does. He goes, that's a good answer. You know, it goes, OK, why do they do it? Like, I don't know, maybe family, you know, and then and like we went through things like that and I found out dude, I got yeah, he got killed. You know what? You a Carpenter? To hold things back, dude, and that's, that's a method that's used I've and I've realized this more and more and I've actually I had a friend of mine I just had a argument with recently about this. Like you like don't expose yourself to any shit that's not good, that's not true.

45:06 And I'm like, first of all, how do I know whether it's true or not? And second of all, like there's nothing wrong with like hearing something out and then asking questions and like determining for yourself, like, oh, that's probably bought, that's probably bullshit. That's probably, you know, maybe that sounds like there should be something more to look into. And that sounds right, You know, and like, dude, I'm a 30 year old adult, father of two, you know, that works three jobs. I can decide for myself. I feel like, I feel like I'm fucking listening to this or not, you know, like that's the end of it. I, I love that. I love that because a lot of people, they get have this like dogmatic behavior when it comes to religion. And they just do it because this is what named the book, right? The Bible or the whatever. Yeah, this is what the Bible told me to do.

45:46 This is what I'm doing. Yeah. And it's like, you don't. You don't I I love people that are inquisitive, right? They understand, like, OK, you say, well, I do it like this because. And you have your reasoning behind it, but you're also open to other things. Sure, Right. Like, there's so many different walks of life. What's wrong with you as a Jew to sit down with a Muslim and just be like OK? Yeah, what's up? What's up? Yeah, nothing dude. Like. Me and you aren't fighting each other. Maybe the countries in the Middle East, they're fighting each other Me and you are not fighting each other right now. No, dude, tell me about the, the, the, the, the Koran, right? And I and I want to and we're let's talk about the Torah and, and I don't even know what this book is. That's the. Looks one of them. It's just it's a segment of the Torah. It's over the 5 bucks.

46:29 So it's like, let's let's find some common ground, let's see the differences. Let's kind of figure because it comes from what? Like the same people? Yeah, not the same people, but the same group, right? Totally, totally, totally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's probably Iguana. Yeah, do those that sounds. Like those guys shit in my pool, they climb up the tree to shit in my pool. I have probably done for that, so don't. Wanna. Maybe you'll you'll help me out one time with it because this it's a nightmare. I totally agree. And not even that I actually think like the root of a lot of arguments that I've had with people has just been based on miscommunication of terms, right. So like if I'm like, I think God is real and you're like, I don't think God's real. I'm like, what do you think God is? Like, how about that?

47:12 Because like if you think that God, if you if you're like, well, God's a big, you know, guy with a white beard in the sky, I'd be like, yeah, I probably don't think that guy's real either. You know, I don't think that's God either. And then we can find and then we're like, OK, so now we just you thought that I had a term defined a certain way. I'm letting you. I don't now my definition to God is the force that drives life. Love it. And you're like, oh shit, I get behind that. That's like, you know, that's that's cool. You know, like we don't know what it is or how it works, but we just know that, you know, there's something moving life and there's like something that is the universe is growing and like life is progressing and like something's happening. Like, I don't know what it is, but it looks like God to me. You know, like. You know what, like when I think about God, I just think that it's the genius that moves within all things that we can't understand. The oneness.

47:55 Yeah, there's a flow, there's, there's obviously an intelligence, right? We feel the wind, but we never see the wind, right? We know it's there, right. So it's like the, the, the perfect, the perfect way that like plants grow or like one time I did mushrooms, right? This this is what made me. Like I was actually about to say this is this is a great segue into the second day conversation for sure. Yeah. Oh, I watched this story for you. Yeah. So I was doing mushrooms and towards the end of it I had dates in the house. So I was like, I'm hungry, let me go eat a date. Yeah. And I started, I ate, I ate the date and then like, like I, I put the, the whole thing in my mouth and like I chewed around the pit.

48:40 I just kept the pit in my mouth and I ate it. And like I laid down with the pit in my mouth. And all of a sudden I see this diagram 'cause I close my eyes, so I see this diagram and it was like the date seed. Yeah. And every little thing it was encoded with and it just showed like, yeah, the date tree, which is a palm tree, right. And then it showed the, the the fruit, right. And like the benefits of the fruit and like the, the diet, like the tree and like what animals do serve? Do this tree serve? Yeah. And you? See the? You see the oneness. You see the connection between everything. Like the genius that was all put in this one seed to grow a tree, to do everything that a date tree does.

49:21 Yeah, right. And I was like. Fuck, it's amazing, isn't? It now imagine like. Everything. Yeah. Has such a complex code like this? Yeah, and it all works together and it's all. Perfect. And it's all coming from something. Yeah, and to me, that's God. Yeah, I agree. God is beyond our understanding. Brilliant dude. It's beyond our understanding. It's like, you know that intelligence. But that's why I think a lot of people, and I actually remember I had a friend in high school that said this. I didn't even understand what he meant until I thought about it later when I did psychedelics. But like he did shrooms in high school and, and, and he was not, he didn't believe at the time. And I don't know if he does now or not, but like he did shrooms if like 2 weeks after he's like, I swear to God, like I know God, I know God's real. Like I, I, I communicated with God. I know, I know God's real.

50:07 I saw him, I communicated with like and and no one knew what he was talking about. Everyone was like, yeah, OK, let's see how long this last four. And like, you know, granted, if you don't do it like I I think of these things like like lighting a match, you got to still like you need something for it to catch to, you know, you need to you need to put the work into integrated and to bring a piece of wood or, you know, and get and actually light something up. He didn't do that, you know, inside of the day, whatever, But that's what causes the most change is like you. Sometimes people need that help starting that starting the match and they go for it. But everyone has tons of people have that experience. And if they don't want to use the word God, they use something else. But they all describe it the same way. Yeah, exactly.

50:48 I, yeah, I, I, I, the first time I took LSD was also like, I, I, I actually, I didn't see, I didn't feel like it was godliness because I was at like a country bar in Austin, TX listening to music. And also LSD is synthetic. You think that makes a difference? I think it makes a hell of a difference because it's just like everything else that human beings like they try so close to get to like the the by the molecule, like a medicine for example. Right. Well, the root is not synthetic. The root of LSD is from ergot, from a from a mold that grows on wheat. OK, but they still have to like. Yeah, they make it a lab. Yeah, Yeah. They make it in a lab. Yeah. So there has to be something missing. You think of God's perfect design that's in a mushroom. Yeah.

51:30 Compared to LSD, Like it's going to be similar because we tried our best to make it similar. Yeah, but I think that because I I've done, I've done mushrooms, ayahuasca, I've done what's the the cactus? Not peyote, Peyote's cousin is in. Yeah, it's is it? The. Case they call it Watchuma, but it's also called there there's there's like a Watchuma or a it's. Not peyote, mescaline. No, it, it is mescaline. That's that's like how psilocybin is in mushrooms. Mescaline is in peyote and San Pedro. OK, San Pedro's with that beautiful flower. Bro, I fucking sat. I I rolled around. You. You South America or something? I was in South America. Yeah, this was after I did ayahuasca.

52:11 A couple like maybe like 3. I was your first psychedelic. No mushrooms. Mushrooms. And then like in 2014, like bro, I had a house and I had a whole bunch of shit and in 2014 I tore my ACL. OK. No, in 2012 I tore my ACL and. What were you up to in your life at that .2012? I was getting, I just got out the Marine Corps. I was going to college. I was dating this hot girl. Thanks. I was working at A at a gym. OK, Jewish guy on the gym. Oh yeah, Yeah. Always. Yeah, Israeli guy. Israeli, Israeli guy for sure. Yeah. He wears three quarter, wears three quarter length jeans or something like that. Dude, his outfits are crazy.

52:53 Yeah. So I was trying to figure my life out but bro like I was on a pretty good high. Like I like dating that girl and only my own house at like 23. It's awesome. Yeah, bro, and. You were living here before. I was, I was in, I was in Sunrise. I was in, I was in West Sunrise. Yeah. So I was in Fort Lauderdale and what you call it. I was just bro, I was, I was living life good. I was training jiu jitsu, you know, I was making money from the VA with the disability benefits. I was making money from the VA going to school, then I had a a financial aid on top of that and and then I was working at the gym then. Whatever money you were making, I. Had a bunch of fucking money that just kept coming in three months and I was just living. I was living life Great.

53:37 It's awesome going to school and doing jiu jitsu. I was fucking jiu jitsu. Yeah. I hate that I was getting paid all this money. And that's my ACL and that girl. And then that girl broke up with me. And what she said is that she became the man of the relationship. Shit, she said that to you? Yeah, though, because I didn't know, I didn't have a lot of emotional intelligence at that point, right? I'm 23. Yeah. So you imagine, right? I tear my ACL, I I no longer have jujitsu and I was using that to like that. Would that kept the demons away? Sure, because when I came back from Iraq I went on embassy duty, which is like guarded 3 different embassies all around the world. It's considered more relaxed, right? Service is way more relaxed, right? OK.

54:18 But you're guarding embassies, so some shit was to go down. You're it's only 5 Marines in the embassy and they're not even there all the time. Like I have to call them from the house. Yeah. Hopefully they're not out drinking, right. Yeah. Or some trips somewhere you know. Yeah. And then we have to hunker down in the embassy until the fast team comes. The FAST team is like they have these teams of Marines as that that are like on naval ships going up and down the Atlantic and Pacific Ocean just waiting to in. Case anything happens. To an embassy wow right, which is why Benghazi was so fucking stupid because there were fast teams ready to go and the. I don't know who made the call, whether it was the president or Hillary, because Hillary was the depart, the secretary, Secretary of State. So she's head of all the embassies. Yeah, right.

55:05 A fast team could have went in there and helped Benghazi. Easy. You could add a whole fucking platoon of Marines fucking helping getting everybody out. Cause of your question about that, you think that I was thinking about this the other day I was talking, I did a podcast with a retired homicide detective. And one thing that we were talking about was that a lot of times, like the flaws are the one mistake. The mistakes are always super highly accentuated and the winds are never publicized. And so like, you know, Benghazi situation happens and like that's history and then you have 1000 other stories that could have been history that have been successfully prevented. And do you think that it's incompetence urge just like listen, people screw up.

55:50 No one choose 100% and you know, and the fuck ups are just considered like a big deal because they're big deal. Like there's on the line. Bro that is an amazing question and I probably have an answer that you're not really expecting. OK? I think it's just basic human psychology. OK, OK. We are programmed to focus on the negative more than we are the project. Sure. We need like 10 to 20 positive associations for every like one negative association we have for. Someone right, Because if we if we learn how to hyper focus on the negative, it helps keep us alive. Yeah, right. So like right? That's why anxiety, that's why anxiety developed, you know? Correct. And also, are you familiar with epigenetics? A little bit. So epigenetics is a study of like, it's basically how in in DNA and part of it.

56:32 Learn genes right? Yeah, so let's say, let's say somebody's great, great grandmother, every time she passed the Rose Bush, she gets stung by a bee. OK, Her biology associates red flower pain. Yeah, OK, yeah. So now she has all the eggs in her that she will ever have in her entire life. Wow. Right. So that means that in your grandma, there's both your grandma and your mother. Right, right, right. They're both. And totally. Right. So like when your grandma's pregnant, right? It's your mom, but then your mom develops all her eggs when she's in.

57:13 The and we're all developed, right? And my grandmother, yeah. Oh shit. Right, Yeah. You see how deep it goes. OK, so then now the daughter's born. OK. When she passes by red flowers, she's kind of like, yeah, like, I don't like red flowers. Yeah, Right. And then the grandmother may say, oh, it's because I used to get stinged by. Sure. Like, you stay away from them. Yeah. Then that daughter is born, and let's just say something happens to the mom and the grandma, they're not around anymore, right. She goes by red flowers. She immediately like, oh, stay away. Yeah. She doesn't know why. Yeah. Epigenetics. Yeah. Because if you think about it like our bodies are built so that we continue to take care of the next generation.

57:58 Sure, Right. We're trying to do better. So to our survival of the. Species. Yeah, totally. Right. That's why. Like I don't know if your kids vaccinated. The first one is partially, the second one is not OK. My kid got a vaccine injury right where like really kept getting sick. He's having an allergic reaction to these vaccines. He kept getting sick the entire first year of his. Shit, really. Respiratory issues entire first year of his life. When he was born, he got like the whole set of the first, the whole first set. Whole first set right? OK bro you know how it is going to the fucking hospital with your kids. It is painful, OK, because. One of the worst things the.

58:40 Worst things because you can't fix it. Yeah. And they can't speak to say what's wrong with Yeah, yeah. Bro, and you need to fix it. You need to fix it. It's your kid. It's. And dog, one time I remember bro Khalil is sick, don't know what's wrong with him. They're trying to collect a sample of something and they were like, we have to, we have to get his urine. So then we they put like it's called like a, like a condom catheter. They put it over his penis and then they're waiting for him to pee. He didn't pee fast enough. So now they got to put the well can. They just like let him pee. What do they got to wait 5 minutes? OK, we waited hours. Oh yeah, it.

59:20 Wasn't happening. OK, so then they had to stick. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Now me watching my son get a fucking catheter bro I wanted to fry. Yeah, dude, you'd rather you stick, you'd rather you take it, Yeah. Yeah, give it to me. Me a fucking Nope. Yeah. So. So going through this for a year, so then around his first year visit, my friend was like, hey, listen, I don't want to overstep. Yeah, but I think it's the vaccines causing that. OK, I was like, you know what, we have his first year appointment. This doctor been cool as shit with us for the longest. You know, let me go speak to her about this.

1:00:01 So it's during COVID, so only one parent could go in at a time, right? Right. So. Which is also a whole bunch of other bullshit, but OK, yeah, we all go down that rabbit hole because that's too much, Yeah. So I go in, right, because I'm the one with the questions, right? And the mom asked questions too. But you know, I'm, I'm the father. So of course I'm going to go do it. So she's in the car, she's waiting. So the nurse comes in there with four vaccines. He's only supposed to get three. OK. She came in there with an extra polio shot. I come to find out later that the doctor added an extra polio shot to help protect my son from COVID. Without asking me.

1:00:42 What? Without asking me. That was when I brought furious when I found out you. Could have you could have the doctor could have lost, could lose a license for that, No. I don't know. That's a big deal. That's without parents consent. Without my consent, the nurse came in, put the vaccines, we're going to give them these vaccines, and then your doctor's going to come in. She would have told me after the fact. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so fuck you, Doctor Dulito. OK, yeah, fuck that. Yeah, associates. Don't. Really. Yeah. Wow. OK, so in Coconut Creek. Good shit. Do you know? It's OK. It's important, I think for sure. So, so the nurse is like, OK, So then she leaves.

1:01:25 She goes to Doctor Dulito, right? And Doctor Dulito calls my child's mom. She's like, hey, do you know the father's in here? Try not to get your son vaccinated. Are you OK with that? Trying to put us against. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, do whatever the dad says. How did you say yeah? Good for her. Yeah, we support each other, bro. We're. On the same team, Yeah. Important for parents, Yeah. So Doctor Lito comes in there with a fucking attitude. I bet. Right. And she's like, I hear you don't want to get your son vaccinated. And I was like, Doctor Dulito, you know as well as I do that since Khalil has been born, he's been in and out of the hospital. And I think that it's one of those vaccines on the table that is causing it. Yeah, she goes, what, did you hear that in a blog? And I was like, no, it's in the vaccine insert. That's.

1:02:16 On the. Table talking about it says. On the packaging. Side effects on the packaging. It's right there. Yeah, I'm sorry. Most parents don't fucking read that. I didn't read it because we fucking trust you. Yeah, but now I have questions. What the fuck is the problem? Yeah, and. Then she goes, I hate it when you anti vaxxers, I hate it when you anti vaxxers come in here and try to tell me to do my job. As a matter of fact, I believe in vaccines and my son had had the the meningitis vaccine. He's 16, experienced every single side effect. And I told him that he better man up because he's going to. She said that. Word for word he better man up because he's taking the second dose.

1:03:00 I'm like, give me my baby, my baby's medical records. Goodbye. Holy shit dude. Right. It's like you can't ask your doctor's questions without being labeled. And I had a legitimate reason. Yeah, and I'm. What that that story with their kids? A crazy story. That's a crazy thing to be proud of. It's a crazy thing to like, be like. And I did that right. Yeah. You want to hear? Some shit I did that you. Believe in the vaccine more than you, than your love for your son. You're a mom. What the fuck is wrong with you bro? Your son gets sick from this fucking thing. You should be looking, you should be asking questions. No, she has that dogmatic.

1:03:46 Yeah, yeah. And. You could see that when you talk to people like you could see when their eyes get glazed over when they're hearing something that they don't want that they don't want to hear or that they're already not accepting or not believing you're like, you know what it's not even fucking talk worth talking to you. You know like I'll have you what I'm talking to where like I'll be explaining something that is like completely like we could agree with this yes, we agree with that yes. Does that mean that this, No, they're like, OK, you know what, like great, you're not going to, if you don't want to hear it, I'm not going to waste my breath, you know, But like you can tell for sure. You can tell when you're talking to people that like you see that? Let me get another pay-per-view, huh? Let me get another paper. Yeah, you familiar with cognitive dissonance? Yeah, sure. That's what that is. Yeah, well. Dude, that's how our freaking here's something works today.

1:04:26 Dude, our time world is cognitive by the way. I'm a victim of it too though. You know I do that shit all day, dude. You know, things I don't want to hear. I don't like institutional systems. I've never, I've never have because I was never good at them. I never had knew how to navigate my way through school or through interviews or through like application like that. And I'm like, you know what I don't like? And so like when someone tells me I went to Harvard, I'm like, big, big fucking deal. You know, who gives a shit? You know, And like, the truth is that it is a big deal. And it's something that I cannot, like I literally, I just can't do, you know? So like, I understand that there's like that kind of dogma that I have, but I also know myself enough to know like I'm just being an asshole about it. I'm just saying I'm, I'm admitting it like this is what I have that cognitive distance, you know, I want to do that.

1:05:07 And, and I think that that's that's healthy to admit, right? Because we all could be a victim to cognitive distance. If right now you show me another martial art that's more effective and you prove it to me that it's more effective than Jiu jitsu. Let's say you go fuck yourself. Bro yeah, you don't want to hear. 10 years and then don't want to hear it? Yeah. Jiu Jitsu is the best form of martial arts. Everything you can tell me after that, go fuck yourself, yeah? You know what I mean? Yeah. So I understand, I understand. But we're talking about a hobby that I turned into a job, not a child's life. Yeah, and you had to know the difference. You got to know the difference. I know dude I had I this this past week. I I hate doing shit around the house. I'm not handy at all, you know, and I'm and I, I could be if I want to, but it's not familiar to me and I just have a resistance to it.

1:05:56 And so water spraying all over and it's getting under our vinyl thing and we have tile underneath it. So it's like tile. Then there's like water underneath it now and then there's a floorboards and I'm like, I had to fucking rip up these floorboards and like, I don't want to do it. And like every part of my body is telling me I don't want to do it. Like, but I have my wife and I have my two kids at home and I don't want mode coming. And so you know what? I have this cognitive, cognitive dissonance. Suck it up for half an hour for an hour on a Sunday afternoon and just get that shit done and like, and you move on with your life. And I think like, like what you're saying, like when there's a bigger picture on the table, when there's something bigger than just yourself, your kids there and like your family's there, like that's where people get hurt, you know, that's the problem.

1:06:37 Yeah, not for sure. And I think it's very mature for you to have said, like, fuck, I'm not handy. This is not something I'm used to. Yeah, but I have my wife, I have my kids here. Like I got to do something. Yeah. I think that that's a that's a sign of a healthy man. You try, dude. You know, and I think we're all we're all like, there's this this book that sometimes I just pick up a book and I see one thing and I'm like, I take that with me. Yeah, right. There's this book called the the spiritual warrior. OK, I know nothing about the book. OK, I saw the book. I love the title. I opened and it was chapter 10 and it was like the very beginning said most people, and I'm paraphrasing, most people will live their life and no matter who it is will tell you that they wish they could have done this better.

1:07:22 They could have done that better, right? If they got 2 medal of honors, fuck, I could have got the third one, right? Maybe I should have just jumped on the grenade like that. Third time. Yeah, right. And no matter what it is, you feel like you didn't do good enough. And the truth is that no matter what, given any situation and who you were during that time, you did the very best that you could do. Yeah. No matter what, you did the best I think. It's the way you got to look at life, right? Yeah, 'cause otherwise you spend your entire life beating yourself. Up beating yourself up for what and. Not and that you can beat yourself up enough that you don't even tried a certain point. Like if you say like I'll never be able to do it, then you'll never try to do it. You'll. Never try it. And that's where a lot of people get stuck. Yeah, a lot of people get stuck right there.

1:08:03 That's why I'm so happy I started coming to gym. I'm so legit, dude. Like because I was like, I don't, I, I didn't know that I, I, I was, I was scared shitless, dude. I mean, you know. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah, crazy. And I'm like, I don't know, maybe I'll hate it, you know? Maybe. I'll I I love how you just walked in and you committed. I did a class. Something, yeah, but. I just, I just see that I liked it, yeah. Yeah, because if you think about like an established man, right? Like you have your family, you have your three jobs, right? You're a husband, you're the king of your household, and you have to walk in this fucking gym, right? And be at the bottom of the totem pole. Oh, yeah, right. And me, I'm usually a little bit harder on people when they first come in because I, I, I like to weed out people. Yeah.

1:08:51 Right. I need somebody that's going to be able to take like I'm because sometimes I get in, you know, me, I get in marine mode sometimes it's like, I need you to do this, right? Because at the end of the day, right, I'm showing you a martial art, OK? The whole purpose behind a martial art is for you to defend yourself. You can hurt people with this. So sometimes I got to really be fucking serious. Put your hand there or you're going to get hurt. Yeah. Right. Stop doing that. OK, I have to be rough sometimes, right? And I just, I, I love how, like I've seen the difference from you from day one till now, right? It's like you're you, you, you.

1:09:32 You could tell you were very uncomfortable at 1st and now it's like you're so willing to jump in the fire no matter who you're going against. Yeah, 'cause I would say Mike Knight is one of the most dangerous people to be standing in. That guy's an assassin, right? Yeah, Chris is a nut. And he doesn't take it. He doesn't take it easy. Either No, he doesn't. I'm the damn coach and Mike, don't take it easy on me. Right. It you know 40 laws of power, never I'll shine the Master Mike's like fuck that. Yeah, I did. Story that I used to a lot. Sometimes I'll jump into MMA, right? I'll do sparring sometimes, OK? Mike has never tapped me out to this point. OK. So we doing this drill where like I have my back against the wall and he's on my legs and that's how we start.

1:10:14 So boom, we're starting and I'm trying to like fight my way up and he's pulling me down and and then I feel his weight go backwards. So as soon as he did that, I'd lunge forward and he was just trying to bait me into the guillotine. As soon. As I lunge forward I feel his hand go around my neck and I was like. Fuck. You about to have it? Bro all the. Air. Left. My lung and I like and I tapped them like you motherfucker. And this is prior to him doing that. He's like hitting me. And Mike does not have a light hand. Yeah. He's how you feel. I'm like, oh, shit, I got to give up. I got to be able to fight. Yeah. And then I could give it to you.

1:10:55 Wow, man. So Mike is a person. He's not going to take it easy on you. So for you to go just toe to toe with him like you're trying the shit that I'm teaching you, like I love it because that's the sign of somebody that's going to be good. They're going to be committed to this. They're going to they're going to do well in this. Like the things I'm teaching is for a purpose. Yeah. Because Doug, Jiu Jitsu will help you out in your life, period. Yeah, with your problem solving. Like you have to solve problems under duress. That's what jiu jitsu is. Yeah. It's a human chest mask which you solve problems under duress using your body. Yeah. Which is super dangerous. Yeah, and literally every movement means something. Every single motion means something. It means something, yeah. And the other thing, by the way, the, I think one of the more valuable things is learning under enormous pressure how to keep breathing or trying to keep breathing, because that also is the skill that carries over when I have a phone call, a sales call and the customer is reading me out and I don't know, take a deep breath and you're like, you know what, I'm getting pummels right now.

1:11:52 I just got, I got to figure out a way to just like wordsmith my way out of this shit, you know, and. Because how you do one thing, you do everything. Yeah. So if you're learning this, if you're doing this with your body. You're interdisciplinaries, Yeah. It just goes across everything. Yeah. Yeah, so I've already seen the difference. Yeah. Which is I'm, I'm, I'm proud of it. Like I'm gonna keep. I, I, I, I do. I love this sport, dude. Yeah, I love this sport. This is wait till like when you get like your blue belt, you start giving the people a fucking hard time. It's going to be I can't wait. I can't wait. Yeah. Yeah. So you're you're you're doing, you're doing well. You're progressing as you. Should. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see, yeah. You got to keep it up. I, I also think the I, I think also another value that's worth diving into is the value of playing, of fighting up and playing up in anything you do that like playing people better than you.

1:12:34 Like the reason why I've, I'm, I'm enjoying this because I know that Chris is being the shadow of me or Mike's being the shadow of me. And if they're not, there's a reason rather they're not. You know, my mom used to like whenever you play games together, like she'd beat us and then you're like one day and you know, 8910, like one day you're going to beat me. When you beat me, you're going to know that you're really good at this. You know, you're going to get a really good. And then we did beat her, you know, 1415 years old and you're like, ha, ha, you know, we're better than she is. And he's like, we earned it. Like, you know, like that, that like that was the best feeling in the world. And if you're playing below your level 2, like if you're just like, you know, if you're, if you're, if you're punching below your weight, like you're not growing from that. No, OK, so let me let me just tell you about the jitsu, right?

1:13:18 Because that makes sense. But I just want to let you know something else too. Once you get your blue belt right. I like you. How? Does it go by the way? Because I don't know what what point that is perfect. White, blue, purple, brown, black. White, blue, purple, brown back so. So the average time to get to blue belt is from six months to a year and a half. OK. So usually like if you come in with wrestling background, like usually in six months you'll be get your blue belt, right. But if you're coming straight off the street like you did, I got mine in a year and a half. I came out the Marine Corps, but my one of the old school Brazilian things to do was to keep people back for a while. It's like he had me competing against blue belts when I was a white belt and still didn't promote me till six months after.

1:13:58 Really. Yeah. How do you feel about that He. Looked. It was frustrating at the time. Yeah, now I don't give a fuck. I mean, I can't get another belt now. Oh yeah. Still goes white, blue, purple, brown, black. Now jujitsu the system itself, since there's only 5 belts, you got to spend time at each belt. Yeah, because as a blue belt you should be whooping the ass of every white belt that you come in contact with. OK, If you're not, then. You're not there yet. You're, you have some work to do because there's a reason why you got the blue belt. But if you're not like, handling white belts like you should, Yeah, right then.

1:14:40 Because these are all ranges. So like if you're like towards the advanced end of a white belt or the beginning end of a blue belt, hypothetically you guys might be pretty close. Yes, in in skills. Yes, but once you settle into your blue belt you should be handing. Right. Exactly. So at that point, when you're settled, you should not be at the bare tip of blue belt. You should be, you know, pretty. In most cases. In most cases. Because let me tell you, some people, This is why, like I tell you to just focus on triangles because a white belt sometimes will latch onto a move that they do so well, they can't do anything else. Yeah, do that move so well. Right. So like the day that you triangle Mike. Yeah, right. I was proud because I know Mike was just letting you fuck around, but when it started getting tight, he actually tried to escape. But you, you, you, you actually were able to finish it because of something that you did that was correct. Yeah.

1:15:33 Right, because there's a thing like, you know, like me, I'll let you guys get me into shit so I could escape out of it, right? Sure, but if you do everything as prescribed, guess who's not escape for you? Yeah. And. You know, he as an instructor, like, I don't feel like I need to win every single match. And if I let myself get into danger or you put me in danger and I'm unable to get out of it with something that I taught you, I feel proud. Yeah. I feel like a proud dad. Yeah. You know, like, if I'm, if I'm like, alright, like I'm gonna let Efron get me in the fucking triangle and you finished that bitch. I'm like damn. Right, because presumably you know how to get out of that. You taught me. Time out I got.

1:16:14 This do it awesome jiu jitsu. Yeah, yeah. Dude, I love Yeah so. Oh, recording. Yeah, we're recording. We're back, we're back. You got a beer on my finger. Cheers too. Cheers. Mother, hey, I just take pause. I just wanted to try and express some gap, Oh, express some gratitude for you having me at your house. Oh, don't be like that, man. Bro, it's always good to to express some gratitude. Yeah, man, I'm, I'm really happy you're here, man, because. You didn't have to, you know. Hey, you know what dude, it's first of all, I love sharing, I love hosting and you know dude, like, I mean we spent 3 or 4 mornings each other week, you know?

1:16:55 I mean, I'm happy to have you over, dude. Chris, when Chris was here, he was so funny, man. We were recording out here and yeah, there's no and there's notebook and he comes on taking notes of things he wanted to talk about. We were smoking the whole time, like. Are you ever going? To get out to these notes and he's like, God, it's already the moment, it's already gone. I can't forget about it. That's one thing I love about jujitsu is because it reminds me of the Marine Corps and that like you meet people from different part walks of life and then I've curated my gym to where it's like, assholes won't survive. You know artistical people won't survive, right? If you're there, it's because you're of like mind or you won't survive then. Yeah, you could tell.

1:17:39 And like we, we talk a lot of shit. There's a lot of play, but there's a lot of seriousness when it comes to training and we take care of each other like a family. So there's like some of these invaluable relationships that I build coming out of there. And I appreciate that because, bro, I didn't grow up Mr. Popular. I became Mr. Popular quote, UN quote, when I got out the Marine Corps. And it's like, oh, everybody loves me because I'm a fucking veteran. Yeah, you know, everybody loves me because I'm a fucking black belt. You know, I'm not used to, I'm not used to having so many people that that like me. Yeah. In one place because I'm usually the one that's misunderstood.

1:18:19 And when I realizes that a lot of people. I misunderstood. I misunderstood and we all just come together and in that misunderstanding and that being misunderstood, we find understanding amongst each other because it's like we were misunderstood because we were, we were in the wrong areas, we were in the wrong tribe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because a tribe is is is a group of people that come together that have similar values for a common purpose, right? That's what Tribe is. And this has to be just a common purpose. Is getting better just being better? Being. Better human being. And yeah, dude, that's what I was going to say, man. I and I, I've said this probably four or five times in the podcast already, but Eric, dude, the one of the first classes and you, you snapped me out of this because I get, I get proud, right? And one of the first classes, he was like, OK, let's roll. And like, he sits like this on the floor with his back to me. I'm like, what the fuck, man?

1:19:05 Get in here, man. Like, what are you doing? And you said, Hey, we're all here to learn and we're all here to teach each other. If he's sitting on the floor with his back to you, I swear to God he could handle it, you know? And I was like, yeah, man, like I got to check my ego. Like I was like, like, you know, like all he's trying to do is help me learn. And this is my second or third class. And I was like, and I was like, everyone here, like you're not here to, to when you're here to, you're here to get better and to teach. And like, I was like, that is so that's why I was like, this place is awesome. That's, that's, that's when I that's when I was like, we're sticking around this. So happy you're doing it. Just like she's going to get a membership when the year is over, closer, closer to home instead of driving out, you know, 25 minutes in the morning and each way.

1:19:45 And I'm like, I want to say yes, but I'm not. I, I can't, I, I can't leave now. Like, like I'm in, I'm in, I'm in, I'm screwed. Dude, you got me, man. You got me. The people, even guys like like dude Alex, like I big Alex that, that with awesome hair and whatever. Like, you know, I, I don't know if we'd be best friends in the street, but he is so respectful and so clear and like teaching me. Oh really, dude? Great dude, love Alex, great dude, great dude. And I was just like. Just awesome. Yeah. I really, I really, I love it. So do you compete? Last time I competed was last January. Really. There's another Marine who was a cop and bro, I went to go grab him and like, he, he like, waved his hands like this, like trying to like get away from me. Bro.

1:20:33 His fucking middle finger went like that deep into my eye. I don't know if I've met you yet. No, because you started in March. Yeah bro, I had the biggest black eye. Really. Yeah the biggest black guy I'm like how the fuck do I get this from jiu jitsu? But so I don't I don't compete very often because there's this saying where like you can't serve 2 masters, OK, right. And where I where I the principal of that is like, yo, you can't be a great coach and a great competitor at the same time. Yeah, right. I'm 39, bro. Like I'm sure if I hop on some TRT, which I'm. It's close here the. Phone with what? What's holding you back? Because my testosterone's at 400. What's supposed to be? Medically they say that this is OK you. Don't want to be in the medical.

1:21:18 OK, Ariel. This is like average, like, oh, the average man has 400 testosterone. You're fine. You're 39, you're good. But no, like they don't, they don't account for the lifestyle where bro, I'm lifting weights. Yeah, I'm doing jujitsu with fucking 29 year old Mike Knight, who's in the best shape of his life. Yeah. Dude. Right, or, or or or fucking Alex who's ��250? The idea, right? Like I have to be able to compete with these guys in my gym. I don't need to go anywhere. Right. You don't need to be average, you need to be above average, do you? Give me 800 to. Be 1500 all crazy.

1:22:00 I don't know give me 8 hundreds like yeah, because what I'll do is because I don't have a big ego when it comes to jiu jitsu right, But I I I'm competitive as shit. So like Mike Knight, right like him Alex, a guy name I call Luigi. Who the who's his name is Danny, right? Like so many of my purple belts are so fucking good that it's a competition every time I go with them, whether they're more athletic than me or they're like better at a certain aspect of jiu jitsu than me, like we're going at it right? Like sneaky black belt tricks keep me alive. But it's like, bro, I'll go like the other day I went with like this guy named Josh Marta.

1:22:43 He's a cop and he's like really good. He's one of our best competitors. I don't know if you know him because he doesn't come the. Morning class Thanos. Thanos is amazing. That guy is huge. Yeah but I love Thanos. You, you 2 are like my favorite. Jews have very similar mindset. Said Thanos is a fucking asshole. Is he? I don't know. I, I, I've, I've talked to him for 30 seconds. I never got a chance. Because I was, I started my podcast. And if you look up Drew Phoenix podcast, Oh, you have them. It's me and Thanos. Really. Yeah. We did the first episode together. OK. But that deal, I had a deal with a guy that he was gonna trade for, like his podcast studio time. Yeah. And that deal fell throughout the episode 1. So man. So I'm gonna build a podcast studio in the gym. Are you?

1:23:24 Yeah, dude, I'm gonna use it then. All right? Hell yeah. Drew Phoenix. No, that's not Drew Phoenix. Podcast. Drew Phoenix Podcast. DRUDR. U ah shit I right So you were rolling with Luigi you said yeah 88 pep 88 episodes dude. No. The Phoenix podcast, I'm sorry. Drew Phoenix. You got to find it OK. Yeah, I'll send it to you. Just just text me right now. Say send me podcast. Yeah. Oh, so what'd you call it? What was I saying? Oh, so like I went with like 4 of of, of like my good guys, yeah. Bro I was dying on the floor afterwards really. And bro, I was out for like 2 fucking days really. I had to recover.

1:24:10 Yeah, right. And my body hurts, so my back hurts, so my knees. Do you do any of the cold the coach punch shit or anything? I like cold plunge. I think cold plunge is fucking stupid. The only thing I like about the cold plunge is afterwards. Like, I feel like mentally great, yeah. But everyone says it's about. Yeah, but but like as far as recovery is concerned, from that fucking sauna. Yeah. Is there sauna? Oh fuck yeah. Shit, let me know when you want to go in there. I'll I'll fucking set it up for you. Really. It's a benefit that I don't tell most people about because I don't own it. XPE owns it and we can use it, but you know, it's their shit. So like I don't try to take advantage. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm already using their weights even though I pay half the rent so I'm not really like. I don't.

1:24:50 Yeah, I don't feel too bad about that, dude. Yeah, definitely not. Yeah, yeah, they have cool. They have great athletes hanging out there, right? Yeah, bro, because they they train, they train guys trying to get into the NFL. And then when those guys get into the NFL, they come back and train during the offseason. So that's why like this January, February, March, you'll see there's going to be a lot of fucking giant football players. Yeah, I remember March towards the end of the towards the end when I first started, there are a bunch of athletes running. Around, yeah. So you'll see them. They're going to start. They're going to come in in January, that first Monday, back after New Year's, you'll see them. And it's going to be packed until March. Crazy. That's cool. Time in the gym, It's cool. To see, Yeah, that was nice, right? For the most part, for the most part, they're because it's like, I think a lot of them have the understanding that, hey, you run around with the football and like you bump into each other and you're like wrestle a little bit.

1:25:37 Like we have skills over here. Now granted, if those guys get skills. They're you're fucked. Terrifying. Yeah. The problem with all professional martial art athletes, whether it's MMA or Jiu Jitsu, is that they don't get paid enough. You imagine somebody making millions per contract and say hey you could come make fucking 10 grand doing jiu. Jitsu. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, in a match, if you're lucky, yeah, you know, you could get 10 grand in a may fight you. Know it's a really interesting aspect of the sport. I I wonder if Paramount putting all the money into it is going to change it. And now Arab countries are putting a lot of money into it too.

1:26:17 It's absolutely going to change it. Will we see good money in our lifetime? Maybe towards the end because you have to think right. When was the NFL created? The NFL was huge. Immediately wasn't. It no. No, you this year. You like martial arts. More people than I've ever dreamed of follow or participate in it. Not for sure. It's huge now. Yeah, because, OK, in 1992, that's when they hosted the first UFC. Let's see which art martial art is the best. Yeah. But then a lot of people are like, yo, that's human cock fighting because there were no rules whatever. And then when Dana White and the Fertitta brothers took it over and incorporated rules and bought in the boxing Commission and all of that, that's when it became a mainstream sport, right?

1:27:02 So. Share Open SO recording. Is the recording. Yes, we are. Yeah, we're good. Yeah. So that's when it became a mainstream sport. So now we're talking about like. It's taking 20 years for it to, like, grow. Yeah, so that's why that's why people don't get paid a lot now. Yeah, NF LS over 100 years old, right? It's got to be. It's got to be. It has got to be. So it had like 100? And boxing is old as fuck too. Yeah. So like and boxing or decent money in it, you know. Yeah. Oh yeah, boxing. You could get paid a lot more money doing boxing than you would ever do MMA. Yeah, ever. Yeah, Like Conor. McGregor Contracts. Dude, yeah. So like, you know Conor McGregor, right? He was in our lifetime. Yeah. Conor McGregor changed the game because he was the first MMA fighter to get $1 million. To fight, really.

1:27:50 Like contractual, yeah, yeah, $1 million for this. Yeah. And this is 2016. And that's nothing, by the way, like not to be speaking, dude, but. For MMA fighter, yeah, it's crazy. These guys that I trained, they get paid like 300 to to show up, 300 to win. Yeah bro, it is. It is criminal, Yeah it is, but there's not a lot of money in the sport yet. That's why I feel bad for, you know, like there are dudes that like are literally professional fighters that like spent decades of their lives doing this. And you know when their when their career is done, they'll have a penny to their name. It's sad, you know? And you have a great skill, you know, if you want to talk about skill, skill. And by the way, it's entertaining as hell too. If you want to talk about like commercial appeal and value, dude, for sure it is. And you know why?

1:28:34 Part of the reason is taboos. I I think that people are looking at it more now like an art than they call than like a cock fight. Yeah. Well, look at like. Absolutely, Yeah, This is this is a sport, you know, you're watching and you're like, like, dude, my my friends were watching and it happens to be you could tell like, for example, like this is like what's his name when Islam just fought? You can tell like who is appreciating what component of the sport based on what people thought of the fight. Same thing with DDP when he fought Chermayev. You know, like I was like, this guy's, I was like, Chermayev's crazy, all my friends. Like this is the most boring fight I've ever seen. I'm like grapples. You. Grapples you. Know. DDP taking it this whole time. He's he won five rounds. I'm like, this guy should not be alive right now. You know, like, yeah, it's crazy. It's really cool.

1:29:18 It's definitely crazy. And then if you think about like, I'm glad you talked about like the different, like people appreciate in different aspects because as an MMA fighter, it's not like a like a football player, right, If you're a quarterback. Yeah. All you like, you train to know routes to throw the ball, to scramble in and out of the pocket, to stay in the pocket like you like. It's one specific skill of the quarterback, yeah. And the running back has a specific skill, right? And the cornerback. And it's all compartmentalize MMA. There's no such thing as that. And. If you do, you don't make it. No, right. You have to know everything. Yeah, because back in 1992, when nobody knew jujitsu, if you knew jujitsu, you're fucking everybody up. Yeah, right.

1:29:59 But now the American wrestling comes in, and the jujitsu and the fucking sure, the Taekwondo and the boxing like Ilia Taporia, the Taporia brothers, and they're boxing for MMA. And you know that he apparently, allegedly he says that he only started training boxing when he was like 17 or 18 and he was doing jiu jitsu and told that like jiu jitsu is a real sport apparently or like a real skill. Bro you never I've never seen him do jiu jitsu. Yo go back and watch the pori. There's a video where Taporio is like flowing through different submissions. Yeah, he was fucking up. What's his name? Who's that lunatic? Oh God. Anti Semite loves it. Like loves loves Nazis. Shit. He just lost a bunch of fights, but he was looking really good for a long time. You know what I'm talking about.

1:30:41 Dana White got pissed off him recently. What are you? Talking about he fought him before the title. Real country guy. Real country guy. Real country guy. I don't know his. Name that nasty is his nickname. Bryce Mitchell. Bryce Mitchell. Google WFC Fighter Country. Bryce Mitchell Mirab and Corey Sandhagan come up first. Why I I could, I could, I could understand more. Rob, Corey Sanhagan, I don't know. I don't know, dude, I think it's just association that people look up people that just do my white, you know, white dude, that's, you know, fighting like that could be a country, country lunatic. But yeah, dude, his jujitsu was crazy there.

1:31:24 And you know what else, dude? Armand who's getting keeps getting passed over for a title, dude. Armand is amazing. Why does he keep getting paid? You see, it's Paddy versus Gaichi for, for, for the for the belt. And he just defended the number one spot again. Because UFC cares more about putting ass in seats than being fair. So do you think that goes with the money component when there's more asses in the seat, there's more potential money, more revenue and then you can pay the fighters more? So like long term it's better. But like Connor put asses in seats which is why he got. The $1,000,000 contract. Because This is why I tell my fighters I'm like, yo, you can't just be a good fighter. Is he entertaining? You need to be entertaining, but you could be the most entertaining fighter if you get on the mic and you can't.

1:32:05 You don't know how to, like, sell yourself. Yeah. Then like, OK, I got Ozzy, right. Ozzy is one of my pro fighters. Ozzy is actually a black Jew. OK. Like born in Israel. Cool. Like his dad is from Atlanta, I believe. But like, went to Israel and like, they have like, a community there. Lives in Israel still born Jewish. Born there in Israel. Yeah. Ozzy when he gets on the mic, bro, it's magic. Because he's a salesman, dude. Bro, yeah. And bro, if there was his first professional fight, it was just in the height of the Israel Palestine like, like it might have been like October, the end of October when he fought, right?

1:32:49 So it was like fresh. And I don't want to butcher what he says. Just look up Ozzy a Boyd and his post fight speech was fucking beautiful. Yeah, because he had the Israeli flag strapped on his back and he was like, listen, like what's fucked up? What's wrong is wrong. And like the way that he broke down what was going on, He's just like, yo, he's like, I just don't want no more killing. Yeah, let's get to some some resolution. Like, yeah, it was fucking beautiful. Like everything this man says on the mic is, is, is is amazing. Yeah. And also he's a showman when he's inside the cage, like he likes to show off. Yeah. He's really good at fighting. His record doesn't reflect it right now. OK, what about? It what about it? Oh, wait.

1:33:32 The other thing I heard people talking about MMA, about UFC in general, MMA, is that record, like an undefeated record doesn't mean as much as what boxing does. Like Charles Oliveira, he said 12 losses or something like that. You know, like everyone thinks Olivera is like a, like a great, you know? Because in MMA, all you got to do is string together like four wins, 4 impressive wins. If you knock four people out in a row, you're MMA God for that time period. Yeah, Right. So you could go on a losing streak as long as you get that 434 in a row. Yeah. You're fine, Still working on that? Yeah. Yeah. He's have a lot of luck, dude. Wow. He's still, he's still fighting. Yeah, we just went to Atlanta and we lost the fight.

1:34:13 Yeah. Do you know, like how much do you study these? How often do you study these fights? Do you study the opponents before the fights? After. Because I, we were talking before I I did a pre. I'm going to do another podcast hopefully after. I hope you win Sydney, because my friend Joe's is his trainer, his weight lifting trainer and great dude. By the way, I should introduce you to him. You'd love him. He's Cuban and Venezuelan. Great dude. Also Marine or Navy, one of the two. OK. And so either he's cool or he's not. Yeah, he's cool anyway, but he he's cool or he's not. The different branches of service talk shit about it. Yeah, for sure, I did for sure. So he so he so Cindy and I were talking and I was like, dude, you how you're the guy you're fighting. What's he good at?

1:34:58 Because like the last fight that Cindy lost, he was getting elbowed non-stop and he didn't have any answer to it. And like he was like kind of getting like control on top. Like as far as jiu jitsu goes, he's keeping control. But like the guy just kept on like doing more damage to him and he didn't have any answer to it. And he? Wasn't cut by Bellator. You're talking about the black guy? Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he got cut by Bellator and. Now the guy he had on the floor is really fucking good, really. He's very crafty with his jiu jitsu. He's fucking amazing dude. So for Sydney, be able to to control him like that. Yeah, so he's like, I felt like my control, but controlling him was like enough to like get the win. And it wasn't because it went down to just. MMA 2012, Sydney would have won. Yeah, but now, OK, so the thing about it is like the judges came from boxing, right?

1:35:46 Because it's part of the boxing Commission. So a lot of the judges, they don't have an in depth understanding of MMA, which is what Dana White's gripe is about the judges was what what especially Joe Rogan's gripe is about the judges. So judging back then, Sydney would have won that fight, right? But around like mid 2010, sorry, like 2015, 2016 around there, yeah, they started to judge what the guys doing on the bottom because they realized that playing a guard in jiu jitsu is just as effective as being on top. So, like, you're not gonna judge Charles Oliveira from being on his back, right, because he's fucking elbowing you.

1:36:27 He's working himself to a triangle. He's gonna end up on your back. Yeah, like, you have to. Yeah, you have to, to, to and. His back is an advantage to him. Is an advantage to him. Yeah, right. So the guy Sydney fought is the same thing. That guy kept elbowing him. He kept doing shit to Sydney, so Sydney was not. And if Sydney wasn't causing any damage, right? So I was so I was like, dude, but if you studied this guy before, you would know that he would do that, no. Well, here's the thing. This there there's a there's a double edged sword when it comes to studying somebody. OK, I forgot which fighter GSP. OK. Yeah, GSP. Let's go. Nothing.

1:37:08 We are all good just closing a couple of windows that we don't need because apparently it's overheating. Shit. OK, You all good? OK. Yeah, GSP. So GSP, him and his coaches refuse to let GSP fight unless there's six months in between fights. Really to? Recover being not to recover. The reason being is that it takes you 6 months to adapt and be able to, I can't think of the word I'm trying to use big words, but for you to show new skills, yeah, for you to be able to confidently use new you. Know the holes in your game too.

1:37:48 Yeah. And to use new skills, it's six months, OK, to battle against what you're talking about. Like they could study GSP in one fight and they're like, oh, all he does is wrestle and this is how he does it. But he's had six months to develop a new game. So if you stay married to the idea that he's going to do every time he steps with his right leg, he's going to take a punch and shoot because he's been showing that in his last fight, his next fight, he's going to step with the left leg, throw a hook and then shoot. Yeah, you know, he's going to do an overhand and then do a shoot. I wonder if that's happened with Pereira and Uncle of the second time because Pereira finished him in a minute. Dude. I mean, and I it doesn't. It didn't even look like Uncle was at all ready for anything. True. And you know, Pereira said that that first fight, he was sick, injured about it. He was injured.

1:38:31 It showed. That second fight, he's like, I'm gonna fuck. Yeah, you saw it. We just fucking went out there. He's like, let's go. Yeah, the first round did. I was so happy because, yo, I didn't like, I didn't like Alex at first because I liked Izzy. Yeah. But then after his whole Izzy beef stopped. Yeah. I fucking became such a fan bro. When he did comes out, he's just like with that music and then he shoot the arrow like. Dude, my crazy, my first fight that I watched that got me to go to the gym was UFC 300 was I watched the IT was Holloway Gaichi that that huge knockout dude. And I watched that and I was losing my mind.

1:39:14 And then the next and then the next fight, Pereira fights Hill and like I just saw a five round or was it three or five round slugfest, right. And then Pereira just assassinates him and I'm like. What is this? Is that why he pushed the reference? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, because he got like a ball. Tab. And he's like, he's like, come on, I got this. I'm OK, yeah. It's amazing. I was, I I, I haven't missed a fight since. I haven't missed a fight, you know, like a fight card since then. Dude, I like dude, I was like, this sport got me, man. I'm this sport got me, man. It's amazing. It's a, it's a, a big blessing. It's an honor for me to be like a coach in the sport. And I just, I love being in this environment and I love being around warriors. Yeah, you know, because there there's a guy who wrote a book, Robert Moore, the king warrior magician lover. And he talks about how men have 4 archetypes that that develop our psyche.

1:40:05 And the way, the easiest way to understand is look at all the Ninja Turtles, OK, OK, so you have king, warrior, magician, lover. OK, now all of the Ninja Turtles, their base is a warrior because, you know, they they that's what they do. They're warriors. But Leonardo King, right? He issues orders. He's the leader. Yeah, Rafael is the warrior. He fucking takes action. He's one of the fight and die for what he believes in. Yeah. Michelangelo lover. He fucking loves what he's doing. Yeah. Donatello magician. He has fucking skills, right? He's always coming up with some crazy inventions. And you need to you got to focus on each of them. Right. Usually though, you gravitate towards 2. Me. I've been a warrior lover for my entire fucking life, and now I've had to transition to being a king because I'm a leader of the gym, right? Right, so.

1:40:51 Totally different experience. Totally different experience. So like to be a warrior, right? I talked about this in, in, in the the podcast with Thanos and he gave me a little push back, right? Because he doesn't like it. He like like he thinks like, oh, being associated with a warrior, like, oh, you're trying to be like big like, yeah. And that's not what I mean when I talk about a warrior. It's just somebody who like very basically, like you come to a mat in a padded room and you sit there and you try to hurt your friends. And in the act of hurting your friends, you become closer, OK. And you laugh and joke and you go through it, you know, because what happens at the end of every practice, we sit around and talk a little shit. Yeah. You know, so it's like some people don't understand that. Like, I was dating.

1:41:36 So during the pandemic, I used to live with with this, this girl who was the purple belt cool named Diane. She was an artist and she, I had an apartment in Fort Lauderdale. My family had fell on some hard times, so I said they could go to the apartment. Diane needed a roommate. So I was like, OK, fuck it. Like, I'll go, I'll go be her roommate because I never looked at her once and was attracted to her. She's an attractive girl, but I never was attracted to her because a lot of the girls I train with, like, I'm not attracted to. Yeah. It's like you get sweaty and stinky just like I never make it weird. Yeah. Even though sometimes like I may like push off and touch a titty or something. Not like I'm like never like Oh my God.

1:42:16 I. Just touched a titty. It's just like, yeah, sorry, you know, so, so Diane, you know, she had a place and she is a nice place and she needed the roommate. I was like, oh, let me do it, you know, get my family, my, my apartment. And that and, and the pandemic had just happened right after we moved in. So she's dating this dude, right? And she, she's an artist. So she had artist friends and she had jujitsu friends and she was like OK all I need him to do is meet my jiu jitsu friends because he passed the test of my artist friend. So that night me and Diane literally try to beat the shit out of each other and she had a dinner party so that the jiu jitsu friends can meet the guy. And me and Diane were excited talking about like, oh, when you did this, I tried this.

1:43:06 I tried that because it was really a chess match. Like I wasn't trying to use strength on her. Like it was really like skill for skill, like going back and forth, back and forth. And Diane's really good at triangles and arm bars. OK, fucking really good. So like you escape on me like oh shit, like I'm out like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I try to throw her and she did this and you know, it's fucking crazy. And we're like laughing about it. That guy was at the table with us, visibly uncomfortable. Yeah, I didn't catch on until afterwards. Like, oh shit, he's not going to like that. Yeah. Bro literally couple days after that conversation he just disappeared. Yeah, wouldn't talk to her because he just couldn't like. Hey, couldn't deal with it. By the way. I, I, I kind of hear that if you're, if you're not part of the world, I could see how it's like the most platonic thing in the world and like the most professional.

1:43:50 It's, it's intimate and professional at the same time. Like, and I think that everyone understands that like there's like space that's like typically not like, you know, I give like the lazy river dude. Like the lazy river, you always end up like bumping up against someone that like, yeah, like, oh, it's like I'm a little close to like me hanging out and like, yeah, you know, I never thought of like hanging out like to each other. Like my arm is like bumping into you. I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. Like, you know, old grandma or hot or hot girl, like sorry about that, you know, but like other like fat dude in Disney World, you know, like sorry, but like Jujitsu's too is like, like you also like ascribe me to the fact that like we're going into the gym to fight our bodies like on the line and like, nothing we're doing is like disrespectful or like, like this is like a place of like something art.

1:44:35 Like this is a place of art. Yeah, right. But like if you're not in that, you're like, what the fuck is this shit? You know? Like this is weird as hell. Between his legs. Like I'm, I'm, I'm teaching you triangles, right triangles, Literally me in between your. Legs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, you choking me with your legs? Yeah, you're fucking nuts are on my right, but do I ever think about like, oh shit, fucking Efron's nuts are right? I know. You're thinking about. No, I'm. Thinking like, you know, if I don't get out of here, I'm fucking dead. Yeah, yeah, I guess, you know, that's like, it's like when things are harder, you don't worry about the littler things, you know, like when things are more difficult. And that's why when things are too good, you get like wimpy, you know, like complaints and shit like that. You're like, like, how come you don't hear about like, you know, and like, I've heard this argument about America and like other countries, like you didn't see like LGBTQ parade, you know, parades in like Colombia, like they're not as rich as we fucking are.

1:45:26 That everyone's just walking around being like, I want to express my sexuality here. You're like, yeah, you're like, dude, we got like to put like food on the table. Like we got like, I got to get water for my family. Yeah, yeah. You know, like we got to do shit, you know, like I'm not worried about this shit, you know? So I think that, you know, it's, I think that all this is the same thing when there's different stakes, different things mean different things. But I also think that you have to be in that world. I get where that dude's coming. From No, absolutely. You know, that's why, like, when people start talking about privilege, right? Yeah, I can understand what you're talking about, right? OK Like, it's like white privilege, right? I understand what white privilege means, OK. However, I think that when you travel around the world, you gain a, a really good perspective, right? And it helps guide you in a, in a great way. So, for example, I've never been to a house in America that didn't have a fridge, right?

1:46:21 I've never been to a house in America that didn't have a microwave. Yeah. I've been to a few houses, a couple of houses I know. You're saying? I know you're saying yeah, yeah, you're smart if you don't have a microwave, but a stove? Even if you're laying on a fucking air mattress, there's a stove. Yep, there's a fridge. Yep, you probably have either an AC or a heater. You'd probably have one of the other. Probably. Bro I've been to I've lived 2 1/2 years in Africa combined right crazy. I'll station in China as well. OK OK I seen what real fucking poverty is buddy. Africans are the most hospitable people that I've ever been around in those two countries.

1:47:02 And I was in Guinea and I was in Niger W Africans, super hospitable. I was rich in their eyes. Yeah, OK. And they used to invite me to their mud huts to fucking eat. Amazing. Right, because I took a liking to their culture, I figured out that, like in Africa, it's not like, oh, I'm black and you're not. Yeah. It's like I'm from the Susu tribe. You're Mandingo. You're you're you know, there's a different tribe. Yeah. I think of the names right now. Dulani, Right. There's like different tribes. That's how they identify themselves. Right. OK, So with me, they're like, oh, like you like us, like, come to my house. Yeah. So like the wife would bring, like, a plate full of couscous and just throw a fucking hand on top and throw a bunch of sauce.

1:47:48 Yeah. And it's like a big ass dish. And it's like, you're there, you're there, you're there. Let's and let's fucking eat. Let's go, you know? So I'm in somebody's mud Hut doing this. There is no AC here. Yeah, some people have electricity. Some people have a water bottle that's stuck on top in a hole that when the sun shines on it, the water, no, it doesn't heat it up. The water creates the light. Oh shit, really? Instead of electricity. Instead of electricity, this is how these people live. Wow. Right. And then, you know, something one person told me brought me to his mud Hut. He was like, hey, he's like, one thing about Africa is that we would never starve. Because if I have a pot of rice, we have a pot of rice. And he pointed like down to the neighborhood. Yeah.

1:48:32 And I was like, fuck. So it's like when. You you think if you think if they're all rich, they keep that same mentality. I don't know, right? Because poverty brings out the best in you, right? It could. It could, Yeah, Yeah, you're right. Yeah, it could. It could, right. But also, you know, in in Speaking of it, right, for a, say conversation, being rich can too, because you if you share. Sure, sure. If you share I was talking to my sister about this yesterday. I think that money, just like alcohol almost accentuates what's in US, you know, and if you've got like a good like if like I was talking to my sister about this yesterday, because we're both talking about how like we're working towards like we're listen, like we're we, she's she, we both have two kids. We both have a mortgage. We both are trying to like make our way through the world And like, you know, I mean, things are not as comfortable as we would let you know, as we as and as everyone would always like more, right? You know, and we're like, but we're working towards it and we're learning to appreciate what we have. And I was like, and then when we do have it, we're not happy because we have money.

1:49:26 We're happy because we're happy and money helps us too, you know, like, and we're like, that's fucking awesome, you know? But people get, you know, I know that I know a lot of people that get rich overnight and if they're not worked on, they it's like, it just accentuates whatever they're already like, but times more, you know, like if you're in a shitty mood and you drink a bunch of beer, you're just in a bad mood. You're just like a angry dude. You know, you're in a green mood and you drink a bunch of beer like, Oh yeah, everyone's like best friend. I fucking love everyone. You know, I think, I think it's the same thing. Yeah, so hot button subject, right? Yeah, Andrew Tate talks about that a lot. Dude, what's this guy's deal? OK, so I'm I'm gonna tell you I. Don't know anything about him. I'm I have like a natural aversion just because of what I've heard about. I don't know anything about.

1:50:06 Him OK, so just to give you a back history of him, right, Andrew Tate's dad was a grand champion chess master, a grand, a Grand Master in chess. OK. And that's what he did for work. For work, yes. So naturally he taught his kids chess. And Andrew Tate has a high ass ELO. How you do one thing, you do everything. So because I knew this history about him, I knew that in looking at him, when everybody's talking shit, you can't take it for face value. You really got to dig in because if it's just some asshole on the Internet talking shit, right, you could take that like, like there's plenty of assholes on the Internet talking shit that I can't fucking stand.

1:50:51 Yeah, because I know that Tate is such a good chess player, it made me more open to see what he's doing. So in I forgot what year it was. It might have been 2022. Andrew Tay got really popular because what he did is he told he has a school called Hustlers University. Right. That's like a marketing thing, right? Well, he teaches people what what he says is like 12 modern, I think it's 12 modern wealth creation methods, which is like usually from the Internet. And he says that he teaches people just how to make money. So it's like, it's like you could go into the school and you could like pick a subject like AI and then like there's a guy like a professor there that will will teach you everything there is to know the AI to start making money.

1:51:39 OK. And he says that he, he wants people to get rich because he doesn't like just having such few friends or whatever like or some shit goes down. Like he wants people to be able to support him. So like that's his that's what he says is why he does that, right. So. Bigger chest move, yeah. Yeah, right. Because like, if some shit goes down, he's going to need big pictures. Because you start off with the Hustlers University and then you could go and like, you could pay X amount of money to become like part of like his, like his organization. And then like, you could like do meet ups with him and shit. And then like when he trusts you enough, he like brings you in the circle. OK, Right. That's like his thing. OK, OK. If you look at a lot of the things that he did when he was blowing up on the Internet in the Hustlers University, he's like, yo, if you take my videos and you just make little clips and post them on Instagram, post them on YouTube, post them on Twitter, post them on wherever.

1:52:29 Yeah, right. You can get X amount of money if they sign up for for Houston University, right? So he's making it a sense of on both sides, right? With so many different pages posting Andrew Tate's content, he became viral. Yeah. And what he was talking about was super controversial, right? Mainly like he would say some misogynist, misogynist shit while simultaneously telling men that they need to, they need to do stuff like work out, be strong, learn how to fight, learn how to be rich so that you could take care of your family, right. And if you look at, you could look at find him talking like sweet about women and saying that like, I do all this so I can take care of my women.

1:53:11 It's not that I hate women, right? So you, so you got to look at his long form content to understand truly that him becoming viral in the way that he did was a chess move so that he could create more wealth for himself. And he has like fucking 10 kids. So he could just pass that down to his kids. Now, is he a good person? Is he a bad person? I don't fucking know. But what I do know is that people are trying to put him in jail. He actually went to jail in Romania. But in Romania they've had, they went through his house, have all his video of his security cameras in his house, right? They have all these people and in three years they can't come up with a conviction? Broke all of his security footage. Right.

1:53:58 You had you took half of his fucking super. Cars. So you're saying this guy talks like an animal, but if there's anything to back it then in three years something would have happened? Yeah, like there would have been a conviction right when he came to Florida, fucking Rhonda Sanders in them fucking try to charge him with something. That shit got thrown out because there was no evidence. That's interesting. Right. It's like if the person is truly bad and you have all of this stuff you took from his house when he wasn't expecting it, Yeah, he got roped at thinking like 2024 New Year's. You didn't think as a chess player you'd expect to get caught at one point, or to expect to get given a hard time? Good question, right? But it's like if you were doing bullshit at your house, like you would slip up somehow. Yeah, I do right.

1:54:45 Like. There's cameras, right? It cameras all the time, and let's just say you get an argument with your wife or you talk too crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They can take them. But look how violent he is, Yeah? Yeah, yeah. You never had anything like that. If if there was something that could've. And the media is hot. Media is awesome of digging that shit up too. Yes. So if there was something in those video recordings, that's a good point, Substantial. That's a fair point. The witnesses, those girls that were that were right since he did shit, there was substantial evidence he would be under the jail now, right? But they couldn't keep him in jail because they don't have enough evidence. How do you not have enough evidence? Right? Right. This guy's a rapist. This guy's whatever you call a trafficker.

1:55:26 This guy's whatever, you know, like where's he's. American let's innocent until proven guilty. Where is the proven guilty? This shit has been going on for so long. Where is the proven guilty? Yeah, so until they prove him guilty, I'm just going to listen with a grain of salt. Right. Listen with a grain of salt. Yeah, and that goes back to what we were talking about earlier with hey man, I'm an adult. I could determine for myself what I'm listening to, if there's something that's for me or not. Yeah, or like so on that same principle, right? I ban my kids from Roblox, their favorite fucking game in the whole world. By the way, apparently it's a shit show with traffickers and shit like that. Yes, The reason why I did this, OK, I understand that. Like, was it Minecraft and shit? Like all of those games where it's like on the Internet and like people can talk to each other? First thing I told them was like, don't fucking talk to nobody.

1:56:13 Yeah, I don't care what they say. You do not talk to anybody in one of those fucking games. Yeah, OK, That's one thing. The CEO of Roblox banned this one user who got groomed off of Roblox. Wow. I don't know his exact story or what happened when he got groomed, but he did. He there was a grooming. Yeah, right, of this kid. So what he did is that he started posing as a child and he was catching predators on Roblox and then getting him arrested. Nice, yeah. CEO comes out, he's like, there will be no vigilantes on this platform. Ban that guy. Whoa. So second, he banned that guy. He banned the dude that was catching pedophiles. Seen the fucking pedophiles so now I have to have an uncomfortable conversation with the kids. I'm like fuck.

1:57:03 By the way, it's not that uncomfortable conversation. Well, I know you love this game, guys, but it's dangerous, and apparently the company's actively fighting to stop the dangerous things from stopping, so I don't know what to tell. You that's what, 6 year old? You can get hurt. I don't want to get hurt. Yes, I have to keep reminding him. Yeah, you do. You're going to have to drill it into. His favorite game that all his friends are playing. All his friends are talking. About right, yeah, Yeah. I have to explain to him, listen, the person who owns Roblox, he supports people who hurts kids. Yeah. Well, how does he do that daddy? Well, the guy that was trying to help, trying to help protect the kids he banned. He puts Superman in jail, Superman in jail. He puts Superman in jail, right?

1:57:46 He's like, I'm like, do you, do you support people that hurt kids? No. But I really like the game. And I'm like Khalil, I understand. He's trying to separate the art from the artist. Yeah. Right, which I understand. Yeah, totally. But like, these are one of those hard life lessons that you have to learn on a man. So as a man, like, you have to stand on principle. I'm like, Khalil, first of all, you're an amazing artist. You should be. You should be drawing. When will you play a fucking game anyway? Yeah, Right. And I do put restrictions on them. Like you. You asked me Like, what do I do as a parent? Yeah. One thing is like in Saturday morning, OK, Sunday morning when they wake up, they have to brush their teeth. They have to do 50 push ups before they touch the TV or touch an iPad. Nice. Right, because they have to understand that their hygiene and their training is 10 times as important as that fucking game. Yeah.

1:58:33 Good for you. Right. Good for you. Thank you. That's awesome. So part of that is the reason why they were able to let it go. So sure. Because they realized it wasn't. Their life wasn't evolving around. That yeah. So it's like Khalil and my 6 year old, Cody, my 11 year old, and then my nephew who's 8, right? Like me and my brother. And we're like all family as a unit, right? Raise them as a village. So I told my brother I was like, yo, we got to pan them off this shit. So like, I sat them down. I talked to him like, look, we can't play Roblox anymore. Yeah. I like this is one of those things that you're not going to understand now that you understand better later. But as a man, you have to stand on principle. We do not support people that hurt kids in this family. You guys playing that is going to make that guy money. Yeah, yeah.

1:59:13 So it's a great point. It's a great point. It's a great thing to do. It's a great thing to do. Yeah. Yeah. Here's a question. You want to keep on going. You want to save the psychedelics all the other work for. Another time, up to you. I could fucking talk shit. I don't have anywhere to be right now, so it's just up to you. Though let's what time we have here 210, let's go another 20 minutes. Cool, what do you want to talk about? Ayahuasca story. Yeah. Well, let's let's talk about ayahuasca was that we use Ayahuasca in a therapeutic setting. Let me tell you. Like for the therapeutic purposes rather. Yeah, Ayahuasca you can't do jokingly, you can't like.

1:59:55 What was it? Like ayahuasca, you had to go to Peru. Yeah, I went to Peru. OK, tell me about. That I won't do ayahuasca in the United States. I'm a little bit of a purist, OK, Cuz I respect the medicine. Yeah, and the culture. And the culture. Yeah, right. So remember when I tell you that girl broke up with me? Said that she was more. Yeah, she felt like more of a man in a relationship, right? Looking at it in my 30s, I'm like, oh, she was absolutely fucking right. OK. She was cheating on me, right? She was 22. Some fucking 30 year old slid in her DMS OK, as a 30 something year old man, I could go steal the fucking girlfriend from any 22 year old right now. Yeah, right. Because at the end of the day, women are attracted to status. And confidence and protect and safety. Yeah, Yeah, right.

2:00:36 They're attracted to all of that OK status, though. It's like it makes him feel safe. Like if he's like OK, I didn't really I knew this as a concept, but I didn't really see it until I got my black belt and I started blowing up my social media right, because they were in 2021, like I was making a video a day. I blew up my followers to like 994 hundred. Nice right And as a man, like if you get 10,000, like you kind of made it on social media. A girl is like 100K because if you got a pretty face, you're going to get fucking yeah right. I'm sorry. I don't have an ass to flaunt my fucking bitch. You could, Yeah. You. Could you? Get the whole thing is. Fucking problem, right?

2:01:18 This thing is bad as publicity. So what was I talking about? You're talking about this girl that she cheated on you with a 10 year old? Yeah. So I get it. I understand now. Back then though, I was fucking heart broke yo. Heartbreak sucks. Heartbreak sucks. That shit is a feeling that just doesn't fucking go away. And it eats out a dude. It eats out a man, dude. Right, so like the other day, the other day, you know, usually I'm a little rough, but like this student fucking came out to me is like professor, like, you know, I've been missing a lot because, you know, this girl broke up with me and I just gave him a hug. I was like bro. Bring it in, dude. I was like, come here. I understand. Like, listen, you can't stay bogged down by that. But I understand how much that hurts. Like, yeah, I, I went into like daddy mode at that point. I get it.

2:02:02 Like that shit fucking. Stink. It hurts, it doesn't go away. It just fucking lingers. I get it. So there was a point where I just was like, fuck this. Like I was studying social work for my bachelor's where I got my degree because I want to become a therapist to help veterans. Really, yes. I veered away from that when I got my black belt because I realized that I can help veterans in jiu jitsu. Yeah, doing something I like instead of being bogged down by the bureaucracy. And you're creating a world for them that's probably healthy for them to live in. Yeah, instead of just sit in front of them and fucking. So tell me how PTSD affects your life.

2:02:43 Yeah, You know what I mean? It's fucking stupid. And plus, like, trauma gets, I could nerd out on trauma all day, but just trauma gets stored in the nonverbal parts of your brain, in your limbic system. Yeah. You can't talk it out. You have to literally do something to get it out really. So if you're going to do therapy, you should do EMDR which is eye movement. Oh dude my someone I know just got certified in that and I I don't know anything about it. That's the only, to me, that's the only one that effectively works against trauma because like when I did EMDR, it's like we start talking about a childhood memory that I I forgot a whole piece of what happened and I'm talking about it and bro, it's like the fucking memory just goes. Shooting to the front.

2:03:25 Bro and you're like. Wow. Yeah, and usually fucking you start trying and it's like it, it's like a new memory, but you know that it happened. Yeah, it is insane. Wow, I wonder if those can be manipulated. I don't know bro it it. Was because that's the MK Ultra shit, you know that's like mind control shit to like bring back like start someone's association because memories are weak. Yeah, generally speaking, like, like the more you tell a story, you'll notice that like it changes the more you tell it. Right. To sound better, yeah, but it's like I'm talking about a memory. Yeah, it's literally vividly playing in my frontal. Cord, I gotcha. I gotcha. And I was like, Oh my God, like, I'm living it again. And I'm like, this happened, that happened, that happened.

2:04:05 And she's like, okay, well, that happened. Like, you know, 'cause you make a judgment about yourself. Yeah. You're like, oh, I'm a monster. I am this. I am weak. I'm whatever. Yeah. So then they help you reprocess the memory. So it's like almost like you go back in time and reprocess. Yeah. That's what people use, psychedelics. Too, the way that you do it, yeah. To be associating. The way that you do it is you do like bilateral brain stimulation. So like they'll have you do this like tap your left and right arm, left and right knee, or they'll have you like follow your finger. So like you're going back and forth with your eyes. Yeah. And that's what. And they start asking you certain questions. They. Wow. Amazing. Brings the fucking. I want to try that. Yeah. EMDR. Go do it, bro. Yeah. If you're going to do any therapy, it's that that one works. OK, but sit there and talk about your problems.

2:04:47 It's a Band-Aid. It's a Band-Aid. So I didn't want to do that. All right, So I was in my master's program my first night and I'm like, I am not fucking doing that. This is a girl who I got my bachelor's with and she's I'm like, I'm like, listen, I'm like, I'm going to fucking call my cousin. I'm going to text my cousin right now who's a pilot and I'm going to ask him how much to get me to Peru. And then I'm going to fucking figure out an ayahuasca retreat. And I'm fucking dropping out of all my classes tonight, really. And I'm out, bro. So said so done. And. You did. It a week. I was in fucking Peru. Really spent a month there. A month and you had no plans? You didn't. Have you been there before? No, I'll travel solo. All I need to do for travel is find an Airbnb in a judicial school close to it right?

2:05:32 And I'm fucking gone. I feel like a lot of people, once you get in jiu jitsu, are like that, right? Like you don't need a lot of that point. I would think so. Yeah. Cuz then at the jiu jitsu gym you figure out everything. Everywhere I go now, I'm like, I'm thinking where, where, where's the, where's the school relative to me that like, OK, yeah. So yeah, it's worth going to, you know, I feel. That Yeah, now you go visit schools, right? So, you know, I started learning about psychedelics. I started learning about ayahuasca in particular. So I'm like, you know, I'm going to Peru. Fuck it. So I show up to Peru. I was flying standby. So I, I flew in a day before my Airbnb start.

2:06:15 So they had this thing back then. This was like 2014, OK? They had this thing back then called couch surfing. Yeah. You remember couch surfing? I mean, I know the concepts. OK. So basically it's like Airbnb. For broke people, OK. Right. It's literally a thing called couch surfing. Yeah. I mean, couch surfing, just crashing those couches. It's an app. Cool. I can say hey my apartment has a couch. You can use the bathrooms. You can use the common area. You could stay for X amount of nights and here and like you could see my reviews of people saying reviews about me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then people users who who go couch surf you write reviews.

2:06:57 About them. About them. Yeah, totally. It's great, yeah. So on couch surfing I'm like fuck, I need to find somewhere. So I'm I'm on, I'm on couch surfing. I forgot how I found out about couch surfing, but I'm on couch surfing and I find this guy from Iceland. OK. Who He made a lot of money back in his 20s, so in his 30s he used to just rent a expensive place in a foreign country and stay there and do psychedelics. Cool. Because he studied, he was like Terence McKenna. He studied the psychology behind it and then just wanted to experiment what happens when you mix DMT and mushrooms? What happens when you do mushrooms in LSD? And he just want, he like was experimenting like he did, I saw him do, because you could get ayahuasca in the fucking in the markets there.

2:07:49 Like it's really nothing. Like it's nothing, Billy. You could just go grab it. Not the right way to fucking do it. OK, OK. But I've seen him do ayahuasca and DMTDMT last 15 seconds, 15 minutes. Yeah. But it feels like an eternity. Yeah. When you add ayahuasca on top of it, Ayahuasca has a MAOAMAOI inhibitor or something like that, which there's something in the ayahuasca like if you can eat. Most of these plants have DMT in it. OK, so there's. A vine in the Amazon that when you combine it with a certain leaf. Yes, yes, yes, that activate it triggers it. It triggers it right? So when you smoke DMT and you do ayahuasca at the same time, it makes the DMT last longer?

2:08:32 Oh shit, really? Yeah. So you so now you do a 30 minute DMT trip rather than. And that lasts like 2 eternities. Yeah, so like that's what like the like the psychedelic nerds will call it a breakthrough. OK, You're you're able to get breakthroughs easier when you combine the two. OK, I didn't try that because I respect ayahuasca. Yeah, right. That's just my personal I've. Heard a lot of people talk about the medicine like that, where you have to respect. It's like it's own entity that you have to like, respect and like treat like a particular way. Yeah, right. Because like, the difference between Ayahuasca and DMT is that ayahuasca, they both take you to the same realm. Except ayahuasca, you're greeted with a motherly spirit that's going to give you exactly what you need. Yeah. Whereas DMT they just bring you in the realm. It's like gnomes that kind of talk to you and like they'll show you shit.

2:09:18 Yeah, I don't know what the fuck is going on. They're not going to explain too much. Yeah, I'm a little nervous about DMT. That's not anything I'm ready to dive into yet. I'm going to do LSD again. I'm going to do shrooms again. Yeah, even ayahuasca sounds like. I don't even know if it's anything that's tempting to me. I don't know. We'll see. I kind of feel like it's a motherly spirit that calls you. Yeah, you know, that could be wool shit, but it's. Like I feel. I felt the, I felt the, I felt like, like it was funny when I was dating my wife, my wife, she's very sensitive to just substance abuse in general. And, and she asked me while we're dating if I ever, if I did drugs. And I was like, well, I'm not going to lie about this, especially like something like real like rooms or LSD. I'm like, so I didn't she's like, so you're going to like keep on doing it. And I'm like, let me explain something.

2:09:59 I was like, I did LSD twice in my life and I don't know the next time I'm ever going to feel the need to do it again, you know, like, yeah, it might be in five years, it might be in 50 years, it might be in six months. You know, like, I have no idea. But like it's going to like, like it's not a thing that's like addicting, like you just want to do everyday. You don't want to drink a six pack of beer like you want to take a tablet LSD. Yeah, no, yeah. Definitely, you know, and so I had to explain this, yeah, recently. And then actually I did a breath work instead of that. They really felt the pull and I, I didn't have it on me and my and we, I tried a breath work class and I was like, this was what I was looking for. Yes, you know, I got it because. You could, you could achieve those states in breath and like, that's kind of like what Mother Ayawaska told me.

2:10:41 So boom, right. So it's like I wanted to, so I, I, I scheduled my trip for 30 days, right? I got the Airbnb for 30 days, but I had to go couch surfing with Fionn is the guy's name. So I show up a day early, I go on couch surfing. Me and him have this crazy back and forth conversation, like he was trying to test me, like my intellect. Yeah, but I'm a pretty smart motherfucker passing to come to certain ship. But like, yeah, I'm gonna catch intellect, right? I'm a little nerd like that. So we're going back and forth and I guess like, I passed this test. He was asking me crazy questions. Like he's like, there's a shaman over here and there's this over there, there's that over there and there's there's fucking assassins in the corners. Like, what do you do? And I was like, well, I'm going to do this.

2:11:21 It was a crazy conversation, but whatever. He approved the fucking couch surfing. OK, So I show up to to, to the, to the house, and there's this fucking giant of a man, blonde hair, blue eyes. Fuck it. I shake his hand. I'm looking up at him. I shake his hand. One of the best guys I've ever met. Yeah. OK, in the house with him though, the other couch surfers that were there was this Brazilian girl, Irish girl and this couple from Spain. Cool. OK, it's important on this Jamaican girl too. We use dating go. To the cigar, by the way. No, I'm. Good, we'll go with this. One So then what happened is so the very next day I had to go on the ayahuasca journey.

2:12:04 So I spent the night with them right at the end of the at the at the next day when I was about to go to the, to the, to the shaman. Yeah. They are like, Drew, you're cool. I know you have 30 days at that Airbnb in the city, but they're in the Sacred Valley. They're like, if you want to come back here, like, we don't mind. I was like, oh, perfect. Yeah, bro. The house that they were staying at was the most beautiful place I've ever been to. Peru, Cusco. Peru has beautiful Green Mountains everywhere. OK, OK. The house was like centered on its own lot. Neighbor was far as fuck away. The guy who owned the house left a giant like dog there. It was like AI don't know if it was a German Shepherd cuz I think it maybe it'd been a mastiff.

2:12:48 Like it's like a big hairy dog giant, right? That you, that if you stay there, you got to like feed it and stuff. Like he had people come take care of it. But the dog was on. Yeah, you got to take care of it. The big ass dog's there and all these people are there. They doing fires every night like it was fucking amazing cooking like we all like shared resources cooking the girls bro amazing. So then what happened is so I end up staying there. So we had the the Airbnb in the city, but I didn't even go there. I paid 400 bucks for. It. I might have slept there like. A week. Yeah, yeah, right. Why would you even you know? And then there was a there was a river coming off of the mountain right next to the house, so it always sounded like it was raining when you were in. Beautiful, bro, Beautiful.

2:13:35 I would go back there in a second. So show up to the ayahuasca center and they're like, all right, you can't eat this, you can't eat that. Because one thing that you used to do to deal with altitude sickness is drink coca leaves. OK. Coca leaf tea. OK, it just felt like you drank a cup of coffee. Yeah, stimulant. Yeah, there's a couple of coffee, but it takes away altitude sickness. OK. That's why when I was went to Colorado, I was like, motherfucker, like I could see you, like, chew on the coca leaves. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they have them everywhere. Like in every little shop or whatever. Like there's like a bowl of coca leaves that you could take and like they have like you can make the hot water like it's like nothing. Yeah.

2:14:17 Because when I first got there, like I walked up the steps and I was like, that was a hot shit. Purple belt, 160 lbs, best shape of my life. Walking up a fucking flight of stairs and I'm like. Yeah. I drink some coca tea. I'm fine. That's crazy. Yeah. Really cool. It takes away the headaches and, like, stomach aches, whatever. So anyways, go to the ayahuasca center. They're like, you can't drink any coca tea here. You can't drink any seasoning. Like, there's like a diet that you have to follow. And then they make you detox. You drink this volcanic water, you shit yourself, right? It's like water that kind of tastes like kombucha, OK, orange. And you fucking drink like 15 glasses of that and you completely purge your system. OK. Then you have a shaman from the mountains, a shaman from the jungle, a shaman from the mountains clears your energy, fucking douses you with essential oils and fucking the Palo Santo and the and the cool. What's the other thing that you shake around with? Did you did you make smoky?

2:15:12 Eucalyptus. No, Great. It's great. I don't. Know clears your energy. I forgot sage, sage, sage you. Now whatever prepares you says your prayers. Pray to whatever God you want to get you ready during the daytime, nighttime, the shaman from the jungle comes in and he's like splashes you with fucking essential oils and it tells you meditate 30 minutes. So you take the ayahuasca, you meditate another 30 minutes and then boom, you're gone. You're gone. So I'm meditating. I took the ayahuasca. It tastes like kombucha and Malta mixed. OK. Is the best. Is the best way I could describe it yeah, I'm drinking it right. And then I meditate on for 30 minutes and then I open my eyes and then the shamans like singing. He sings Ikaros.

2:15:53 These are beautiful songs that guide you to the journey because he takes it too. And he sings Ikaros the whole time, right. They're beautiful. Go on YouTube and Ikaros. They're they're beautiful. So he starts singing and bro, he goes like this to lay down and I just see this. I see like waves like bro I'm in ancient Egypt. No way. Streets of gold. I'm looking at all the Egyptian gods like Osiris. And yeah, yeah, yeah, what they look like is. Exactly what they would look like. Like like picture picture Egyptian gods with the fucking animal and stuff. Giants, pyramids, streets of gold and Ephraim.

2:16:35 It was the best feeling I've ever felt in my life. The only thing that I could equate it to is imagine just having a nonstop orgasm. Really. Not ejaculation, just the orgasm like that, like heightened feeling of like it just it feels amazing. And it's like, goodness, release. No release. Not a release. No, it's just full of good energy. OK, right before the release, but just like, yeah, constant. Yeah. I'm like, Oh my God, this place feels so good. Like, is this heaven? Like, what is this? So then I was like, oh, mother ayahuasca, what's my next step in life? Because the shamans to tell you to ask her so the little old lady pops up and she looks back at me, right.

2:17:20 She goes, this is your universe created disappears. So bro, I start erecting pyramids, making secret geometrical figures. I start creating buildings like just creating my world. And I was like, you know what Mother Alaska, I want divine intelligence. So these little fairies come and they open up my left hand and they like, you see them like put some shit in there and they fucking disappear. And I'm like, oh, I was like, I want, I don't know why I think I'm dealing with a fucking genie. Yeah. I was like, oh, divine intelligence, right. So they come back, little fairies come and they open up my head and they fucking and leave. So I was like, oh.

2:18:02 Strange. Bro I started to grow into a giant and what I realized is that my ego was inflating. Yeah. So I was like, oh, I was like, no, no, no, no, no. I was like, mother ayahuasca, this is not why I'm here. Like, I didn't come here for an ego trip. Like I just came for enlightenment. Just pops back up. She goes, if you wish for me to open your third eye, you have to give me your right eye disappears. So now I'm like, fuck, should I wear a patch? Like, should I make this deal? Yeah, like, you know, what am I doing? So then now I go through a phase where like I'm creating shit and I stop and I get lost in what I'm doing and I stop. I go back and forth until I like, don't ask me why I did this, but I sat down and I was just like, no, right. And everything just stops.

2:18:57 And I was like, mother ayahuasca, this is not why I'm here, right? And as she pops up and she's like, how are we supposed to help you with anything when you're trying to control everything? She's like, either give me your right eye or master meditation. Those are your choices. And this now I'm like, fuck. So I don't remember what's going on. But like this is, it lasts for four hours and I'm like 3 hours in at this point. So now like I got up and I threw up, right? And when I threw up, you, you throw up in buckets because the shamans take your vomit and they put it into back into the river, OK.

2:19:38 Because they say it's like, sacred. Yeah. You know, and and ayahuasca binds to the impurities in your body and it you have to throw it up. Yeah, you get rid of it. Yeah, you. Have to get rid of it so you throw up. So I threw up so much to where like I started dry heaving. When I dry heaved I seen like black energy come out. Wow, like black smoke, almost like it was the craziest shit and I was like. That's what you want to get rid of. Yeah. And then like I fucking now I felt like I had to shit. So like, I go to the fucking bathroom and I look in the mirror and like all like the different lives I've ever lived there. Like faces are flashing in the mirror and I'm like, Oh my God. I'm not ready for this, no. And I sit on the toilet, bro, and I'm like, fuck. And I take like, you know, I take a shit, right? But it's the ayahuasca coming out, right? It's like I'm like taking a shit. I'm like, fuck, got the runs and I looked down. It's like all like snakes in the fucking. Yeah.

2:20:33 I would die dude, I would have a heart attack. I halfway wiped myself, I don't even know if I did it right because I'm so fucked up and I go lay back down. So I had other visions. The other visions didn't stand out to me as much as this one. The girl that I got my heart broke with, I'm like floating in space now and I see ATV screen and it's me and her. And when I look left and right, it's every single moment of our relationship going simultaneously. I look up, she's getting old, I look down, she's getting younger.

2:21:16 They it's like the entire life is just on TV screens. Wow, going on at the same time I was like what the fuck is this? The only thing I can make reference to is like Interstellar, Yeah. He's watching. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, you know how like the guy was floating and like he's looking at like, you know, he's, he's in that. Dimension, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think the bookshelves, that's where he pops the bookshelf out of the. Movie so it's like an experience like that, like and that's the only thing I could reference to like oh, like this like interstellar. So I'm looking at it and be on time. I was her, I guess, because like I like was affected so much emotionally by her, but at that point, like I wasn't too like I, I wasn't like grieving her anymore.

2:22:00 Sorry about that. OK, yeah, you weren't grieving anymore. Yeah, I wasn't grieving her anymore. So why she showed up in the vision, I'm not sure, but I guess the I don't know. I don't know why she showed up. So then after that. I think the control thing was fascinating, though. The control thing isn't it, by the way, Because in Judaism, by the way, with God, the right side is like power and strength and what's called din are like justice. And then the left side is kindness and, and loving and charity. And like, if you're closing, if you're, if you're giving your, your, your right eye, that means that you're giving. That means that you'd have a lot of emphasis on like the justice building, like the, the hard ass stuff. And like you had to focus more on like for your third eye, you got to balance, you got to find balance between the two of them. Love that.

2:22:52 Yes, yes. So now here's the trippy part right finish the journey. I go back to the air to to the to the couch surfing. As I'm getting into the compound, the girl from Brazil and the girl from Ireland are going to like what would be like a Peruvian BBQ. OK, but it was 2 hours away by bus right next to one of the sacred sites. So I'm like stay like you want to come with us? I'm like, sure. So now the whole bus ride, I'm like, fuck, was that real? Or was it just like drugs? You know, Like did it really Like, you know, I'm going back and forth, like just wondering like fuck, like that was crazy. So two hours in the bus, I'm listening like I'm just like kind of like just looking at Peru and just thinking about this.

2:23:44 We get to the place and there's the Iowa Skiddo there, and Iowa Skiddo is a guy who will go get it from the market. You want to do ayahuasca? Come on, man, we'll do ayahuasca together. He's not a shaman, though. A shaman is like, if I'm your father and I'm a shaman, when you turn 14, you're going to go through the ayahuasca and then you're going to become a shaman, right? Yeah, that's how shamans work. But ayahuascahetto, like their parents were never shamans. They just fucking did. Yeah, yeah, 'cause it's there. Is it this guy history shamans? This guy had this tattoo, so I have a tattoo on my elbow. OK. Right, let me see. You can probably can't see too much with the hair. Yeah. What is it?

2:24:24 It's a it's a Jaguar. Yeah, that's how I was going to say it looks like a leopard of Jaguar. It looks like a Jaguar. Now look at his third eye in his right eye. Third eye in the right eye on your elbow. Yeah. OK. The red one. Yeah. Yeah. What about it? So the right eye was closed and the third eye was open. Oh shit. Right. So I was like, oh shit. I was like, I'm like, listen, I'm like, I did ayahuasca last night, and she was talking about how she had to take my third eye. Yeah. I mean, take my right eye in order for my third eye to open. And like, I see this. I'm two hours away. Like, bro, I started freaking the fuck out and he starts laughing at me. And he's like, bro, he's like, you take this reality too serious.

2:25:06 He's like every religion talks about how this is an illusion. Yeah. He's like, you're too caught up in the illusion. He's like, she wants you to meditate so that you could get to those type of places without having to use the medicine. Beautiful. Right. So just like any other mother, she wants you to live your life without having to depend on her. Yeah. And I was like. That's beautiful. So I was like, damn, like that happened there and this is. That's incredible. That's an incredible, that's an incredible, incredible. So all my doubts, I was like, OK, that was real. Yeah, there's no way that it was. No, it has to be. It has to be so. That's my experience that I was. Wow, they say. You know, I what makes something a miracle? It's it's correlation in time with your intention or event, right? Like if I tell you it's going to rain and then the sky just open up and it starts raining as soon as it comes out of my mouth, you're like, wow, if it's going to rain and three days from now it starts raining, I'm like, see, I told you, you're like, go fuck yourself.

2:25:59 You know, I don't care, you know, so like, but something so specific and so detailed and then to just like happen like is like that's too close, like it's too good. It's too. It's too. What was the chances that I left the Ayahuasca center? I That's not high enough. Not high enough for me to bet on. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Do you catch them? If you put your money on that being something real or that being a total coincidence, what are you gonna do? That's something real to me, as far as I'm concerned. Bro that was enough for me to not question shit. I was like this is legit. Dee Sham is not what they're talking about this Peruvian history. Of yeah, for real. In the Amazon like it's. For real. Yeah, yeah, let's let's call it here.

2:26:41 That's a great way to end it. And we'll do another one. Dude, this is this is ton of fun. And we didn't touch any. We didn't touch a bunch of stuff we want to get to, but I don't give a shit because that was awesome. Dude, thank you so much for doing this. How do? I oh, there we go.